Long term affects - good or bad - of holding back from kindergarten

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kindergarten is not that hard --- I mean they REALLY start at square 1 and any kid who has gone to pre-school is probably bored for the first 3 mos. I don't understand the fear that kindergarten today is so challenging.

This is a sign that you don't know what you are talking about. In kindergarten kids have to focus on and join in on classroom activities. There's much more structure, more sitting and paying attention. It isn't so much the writing and such, its that in kindergarten the kids learn how to be students in school. Sure for many kids -- especially girls -- this is not problem. For my DS, even after we held him back (August bday) he struggled with these skills.

Actually, I think it's a sign that your child has issues unrelated to his age. It's not the demands of kindergarten that were so far beyond his (or another younger kid's) abilities. I DO know about kindergarten and there isn't THAT much sitting still. If your child can't sit and focus for 15 min. -- then there is an issue -- but not necessarily one that will be "fixed" by waiting. The vast majority of kids born in July, Aug., Sept. CAN handle the demands of kindergarten and I think your experience with your child's attention (which is not typical) is causing you to see kindergarten as so hard. I think you are doing a disservice to a lot of parents by suggesting that kindergarten is something big and scary. Kindergarten teachers are prepared to deal with 5 year olds and all their 5-year old immaturity.

[Anonymous]

I will likely hold my summer birthday boy back just because I think it will be an advantage for him (which means disadvantage for the other kids). I get to choose to do this, so complain if you want. I don't really care what you think about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kindergarten is not that hard --- I mean they REALLY start at square 1 and any kid who has gone to pre-school is probably bored for the first 3 mos. I don't understand the fear that kindergarten today is so challenging.

This is a sign that you don't know what you are talking about. In kindergarten kids have to focus on and join in on classroom activities. There's much more structure, more sitting and paying attention. It isn't so much the writing and such, its that in kindergarten the kids learn how to be students in school. Sure for many kids -- especially girls -- this is not problem. For my DS, even after we held him back (August bday) he struggled with these skills.

Actually, I think it's a sign that your child has issues unrelated to his age. It's not the demands of kindergarten that were so far beyond his (or another younger kid's) abilities. I DO know about kindergarten and there isn't THAT much sitting still. If your child can't sit and focus for 15 min. -- then there is an issue -- but not necessarily one that will be "fixed" by waiting. The vast majority of kids born in July, Aug., Sept. CAN handle the demands of kindergarten and I think your experience with your child's attention (which is not typical) is causing you to see kindergarten as so hard. I think you are doing a disservice to a lot of parents by suggesting that kindergarten is something big and scary. Kindergarten teachers are prepared to deal with 5 year olds and all their 5-year old immaturity.

Its hard for some. When my DS did start kindergarten it was a challenge but one that he met, because he was ready. I never said kindergarten is big and scary -- seriously, you can disagree without misstating what I wrote. You don't speak for kindergarten teachers, thats for sure. They would be the first to want my child to wait a year. And if you were the parent of another child in the class, you would be the second. Because you would be on these boards complaining about all the attention being diverted to the child who shouldn't be there.

[Anonymous]

We held back our summer bday kid.

From reading this thread, I think I see that the contention is between parents with summer bday kids that hold back and parents with summer bday kids that do not want to hold back.

I can see why there is this feeling. There are a few parents at our bus stop who have summer bday kids they put into K on schedule. Holding back effectively takes away some kids of the same age / development and replaces them with kids a year older.

The spring bday examples / 18 month birth range arguments sound like exaggerations for effect. And I think pre school / day care expense and attractiveness of full day kindergarten are factors in the decision that people do not like to mention.

[Anonymous]

PP here - parents sending kids on schedule can take comfort in knowing they in all probability have made the smart economic decision. Basically you are talking about a year's worth of lifetime earnings in addition to the current year of preschool / day care saved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here - parents sending kids on schedule can take comfort in knowing they in all probability have made the smart economic decision. Basically you are talking about a year's worth of lifetime earnings in addition to the current year of preschool / day care saved.

Yep. If the equation only includes dollars and cents, you're right.

[Anonymous]

Why is it so hard to understand that it is unfair to the on schedule 5 year olds to have 7 year olds in their kindergarten class!?? It's one thing if the redshirted kid really needed to be held back for developmental reasons but to hold back to create a "leader" is just wrong! The schools need to clue in and start demanding real reasons to hold back. Your kid is five, he belongs in kindergarten, unless you have a documented reason to keep your kid out of school.

[Anonymous]

I met a mom holding back an early May birthday recently. There are no delays. They said they are doing it so he won't be small (he is a few inches taller than my April bday son :roll and just so he won't be young. This kid will be 7 in KINDERGARTEN. That is just frickin weird to me.

[Anonymous]

Why is it so hard to understand that it is up to the parent to decide what is best for their kid?

Let's put it another way: If the school was telling you:

Your kid is fat and needs to lose weight.
Your kid is not a good runner-they need to get lessons to learn how to run
Your kid is ugly-get a hairuct

You all are so willing to make government tell people what to do when it comes to starting school yet I bet all of you would scream bloody murder if the school did the above.

And where is the evidence that the 7 year olds are the leaders int he classroom.

Why not let parents decide what is best for their child whatever the reason. Stop worrying about other people;s kids so much and just worry about your own. (and before anybody says that they are by not having a 7 year old in the classroom, direct evidence not hearsay)

Also, a K who is starting a year later would be 6, not 7. They would turn 7 in the school year, just as your 5 year old will turn 6.

[Anonymous]

We, the parents of summer-born girls, wish you would not hold your boys back. Or if you do,please require them to only date girls in their grade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I'm not saying this applies to every child, but there is a lot of research out there suggesting that even through high school, children at the younger end of the grade level are at a measurable academic disadvantage. Again, this is at the statistical/macro level and may or may not bear on your decision about your child, but it is certainly food for thought. I believe Malcolm Gladwell addressed this in the book Outliers, although I have read it elsewhere since.

Citations, please. (As far as I know, Malcolm Gladwell was talking about hockey.)

What's more, if you're just looking at test scores, then you shouldn't compare the test scores of (for example) 7-year-old first-graders to 6-year-old first graders. You should compare the test scores of 6-year-old first graders to 6-year-old kindergartners.

PP here. I can't remember where I read this and don't have time to dig it up, but a quick google yielded the following, which says something similar.

http://homes.chass.utoronto.ca/~edhuey/maturity_feb06.pdf

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We, the parents of summer-born girls, wish you would not hold your boys back. Or if you do,please require them to only date girls in their grade.

then tell your girls to stop texting and im'g our sons

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We, the parents of summer-born girls, wish you would not hold your boys back. Or if you do,please require them to only date girls in their grade.

then tell your girls to stop texting and im'g our sons

Wow.

[Anonymous]

I didn't attend kindergarten at all. No ill effects.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
http://homes.chass.utoronto.ca/~edhuey/maturity_feb06.pdf

Thank you for this, but I don't find it convincing, primarily because of how much work the authors had to do to get their data to do what they wanted the data to do.

And even if everything they did was ok, the results still wouldn't (as far as I can tell from the paper) say anything about the effects of either red-shirting or of early entrance to kindergarten.

And test scores are not only an imperfect measure of learning in school but also a bad predictor of success in life -- or even success in college.