Why do kids seem to be driving later than they used to "back in the day"?

[Anonymous]

Cars ain’t cheap and neither is car insurance. That said my d got a drivers license at 17 but didn’t do much driving until much later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What are your thoughts on the trend of kids waiting to get their licenses--and the common feeling of reluctance that a lot of kids seem to have about driving?

I was one of the few kids I knew who did not get a license at age 16 (back in the 1990s). For me, the reason was straight-up anxiety. I was very fixated on the appearance of being perfect and I couldn't handle the idea of doing a driving training with other kids from school who would see me learning at something.

A lot less was understood about anxiety then, my experience with it now (and my stance as a parent) is that if my kid was anxious about driving I would provide more support and coping skills but I would not let them avoid driving. IME, avoiding something makes that stress/anxiety build up about it and it becomes harder to surmount later.

Are kids today more anxious in general? Or is it because so much socializing can be done online, so there's less of a pull to be out and about on your own? Or is it somewhat parent-influenced, because I do think parents are more anxious than they seemed to be when I was growing up.

I was inspired to post this because another parenting group I am on had people talking about driving their kids to COLLEGE (because the kids didn't want licenses) and that really got me thinking.

I drove my kid to college. They aren’t taking my car to college or keeping it on campus. Your point?

[Anonymous]

If it's monetary, then it's the parents not kids who are the delay?

My kids are ready to drive when legal. They will take it slow, HS and practices only few miles away.
It's a good life skill; and I prefer they learn and practice with us before they are off to college.

[Anonymous]

DD refused to learn to drive for a while no matter what and then the early spring before college she had an impetus to do it. At that point she begged to get her license out of the way and did pass it on her first try right before going to college. She is still pretty terrified of driving but is glad she has a form of ID and plans to settle somewhere with great public transport.

[Anonymous]

Kids are infantilized now and 16 is about what 20 was for us.

[Anonymous]

Uber. Amazon Prime. Doordash. FaceTime. Online games.

Etc

[Anonymous]

Parents are on alert re: driving dangers and the danger of riding with a new driver when the driver is 16-17, but expect the driver to have experience (or mention that they don't!) if they are closer to 20.

Don't put your passengers at risk. If you/your child has had a unique timeline re: driving experience, everyone needs to know so they can make an informed decision

[Anonymous]

Part of the problem is too many teens are sitting in the back seats of cars. I made my kids start sitting in the front seat at 12. I point out things to watch out for, driving tips, I make them navigate at times, etc. At 14 1/2 we started going to empty driving lots a few weekends and they start driving at really low speeds and practice parking. By 15 1/2 they have no problem practicing driving on the streets with us.

[Anonymous]

With all the great safety features and gadgets (backup cams, parallel parking automatically, etc) cars practically drive itself. I, too, am surprised why my teen isn't more eager to get her DL. Way easier now than it was "back in the day" for me.

[Anonymous]

My kid got a learner's permit only to take his SAT when tests were being cancelled. No desire to drive. Happy to hear that many others are in same shoes.

[Anonymous]

My kid was almost 18 when he got his license, necessitated by a summer job he needed to drive to. Before that, he walked to most things or occasionally took a Lyft (which I preferred anyway for get-togethers with friends where there might be drinking.) And as others have mentioned: the car insurance is damned expensive.

[Anonymous]

My 15 year old just got her learner's permit. I see the same issue with the anxiety. She was anxious before that test, anxious before the first parking lot driving lesson. I definitely didn't want to postpone it because I don't think it will make her anxiety go away. It definitely worked - she's been less anxious on future parking lot driving lessons after she got the first one under her belt. Part of the reason I didn't want her to wait - it's just easier to get it down with.

Maybe us parents are just super cool these days and our kids aren't embarrassed to be driven by us. Yeah, the more I think about it, the more I believe that is the correct answer. Us parents are just super cool.

[Anonymous]

Driving is a lot harder and more anxiety provoking than 30 years ago, especially if you live in a large metro area. Cars and insurance are also a whole lot cheaper and it's not like kids can afford to buy one and insure it with a part time or summer job like they used to do years ago. Wages haven't kept up.

[Anonymous]

My 16-year old is getting his on time, but most kids are neighborhood don’t. It’s a very busy, urban neighborhood. Pretty scary place for new drivers.

A lot of the reason was it was easy to do the online course during Covid and he could get in behind the wheel. Once school ramps up in 2 weeks and sports, it would be hard for him to find the time.

Kids walk, bike and take Metro in our neighborhood and so much is close, food, movie theaters, etc., driving isn’t necessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 16-year old is getting his on time, but most kids are neighborhood don’t. It’s a very busy, urban neighborhood. Pretty scary place for new drivers.

A lot of the reason was it was easy to do the online course during Covid and he could get in behind the wheel. Once school ramps up in 2 weeks and sports, it would be hard for him to find the time.

Kids walk, bike and take Metro in our neighborhood and so much is close, food, movie theaters, etc., driving isn’t necessary.

I want to say I was floored at how much more involved it is for kids to get a license than it was for me in the 80s. I grew up in Fairfax Co and only took a written test and drove around the block and presto: license. Today it’s, parent class, classroom for kid, multiple tests and 40 hours drive time. This is by no means bad, it’s a good thing!, just not as easy to fit it all in.