My husband won't let me do anything with the kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you and the CDC can't convince him, it's unlikely DCUM can, either.

It's odd that he's OK with daycare, but not the grocery store, though. Can he explain the disconnect?

Probably one is a necessary risk and the other is not.

I'd argue they are both necessary. We have to work.

Daycare is necessary. Presumably the grocery store is not.

Get a grip. Most of the country has been grocery shopping for months and community spread is negligible in most places. Cases among kids are not a thing now. Do you allow your child to ride in a car? Eat grapes? Both are many many times more likely to kill them.

I cut grapes up for my kids and they always wear seatbelts and had car seats when age appropriate. I wouldn’t take a kid to a grocery store. It just isn’t necessary. My kids did attend in person school all year. I judge activities based on usefulness. Eating indoors and grocery shopping are not necessary, so my kids won’t do them until they are vaccinated.

OMG that is insane - you aren't letting them eat indoors or do basic errands until they are vaccinated? What if it takes years for them to get vaccinated? You know kids learn a lot of things about how life works by doing mundane chores and errands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is no way I would take a baby or toddler to eat indoors or go to an indoor pool right now.

Outdoor pool? Yes.
Get takeout or eat outdoors? Yes

You are a small minority at this point given community spread is essentially non existent in the dmv.

[Anonymous]

I’m pretty lenient but am not doing things you describe.
My kids played spring sports, are in camp, we have had people over for dinner and play dates.

I’m still not eating indoors with my little kids - why not eat outside?
I am not taking my kids into stores - are errands with a toddler and preschooler even enjoyable?

Why do you need to go to an outdoor pool when there are splash pads and outdoor pools?

None of those things are for the kids. They are for you. Why don’t you focus on what they would enjoy and find a safe way to do it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you and the CDC can't convince him, it's unlikely DCUM can, either.

It's odd that he's OK with daycare, but not the grocery store, though. Can he explain the disconnect?

Probably one is a necessary risk and the other is not.

I'd argue they are both necessary. We have to work.

Daycare is necessary. Presumably the grocery store is not.

Get a grip. Most of the country has been grocery shopping for months and community spread is negligible in most places. Cases among kids are not a thing now. Do you allow your child to ride in a car? Eat grapes? Both are many many times more likely to kill them.

I cut grapes up for my kids and they always wear seatbelts and had car seats when age appropriate. I wouldn’t take a kid to a grocery store. It just isn’t necessary. My kids did attend in person school all year. I judge activities based on usefulness. Eating indoors and grocery shopping are not necessary, so my kids won’t do them until they are vaccinated.

OMG that is insane - you aren't letting them eat indoors or do basic errands until they are vaccinated? What if it takes years for them to get vaccinated? You know kids learn a lot of things about how life works by doing mundane chores and errands.

DP, but similar. (Kid eats indoors at daycare, of course.) And yeah, daycare is the biggest risk, and it is an absolute necessity for our family. Also he loves it and learns a lot there. During the height of the pandemic, the "risk budget" concept was promoted by some. We use all of our risk on daycare, so we didn't want to incur additional less necessary risks. You don't say 'kids are in daycare, so that means we can do whatever!", it is really the opposite.

The grocery store? Meh. He'll learn about that eventually, and we sometimes do outdoor errands (non crowded farmers market, outdoor ice cream stop, garden store). I don't really WANT to take my toddler to most errands, our even really to a restaurant. My kid also doesn't care about that much either.

Caveat, I am basically expecting vaccinations for 2-12 late this fall, though. If it turns out it is years away or not happening, I'll change my approach soon enough. I'm also quite optimistic that this delta variant is not going to be a big scary thing in the US, but we'll know for sure in just a month or two.

And actually, I personally am mostly OK with doing some limited indoor things now if I needed/wanted to, but my DH wants to wait, and that seems fine to me.

[Anonymous]

OP here - I never mentioned the grocery store...don't know how that came about. We started getting our groceries delivered and will never stop. I look back at when we had our first baby and how much resistance DH gave then to going out. So I think COVID is just an excuse for him to stay home. Maybe this is a DH problem...

I'd like to address the vaccine. The baby won't be able to get it for another 6+ months when she is two. Also, it's like a million degrees outside and we don't take well to the heat, I'd rather eat inside.

[Anonymous]

You talked about running errands, substitute whatever indoor errand you have for "grocery store".

If you don't think it is worth waiting for a vaccine (a valid stance, but his POV is also valid), you need to talk about what risks you are really avoiding by staying home. The COVID risks to kids is very very small.

Sure, this may be a mismatch in "wanting to go out" levels between you and DH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I never mentioned the grocery store...don't know how that came about. We started getting our groceries delivered and will never stop. I look back at when we had our first baby and how much resistance DH gave then to going out. So I think COVID is just an excuse for him to stay home. Maybe this is a DH problem...

I'd like to address the vaccine. The baby won't be able to get it for another 6+ months when she is two. Also, it's like a million degrees outside and we don't take well to the heat, I'd rather eat inside.

I am super liberal and have been eating inside for months. You are more likely to get food poisoning than COVID at this point. Do not listen to the COVID crazies. They have severe anxiety disorders and cannot assess risk rationally.

And just to say it again--even with a seat belt/the best carseat you can buy, your kid is MUCH more likely to die in a car accident than from COVID. Also to drown. So, stay home if you are worried about car accidents or drowning so much so that you can't leave the house. COVID is like a boogeyman for loonies at this stage in the game.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I never mentioned the grocery store...don't know how that came about. We started getting our groceries delivered and will never stop. I look back at when we had our first baby and how much resistance DH gave then to going out. So I think COVID is just an excuse for him to stay home. Maybe this is a DH problem...

I'd like to address the vaccine. The baby won't be able to get it for another 6+ months when she is two. Also, it's like a million degrees outside and we don't take well to the heat, I'd rather eat inside.

I am super liberal and have been eating inside for months. You are more likely to get food poisoning than COVID at this point. Do not listen to the COVID crazies. They have severe anxiety disorders and cannot assess risk rationally.

And just to say it again--even with a seat belt/the best carseat you can buy, your kid is MUCH more likely to die in a car accident than from COVID. Also to drown. So, stay home if you are worried about car accidents or drowning so much so that you can't leave the house. COVID is like a boogeyman for loonies at this stage in the game.

Ok Karen.

[Anonymous]

Just start doing things with them, OP. He can't physically stop you.

You have a safe window in which to do things right now, but in a few months you'll need to be more careful because of the Delta wave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I am super liberal and have been eating inside for months. You are more likely to get food poisoning than COVID at this point. Do not listen to the COVID crazies. They have severe anxiety disorders and cannot assess risk rationally.

And just to say it again--even with a seat belt/the best carseat you can buy, your kid is MUCH more likely to die in a car accident than from COVID. Also to drown. So, stay home if you are worried about car accidents or drowning so much so that you can't leave the house. COVID is like a boogeyman for loonies at this stage in the game.

Most people know that driving/drowning is a larger death risk for kids. Still, many of us simply don't find an indoor pool or indoor restaurant (w/kids) compelling enough to add even the tiny amount of risk, when outdoor options exist, vaccines aren't far away, and yeah, some of us just want a little more time for COVID to get more squashed. There are TONS of outdoor options for kids that work fine for my family. I eat inside myself, but am not interested in taking my kids inside.

But I understand eating inside (w/kids) is compelling for some people, including OP, who do not like or have outdoor options. Fine, no problem. Only problem is that the husband either needs to get on the same page, or she needs to just accept that she's going to do things against his wishes.

[Anonymous]

We have 2 and 5.

Daycare? Yes because we need childcare help even we work from home and kids move it.

Indoor pool? No, and we have not tried outdoor splash park or pool yet.

Eat in restaurant? No, and we have not tried outdoor dinning. We have been doing carry out or drive through.

Grocery shopping? Once in a few month if deemed necessary because kids love to touch everything including the dirty shopping cart.

Outdoor play? We do, but we have stopped because it has been so hot outside.

Other stores? Yes, but once in a while, eg target or Best Buy and we but small random things, more like window shopping with air conditioning on.

Indoor playground? No, no, no! Especially those with ball pits, tunnel and my 2 year old still eats fingers.

[Anonymous]

I think some people got used to the hermit lifestyle during COVID and are having trouble coming back out into the world…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think some people got used to the hermit lifestyle during COVID and are having trouble coming back out into the world…

I socialize with other families (indoors and out), do normal stuff w/out my kids, and do mostly outdoor stuff w/kids (or with friends/family, just not random crowds). I'm really just not sure why eating in restaurants with kids is so important to society or my life. If you want to take your kids, great. But it isn't weird to reprioritize it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you and the CDC can't convince him, it's unlikely DCUM can, either.

It's odd that he's OK with daycare, but not the grocery store, though. Can he explain the disconnect?

Probably one is a necessary risk and the other is not.

I'd argue they are both necessary. We have to work.

Daycare is necessary. Presumably the grocery store is not.

Get a grip. Most of the country has been grocery shopping for months and community spread is negligible in most places. Cases among kids are not a thing now. Do you allow your child to ride in a car? Eat grapes? Both are many many times more likely to kill them.

I cut grapes up for my kids and they always wear seatbelts and had car seats when age appropriate. I wouldn’t take a kid to a grocery store. It just isn’t necessary. My kids did attend in person school all year. I judge activities based on usefulness. Eating indoors and grocery shopping are not necessary, so my kids won’t do them until they are vaccinated.

That’s still not rational considering the extremely low risk in the DC area.

[Anonymous]

Man, it was great visiting family in Texas a couple of weeks ago. You realize what an anomaly this area is in regards to masking when it's unnecessary.