Wife Using Pregnancy As An Excuse

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP are you jealous? You sound it along w being resentful and petty. Actually childish. I feel for your wife.

OP here. I’m not jealous. I’m just annoyed that we can’t have proper communication and she is spending like crazy.

Your partner is a representation of you. When that partner starts canceling important things and you constantly have to make excuses for them, it looks bad on you.

For instance, we RSVP to an important wedding. She was in it and so was I. Last minute she decided she don’t want to make the trip ( 1 hour drive) and didn’t go. This made me look like a complete jerk and I had to keep making excuses of why she couldn’t be there.

You sound whiny about wedding. You don’t look like a jerk if you say Sonya is so tired from pregnancy she regrets she can’t make it. No one else cares but you it sounds. And “constantly?” She’s not be pregnant for that long. You sound thin skinned OP.

OP here. The bride was very upset. She was a bridesmaids and assured her many times throughout the pregnancy she would still be able to be her bridesmaids. She canceled the night before the wedding. They no longer talk. The friend has cut her out, which has also affected my relationship with her husband who was a good friend of mine.

If bride can’t understand that someone may need to cancel last minute for a sickness then that’s the bride’s issue.

She literally messed up her wedding but not showing up. Not to mention the money she lost out on for food. It isn’t cheap.

What are you talking about?

[Anonymous]

Your wife doesn’t need two babies, op. You will be the expendable one. Be less needy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP are you jealous? You sound it along w being resentful and petty. Actually childish. I feel for your wife.

OP here. I’m not jealous. I’m just annoyed that we can’t have proper communication and she is spending like crazy.

Your partner is a representation of you. When that partner starts canceling important things and you constantly have to make excuses for them, it looks bad on you.

For instance, we RSVP to an important wedding. She was in it and so was I. Last minute she decided she don’t want to make the trip ( 1 hour drive) and didn’t go. This made me look like a complete jerk and I had to keep making excuses of why she couldn’t be there.

You sound whiny about wedding. You don’t look like a jerk if you say Sonya is so tired from pregnancy she regrets she can’t make it. No one else cares but you it sounds. And “constantly?” She’s not be pregnant for that long. You sound thin skinned OP.

OP here. The bride was very upset. She was a bridesmaids and assured her many times throughout the pregnancy she would still be able to be her bridesmaids. She canceled the night before the wedding. They no longer talk. The friend has cut her out, which has also affected my relationship with her husband who was a good friend of mine.

If bride can’t understand that someone may need to cancel last minute for a sickness then that’s the bride’s issue.

She should have told her in advance. It sounds like OPs wife is an inconsiderate jerk.

DP. I disagree. The wife may have wanted to go, but felt unable at the last minute. I understand completely. It is not a big deal. My only sibling did not attend my wedding because she didn't want to risk traveling while 7 months pregnant. I was disappointed, but I accepted it, of course.

She wasn’t just a guest - she was in the wedding and canceled the day of or night before. That’s incredibly inconsiderate since OP said the bride asked her multiple times if she would be able to be in her wedding and his wife said yes.

[Anonymous]

Lots of whiny lazy women on here. Pregnancy is not a disability. Women have been pregnant for all of time and have raised families while pregnant with multiple children. They all somehow managed.

My mom raised 6 kids largely on her own while my dad worked. I’m 28 weeks pregnant with baby boy #4 and Ive managed to care for all 3 of my kids without help. I was working 40-50 hours a week as a nurse on my feet all day with my first and second. I still cooked dinner nightly and cleaned my house each week while my husband was gone on business for most of the week.

My good friend is a lawyer + runs two side projects while raising two kids. She cooks and cleans daily all on her own. I know many women who raise multiple children largely without any help + maintaining a home and cooking for their families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lots of whiny lazy women on here. Pregnancy is not a disability. Women have been pregnant for all of time and have raised families while pregnant with multiple children. They all somehow managed.

My mom raised 6 kids largely on her own while my dad worked. I’m 28 weeks pregnant with baby boy #4 and Ive managed to care for all 3 of my kids without help. I was working 40-50 hours a week as a nurse on my feet all day with my first and second. I still cooked dinner nightly and cleaned my house each week while my husband was gone on business for most of the week.

My good friend is a lawyer + runs two side projects while raising two kids. She cooks and cleans daily all on her own. I know many women who raise multiple children largely without any help + maintaining a home and cooking for their families.

This is crazy. American women seem to want to be martyrs. Just because circumstances apparently force women to bear such a burden doesn't mean that it is normal or can be expected. Geez, give the poor pregnant women some grace.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of whiny lazy women on here. Pregnancy is not a disability. Women have been pregnant for all of time and have raised families while pregnant with multiple children. They all somehow managed.

My mom raised 6 kids largely on her own while my dad worked. I’m 28 weeks pregnant with baby boy #4 and Ive managed to care for all 3 of my kids without help. I was working 40-50 hours a week as a nurse on my feet all day with my first and second. I still cooked dinner nightly and cleaned my house each week while my husband was gone on business for most of the week.

My good friend is a lawyer + runs two side projects while raising two kids. She cooks and cleans daily all on her own. I know many women who raise multiple children largely without any help + maintaining a home and cooking for their families.

This is crazy. American women seem to want to be martyrs. Just because circumstances apparently force women to bear such a burden doesn't mean that it is normal or can be expected. Geez, give the poor pregnant women some grace.

It’s not a burden. I chose to be a mother and raise my kids. Many others also make this choice. Too many people these days want kids without actually wanting to raise them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of whiny lazy women on here. Pregnancy is not a disability. Women have been pregnant for all of time and have raised families while pregnant with multiple children. They all somehow managed.

My mom raised 6 kids largely on her own while my dad worked. I’m 28 weeks pregnant with baby boy #4 and Ive managed to care for all 3 of my kids without help. I was working 40-50 hours a week as a nurse on my feet all day with my first and second. I still cooked dinner nightly and cleaned my house each week while my husband was gone on business for most of the week.

My good friend is a lawyer + runs two side projects while raising two kids. She cooks and cleans daily all on her own. I know many women who raise multiple children largely without any help + maintaining a home and cooking for their families.

This is crazy. American women seem to want to be martyrs. Just because circumstances apparently force women to bear such a burden doesn't mean that it is normal or can be expected. Geez, give the poor pregnant women some grace.

Pregnancy is not a disability? It can be a disability. I’m on bed rest right now and have to draw from disability. I’m glad you had easy pregnancies. It’s not like that for all of us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lots of whiny lazy women on here. Pregnancy is not a disability. Women have been pregnant for all of time and have raised families while pregnant with multiple children. They all somehow managed.

My mom raised 6 kids largely on her own while my dad worked. I’m 28 weeks pregnant with baby boy #4 and Ive managed to care for all 3 of my kids without help. I was working 40-50 hours a week as a nurse on my feet all day with my first and second. I still cooked dinner nightly and cleaned my house each week while my husband was gone on business for most of the week.

My good friend is a lawyer + runs two side projects while raising two kids. She cooks and cleans daily all on her own. I know many women who raise multiple children largely without any help + maintaining a home and cooking for their families.

Pregnancy IS LITERALLY A DISABILITY.

Hope you don’t say anything this stupid in real life

[Anonymous]

NP. I don’t know. Thinking of quitting at 16 weeks? That seems extreme. I don’t know anyone who wasn’t able to show up to work unless they were on bed rest. I do remember being exhausted with my second, because I was caring for a toddler at the same time, but I could function. But maybe I was just lucky?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. I don’t know. Thinking of quitting at 16 weeks? That seems extreme. I don’t know anyone who wasn’t able to show up to work unless they were on bed rest. I do remember being exhausted with my second, because I was caring for a toddler at the same time, but I could function. But maybe I was just lucky?

Maybe she wants to SAHM? I can also see this as a reaction to years of infertility- not sure if this is the case in for OP though

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of whiny lazy women on here. Pregnancy is not a disability. Women have been pregnant for all of time and have raised families while pregnant with multiple children. They all somehow managed.

My mom raised 6 kids largely on her own while my dad worked. I’m 28 weeks pregnant with baby boy #4 and Ive managed to care for all 3 of my kids without help. I was working 40-50 hours a week as a nurse on my feet all day with my first and second. I still cooked dinner nightly and cleaned my house each week while my husband was gone on business for most of the week.

My good friend is a lawyer + runs two side projects while raising two kids. She cooks and cleans daily all on her own. I know many women who raise multiple children largely without any help + maintaining a home and cooking for their families.

This is crazy. American women seem to want to be martyrs. Just because circumstances apparently force women to bear such a burden doesn't mean that it is normal or can be expected. Geez, give the poor pregnant women some grace.

It’s not a burden. I chose to be a mother and raise my kids. Many others also make this choice. Too many people these days want kids without actually wanting to raise them.

You know the person who does not appear to want to undertake the burden of kids? OP, who expects his wife to change not at all due to pregnancy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of whiny lazy women on here. Pregnancy is not a disability. Women have been pregnant for all of time and have raised families while pregnant with multiple children. They all somehow managed.

My mom raised 6 kids largely on her own while my dad worked. I’m 28 weeks pregnant with baby boy #4 and Ive managed to care for all 3 of my kids without help. I was working 40-50 hours a week as a nurse on my feet all day with my first and second. I still cooked dinner nightly and cleaned my house each week while my husband was gone on business for most of the week.

My good friend is a lawyer + runs two side projects while raising two kids. She cooks and cleans daily all on her own. I know many women who raise multiple children largely without any help + maintaining a home and cooking for their families.

Pregnancy IS LITERALLY A DISABILITY.

Hope you don’t say anything this stupid in real life

Allegedly she is a nurse

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP are you jealous? You sound it along w being resentful and petty. Actually childish. I feel for your wife.

OP here. I’m not jealous. I’m just annoyed that we can’t have proper communication and she is spending like crazy.

Your partner is a representation of you. When that partner starts canceling important things and you constantly have to make excuses for them, it looks bad on you.

For instance, we RSVP to an important wedding. She was in it and so was I. Last minute she decided she don’t want to make the trip ( 1 hour drive) and didn’t go. This made me look like a complete jerk and I had to keep making excuses of why she couldn’t be there.

You sound whiny about wedding. You don’t look like a jerk if you say Sonya is so tired from pregnancy she regrets she can’t make it. No one else cares but you it sounds. And “constantly?” She’s not be pregnant for that long. You sound thin skinned OP.

OP here. The bride was very upset. She was a bridesmaids and assured her many times throughout the pregnancy she would still be able to be her bridesmaids. She canceled the night before the wedding. They no longer talk. The friend has cut her out, which has also affected my relationship with her husband who was a good friend of mine.

If bride can’t understand that someone may need to cancel last minute for a sickness then that’s the bride’s issue.

She should have told her in advance. It sounds like OPs wife is an inconsiderate jerk.

DP. I disagree. The wife may have wanted to go, but felt unable at the last minute. I understand completely. It is not a big deal. My only sibling did not attend my wedding because she didn't want to risk traveling while 7 months pregnant. I was disappointed, but I accepted it, of course.

She wasn’t just a guest - she was in the wedding and canceled the day of or night before. That’s incredibly inconsiderate since OP said the bride asked her multiple times if she would be able to be in her wedding and his wife said yes.

Also, she's only 16 weeks pregnant right now, which means she was less than that at the time of the wedding. So it's not like she was 7 months pregnant. Also, the traveling involved here was an hour.

[Anonymous]

The amount spent on the nursery seems on the higher end but not unreasonable. We only bought a crib and repurposed other furniture items in our home for the nursery), but if you are furnishing from scratch, it does cost a lot. Just be glad your wife is looking out for sales and jumping on them. And… you still need other big ticket items like the stroller, car seat, baby bouncer… and all this is pennies compared to the cost of childcare! Even if your wife does stay home, I imagine you’ll still need some part time help-cleaners and babysitters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP are you jealous? You sound it along w being resentful and petty. Actually childish. I feel for your wife.

OP here. I’m not jealous. I’m just annoyed that we can’t have proper communication and she is spending like crazy.

Your partner is a representation of you. When that partner starts canceling important things and you constantly have to make excuses for them, it looks bad on you.

For instance, we RSVP to an important wedding. She was in it and so was I. Last minute she decided she don’t want to make the trip ( 1 hour drive) and didn’t go. This made me look like a complete jerk and I had to keep making excuses of why she couldn’t be there.

You sound whiny about wedding. You don’t look like a jerk if you say Sonya is so tired from pregnancy she regrets she can’t make it. No one else cares but you it sounds. And “constantly?” She’s not be pregnant for that long. You sound thin skinned OP.

OP here. The bride was very upset. She was a bridesmaids and assured her many times throughout the pregnancy she would still be able to be her bridesmaids. She canceled the night before the wedding. They no longer talk. The friend has cut her out, which has also affected my relationship with her husband who was a good friend of mine.

If bride can’t understand that someone may need to cancel last minute for a sickness then that’s the bride’s issue.

She should have told her in advance. It sounds like OPs wife is an inconsiderate jerk.

DP. I disagree. The wife may have wanted to go, but felt unable at the last minute. I understand completely. It is not a big deal. My only sibling did not attend my wedding because she didn't want to risk traveling while 7 months pregnant. I was disappointed, but I accepted it, of course.

She wasn’t just a guest - she was in the wedding and canceled the day of or night before. That’s incredibly inconsiderate since OP said the bride asked her multiple times if she would be able to be in her wedding and his wife said yes.

Also, she's only 16 weeks pregnant right now, which means she was less than that at the time of the wedding. So it's not like she was 7 months pregnant. Also, the traveling involved here was an hour.

The travel can be 15 minutes and you can't make it because you feel like sh*t. The first trimester is the hardest across the board and for some women is especially brutal.