Husband doesn't help with hardly anything

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is pretty much a lot of husbands, they don’t do shit. They just sit there or do their own thing. Women put up with it.

I saw one dad at the aquarium taking everyone to the bathroom and getting them snacks and water bottles. He was so different so yeah there are a few good dads out there, but not many.

My husband is like this. I’m not saying it to brag. I just figured most men were deeply involved with their home and children so when I hear that some men do nothing, it’s kind of shocking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is pretty much a lot of husbands, they don’t do shit. They just sit there or do their own thing. Women put up with it.

I saw one dad at the aquarium taking everyone to the bathroom and getting them snacks and water bottles. He was so different so yeah there are a few good dads out there, but not many.

So a Disney Dad?

What is a Disney dad?

Only does the fun stuff. Like movie nights, dinner out, disney trips, once a week outings.

Never does the 24/7 raising the children stuff. Like disciplining, teaching, clothes or food shopping/meal planning, health issues, tutoring/lessons, teaching & enforcing chores, talking with teachers/families/coaches, teaching good manners & habits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is pretty much a lot of husbands, they don’t do shit. They just sit there or do their own thing. Women put up with it.

I saw one dad at the aquarium taking everyone to the bathroom and getting them snacks and water bottles. He was so different so yeah there are a few good dads out there, but not many.

So a Disney Dad?

What is a Disney dad?

Only does the fun stuff. Like movie nights, dinner out, disney trips, once a week outings.

Never does the 24/7 raising the children stuff. Like disciplining, teaching, clothes or food shopping/meal planning, health issues, tutoring/lessons, teaching & enforcing chores, talking with teachers/families/coaches, teaching good manners & habits.

Oooh my BIL is like this (SIL’s husband). Wants to interact with his kids only when they are photo-ready. None of the hard stuff. Can’t get over his disappointment that his son is terrible at sports whereas his daughter is a tomboy instead of a pretty princess

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is pretty much a lot of husbands, they don’t do shit. They just sit there or do their own thing. Women put up with it.

I saw one dad at the aquarium taking everyone to the bathroom and getting them snacks and water bottles. He was so different so yeah there are a few good dads out there, but not many.

My husband is like this. I’m not saying it to brag. I just figured most men were deeply involved with their home and children so when I hear that some men do nothing, it’s kind of shocking.

Lol.

Half the families we hang out with, it becomes VERY apparent the dad has no idea what is going on with their own kids, the schools, the sports team, their friends, etc.

It gets to the point they just laugh it off and try to brag about it.

But yeah, they’ll make an appearance at a weekend bday party or trip to the ice cream shop if it’s convenient for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is pretty much a lot of husbands, they don’t do shit. They just sit there or do their own thing. Women put up with it.

I saw one dad at the aquarium taking everyone to the bathroom and getting them snacks and water bottles. He was so different so yeah there are a few good dads out there, but not many.

So a Disney Dad?

What is a Disney dad?

Only does the fun stuff. Like movie nights, dinner out, disney trips, once a week outings.

Never does the 24/7 raising the children stuff. Like disciplining, teaching, clothes or food shopping/meal planning, health issues, tutoring/lessons, teaching & enforcing chores, talking with teachers/families/coaches, teaching good manners & habits.

Oooh my BIL is like this (SIL’s husband). Wants to interact with his kids only when they are photo-ready. None of the hard stuff. Can’t get over his disappointment that his son is terrible at sports whereas his daughter is a tomboy instead of a pretty princess

Or like my husband that only "showed up" when the parenting was almost done and all the kids were late teens (except my youngest who he rarely interacts with). Now he acts like he's been this great father all along and it infuriates me.

[Anonymous]

Mine ignores everyone most of the week and the. Wants to eat out all weekend and post photos of him being a 5 minute family man.

[Anonymous]

This sums it up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is pretty much a lot of husbands, they don’t do shit. They just sit there or do their own thing. Women put up with it.

I saw one dad at the aquarium taking everyone to the bathroom and getting them snacks and water bottles. He was so different so yeah there are a few good dads out there, but not many.

So a Disney Dad?

What is a Disney dad?

Only does the fun stuff. Like movie nights, dinner out, disney trips, once a week outings.

Never does the 24/7 raising the children stuff. Like disciplining, teaching, clothes or food shopping/meal planning, health issues, tutoring/lessons, teaching & enforcing chores, talking with teachers/families/coaches, teaching good manners & habits.

OP here. YES, this! I literally told my husband that he gets to be the fun one. He will take her to the movies, the park, the mall, etc. while I'm catching up on chores or just plain exhausted from having driven all over the metro area between work and her activities. It's super frustrating.

[Anonymous]

OP, this thread has gone on for 11 pages. What are you going to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I WOH full time+ in a demanding job. DH WFH full time+ in a demanding job. We make very similar incomes. However, I am the primary parent to our DD, capital P. All of the mental load and most of actual labor too, both household and parenting. He loves to criticize how I do all of it, meanwhile I don't think he moved from the couch in 10 hours yesterday, surfing the internet and playing video games. We'd just had a long conversation about how overwhelmed I am and I need more help and that's how he responds. I lost my sh*t on him because there was a giant pile of laundry to be put away, meanwhile I'm simultaneously cooking and helping DD with homework. He responded by telling me how miserable I make things around the house and basically what a drag it is to participate in anything in regards to parenting or around the house.

I can't handle it anymore. I told him my life would probably be easier if I was single because there would be less mess and life would just be more easy going. I'm already doing 98% of everything, the 2% or so he does participate in is not worth the hassle. I was late to work today because DD was having a tantrum not being able to find something and he just laid in bed. DD has to wake him up most days to make sure he gets her to the bus on time (that's one of his few contributions). He thinks I'm overreacting being upset that an 8 year old has to wake up her own father most days.

Sorry, I know I'm rambling, but I'm just so upset right now. I don't know how to get him to hear me and how to get us out of this awful cycle we are in.

It is divorce time. No suggestions. Your husband is lazy, inconsiderate, a bad husband and a bad parent. Get out.