Rude or not?

[Anonymous]

Sure. It’s not like you’re other time is dictated by anyone else. Treat it like a work trip where you would attend the conference or whatever by yourself and then sightsee with your partner at other times. Not sure why this is a question

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
1. I would not go, as the nation will be firmly in the grip of Delta this fall.

2. But where it not for the pandemic, I would just ask if they accept a plus one, and note that it's fine if they refuse. If they refuse, he can join you on the non-wedding times. No hurt feelings on either side.

Oh my god, OP do NOT do the bolded! That would be incredibly rude and tacky. The appropriate thing to do is spend the weekend with the other invited wedding guests. Take two extra days AFTER the wedding is over, have your boyfriend fly out to join you AFTER all the wedding festivities are over and explore THEN.

Do you realize you “sound” hysterical and angry? There is no call for such a strongly worded post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
1. I would not go, as the nation will be firmly in the grip of Delta this fall.

2. But where it not for the pandemic, I would just ask if they accept a plus one, and note that it's fine if they refuse. If they refuse, he can join you on the non-wedding times. No hurt feelings on either side.

Oh my god, OP do NOT do the bolded! That would be incredibly rude and tacky. The appropriate thing to do is spend the weekend with the other invited wedding guests. Take two extra days AFTER the wedding is over, have your boyfriend fly out to join you AFTER all the wedding festivities are over and explore THEN.

Do you realize you “sound” hysterical and angry? There is no call for such a strongly worded post.

The PP does not sound "hysterical." Poster is absolutely right! Manners and politeness and the rules of such have gotten diminished in recent generations. Grown adults in society should not even approach this possibility of asking for a +1 to such an event. It's simply rude and impolite - a big no no! Manners may seem stupid to the younger generations - but they are so very very important. I think it is often the people who think it is ok to ask such things are the same people who have never organized and paid for a wedding or any other large event. They've never been in the position of hosting and most likely never will.

[Anonymous]

Not rude at all to bring your boyfriend to explore the city.

Not rude at all for the couple not to provide a plus one to a boyfriend, either, especially if it's a small wedding. It's only rude if some plus one's for non-marrieds are allowed and not others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - of course I wouldn’t ask the bride/groom to include my bf. But again it’s a city we’re both interested in seeing and I figure I’m paying for the hotel anyway, why not have him come along.

Definitely bring him.

Definitely bring him...just don't make it a big deal so that the bride/groom or their families feel badly that they could not include him. As someone else pointed out, you were invited for an event that has a finite amount of time, like 4-5 hours max, and then the rest of the time is your own. Your boyfriend surely is mature enough that he can be on his own for 4-5 hours without you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
1. I would not go, as the nation will be firmly in the grip of Delta this fall.

2. But where it not for the pandemic, I would just ask if they accept a plus one, and note that it's fine if they refuse. If they refuse, he can join you on the non-wedding times. No hurt feelings on either side.

Oh my god, OP do NOT do the bolded! That would be incredibly rude and tacky. The appropriate thing to do is spend the weekend with the other invited wedding guests. Take two extra days AFTER the wedding is over, have your boyfriend fly out to join you AFTER all the wedding festivities are over and explore THEN.

Do you realize you “sound” hysterical and angry? There is no call for such a strongly worded post.

The PP does not sound "hysterical." Poster is absolutely right! Manners and politeness and the rules of such have gotten diminished in recent generations. Grown adults in society should not even approach this possibility of asking for a +1 to such an event. It's simply rude and impolite - a big no no! Manners may seem stupid to the younger generations - but they are so very very important. I think it is often the people who think it is ok to ask such things are the same people who have never organized and paid for a wedding or any other large event. They've never been in the position of hosting and most likely never will.

+1 for your response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
1. I would not go, as the nation will be firmly in the grip of Delta this fall.

2. But where it not for the pandemic, I would just ask if they accept a plus one, and note that it's fine if they refuse. If they refuse, he can join you on the non-wedding times. No hurt feelings on either side.

Oh my god, OP do NOT do the bolded! That would be incredibly rude and tacky. The appropriate thing to do is spend the weekend with the other invited wedding guests. Take two extra days AFTER the wedding is over, have your boyfriend fly out to join you AFTER all the wedding festivities are over and explore THEN.

Do you realize you “sound” hysterical and angry? There is no call for such a strongly worded post.

The PP does not sound "hysterical." Poster is absolutely right! Manners and politeness and the rules of such have gotten diminished in recent generations. Grown adults in society should not even approach this possibility of asking for a +1 to such an event. It's simply rude and impolite - a big no no! Manners may seem stupid to the younger generations - but they are so very very important. I think it is often the people who think it is ok to ask such things are the same people who have never organized and paid for a wedding or any other large event. They've never been in the position of hosting and most likely never will.

+1 for your response.

I’m stuck on the PPs who think the right thing to do is “s pend the weekend with the other invited wedding guests.” What??? There is no need as an adult to force yourself to spend time with people you don’t want to outside of traditional wedding activities. If I’m go to a wedding I don’t know most people at, I certainly don’t seek them out.

[Anonymous]

I would bring him and go to the wedding alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
1. I would not go, as the nation will be firmly in the grip of Delta this fall.

2. But where it not for the pandemic, I would just ask if they accept a plus one, and note that it's fine if they refuse. If they refuse, he can join you on the non-wedding times. No hurt feelings on either side.

Oh my god, OP do NOT do the bolded! That would be incredibly rude and tacky. The appropriate thing to do is spend the weekend with the other invited wedding guests. Take two extra days AFTER the wedding is over, have your boyfriend fly out to join you AFTER all the wedding festivities are over and explore THEN.

Do you realize you “sound” hysterical and angry? There is no call for such a strongly worded post.

The PP does not sound "hysterical." Poster is absolutely right! Manners and politeness and the rules of such have gotten diminished in recent generations. Grown adults in society should not even approach this possibility of asking for a +1 to such an event. It's simply rude and impolite - a big no no! Manners may seem stupid to the younger generations - but they are so very very important. I think it is often the people who think it is ok to ask such things are the same people who have never organized and paid for a wedding or any other large event. They've never been in the position of hosting and most likely never will.

I am OP and I (a) will not ask for my boyfriend to attend and (b) am divorced, therefore have organized, paid for, and hosted a wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s rude to invite a grown adult to a wedding without a +1.

I would just decline.

I agree. Adults need a plus one. I'm so glad I'm out of the wedding stage of life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s rude to invite a grown adult to a wedding without a +1.

I would just decline.

I agree. Adults need a plus one. I'm so glad I'm out of the wedding stage of life.

No, they don't. THe fact that you think you are entitled to bring a random stranger to someone's wedding, at their cost, says a lot about you, your manners, lack of self awareness, and how you were raised. Hint: none of it is goodl

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - of course I wouldn’t ask the bride/groom to include my bf. But again it’s a city we’re both interested in seeing and I figure I’m paying for the hotel anyway, why not have him come along.

Definitely bring him.

+1 The bride and groom do not care what you are doing in your spare time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s rude to invite a grown adult to a wedding without a +1.

I would just decline.

I agree. Adults need a plus one. I'm so glad I'm out of the wedding stage of life.

No, they don't. THe fact that you think you are entitled to bring a random stranger to someone's wedding, at their cost, says a lot about you, your manners, lack of self awareness, and how you were raised. Hint: none of it is goodl

It's bad manners ,pp, adults gat a +1, bride is rude and if you did this at your wedding it was rude.

[Anonymous]

I would bring him too, as long as he is ok with not going to the events and not making a big deal or whining that he is not going to the events. Most guys really won't care. Not rude, as he won't be attending.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
1. I would not go, as the nation will be firmly in the grip of Delta this fall.

2. But where it not for the pandemic, I would just ask if they accept a plus one, and note that it's fine if they refuse. If they refuse, he can join you on the non-wedding times. No hurt feelings on either side.

Oh my god, OP do NOT do the bolded! That would be incredibly rude and tacky. The appropriate thing to do is spend the weekend with the other invited wedding guests. Take two extra days AFTER the wedding is over, have your boyfriend fly out to join you AFTER all the wedding festivities are over and explore THEN.

Do you realize you “sound” hysterical and angry? There is no call for such a strongly worded post.

The PP does not sound "hysterical." Poster is absolutely right! Manners and politeness and the rules of such have gotten diminished in recent generations. Grown adults in society should not even approach this possibility of asking for a +1 to such an event. It's simply rude and impolite - a big no no! Manners may seem stupid to the younger generations - but they are so very very important. I think it is often the people who think it is ok to ask such things are the same people who have never organized and paid for a wedding or any other large event. They've never been in the position of hosting and most likely never will.

You both sound "a little off" since we're scare quoting everything to make ourselves feel witty. OP never even suggested asking for another invite so to go off the rails attacking like this is pretty out there.