"You Make Me Feel Like I Can't Live in my Own House"

Anonymous
Call me petty, but the wet towel and used dental floss would be placed on his pillow. Call the handyman and have timers placed on your light switches so they will go off within a time limit.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How would you react to a Spouse that constantly uses the phrase above anytime you ask them to do simple courteous things like:

- turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- hang wet towels instead of throwing them on the bed
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher
- refill the Brita when they empty it
- empty the trash when its full instead of smashing more in until the bag breaks
- leaves used dental floss in the shower
- doesn't replace TP when emptied


And a gazillion other examples of generally being an extremely selfish housemate.


depends on how tight finances are, but this are weird to me:

turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher

Things that should be adjusted:
Wet towels —> only if the beddding gets wet, otherwise who cares
TP/floss -> yep
Trash —> try setting the trash bags right next to the can and see if a visual cue helps. One stuff is fine, bag break is not
Brita—> have spouse buy one that screws on to the sink. Takes the problem away.


Agree with this. This was a mishmash of stuff OP should have let go of long ago and actual rudeness.


Nope. Brita on faucet never gets the water cold. Wet towel on bed is disgusting. Who wants wet sheets? Don't even get me started on the floss. That's repulsive. Only thing worse is what a coworker once told me. He was dating a girl who'd remove used tampons in the shower and just kick them into the corner for the duration of her period.
Anonymous
I would listen to my spouse and lay off the nagging.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How would you react to a Spouse that constantly uses the phrase above anytime you ask them to do simple courteous things like:

- turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- hang wet towels instead of throwing them on the bed
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher
- refill the Brita when they empty it
- empty the trash when its full instead of smashing more in until the bag breaks
- leaves used dental floss in the shower
- doesn't replace TP when emptied


And a gazillion other examples of generally being an extremely selfish housemate.


depends on how tight finances are, but this are weird to me:

turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher

Things that should be adjusted:
Wet towels —> only if the beddding gets wet, otherwise who cares
TP/floss -> yep
Trash —> try setting the trash bags right next to the can and see if a visual cue helps. One stuff is fine, bag break is not
Brita—> have spouse buy one that screws on to the sink. Takes the problem away.


Agree with this. This was a mishmash of stuff OP should have let go of long ago and actual rudeness.


Nope. Brita on faucet never gets the water cold. Wet towel on bed is disgusting. Who wants wet sheets? Don't even get me started on the floss. That's repulsive. Only thing worse is what a coworker once told me. He was dating a girl who'd remove used tampons in the shower and just kick them into the corner for the duration of her period.


I don’t know why you started your post with “nope.” Obviously you’re right about those things. But letting the sink run?? Who cares?!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How would you react to a Spouse that constantly uses the phrase above anytime you ask them to do simple courteous things like:

- turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- hang wet towels instead of throwing them on the bed
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher
- refill the Brita when they empty it
- empty the trash when its full instead of smashing more in until the bag breaks
- leaves used dental floss in the shower
- doesn't replace TP when emptied


And a gazillion other examples of generally being an extremely selfish housemate.


depends on how tight finances are, but this are weird to me:

turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher

Things that should be adjusted:
Wet towels —> only if the beddding gets wet, otherwise who cares
TP/floss -> yep
Trash —> try setting the trash bags right next to the can and see if a visual cue helps. One stuff is fine, bag break is not
Brita—> have spouse buy one that screws on to the sink. Takes the problem away.


Agree with this. This was a mishmash of stuff OP should have let go of long ago and actual rudeness.


Nope. Brita on faucet never gets the water cold. Wet towel on bed is disgusting. Who wants wet sheets? Don't even get me started on the floss. That's repulsive. Only thing worse is what a coworker once told me. He was dating a girl who'd remove used tampons in the shower and just kick them into the corner for the duration of her period.


That's disgusting and not at all comparable to any of the examples given by the OP.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How would you react to a Spouse that constantly uses the phrase above anytime you ask them to do simple courteous things like:

- turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- hang wet towels instead of throwing them on the bed
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher
- refill the Brita when they empty it
- empty the trash when its full instead of smashing more in until the bag breaks
- leaves used dental floss in the shower
- doesn't replace TP when emptied


And a gazillion other examples of generally being an extremely selfish housemate.


depends on how tight finances are, but this are weird to me:

turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher

Things that should be adjusted:
Wet towels —> only if the beddding gets wet, otherwise who cares
TP/floss -> yep
Trash —> try setting the trash bags right next to the can and see if a visual cue helps. One stuff is fine, bag break is not
Brita—> have spouse buy one that screws on to the sink. Takes the problem away.


Agree with this. This was a mishmash of stuff OP should have let go of long ago and actual rudeness.


Nope. Brita on faucet never gets the water cold. Wet towel on bed is disgusting. Who wants wet sheets? Don't even get me started on the floss. That's repulsive. Only thing worse is what a coworker once told me. He was dating a girl who'd remove used tampons in the shower and just kick them into the corner for the duration of her period.


I don’t know why you started your post with “nope.” Obviously you’re right about those things. But letting the sink run?? Who cares?!


DP, but I can tell you why its an issue for me. We are in a climate crisis. Wasting water and resources is irresponsible steward ship of the 1 planet we have. There is no where else to go. We have to stop destroying this one. And I'm raising my kids to know this so you bet we dont waste water or electricty!
Anonymous
I’d be annoyed if I was constantly reminded to turn the lights off when I leave a room. I like to have lights on when I’m in the house.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I would listen to my spouse and lay off the nagging.



+1 Only a small number of things on your list are even worth discussing, OP. Sounds like you're always harping on him about something.

DH and I disagree about lights on/off but have reached a middle ground where we leave lights on in rooms where we spend the bulk of our time per his preference (kitchen, family room), and turn off the rest. If he forgets, I'll turn them off but don't mention it. I periodically remind all family members to try not to run the water too long (our water bill has doubled in the past year), but again don't make a federal case of it. So much of it is frequency and tone.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Some of that stuff you can let go, OP. Like running the water while loading the dishwasher. Pick your battles.


+1.

My ex used to sing Rihanna All of the Lights when I was guilty of leaving every light on.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How would you react to a Spouse that constantly uses the phrase above anytime you ask them to do simple courteous things like:

- turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- hang wet towels instead of throwing them on the bed
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher
- refill the Brita when they empty it
- empty the trash when its full instead of smashing more in until the bag breaks
- leaves used dental floss in the shower
- doesn't replace TP when emptied


And a gazillion other examples of generally being an extremely selfish housemate.


depends on how tight finances are, but this are weird to me:

turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher

Things that should be adjusted:
Wet towels —> only if the beddding gets wet, otherwise who cares
TP/floss -> yep
Trash —> try setting the trash bags right next to the can and see if a visual cue helps. One stuff is fine, bag break is not
Brita—> have spouse buy one that screws on to the sink. Takes the problem away.


Agree with this. This was a mishmash of stuff OP should have let go of long ago and actual rudeness.


Nope. Brita on faucet never gets the water cold. Wet towel on bed is disgusting. Who wants wet sheets? Don't even get me started on the floss. That's repulsive. Only thing worse is what a coworker once told me. He was dating a girl who'd remove used tampons in the shower and just kick them into the corner for the duration of her period.


I don’t know why you started your post with “nope.” Obviously you’re right about those things. But letting the sink run?? Who cares?!


DP, but I can tell you why its an issue for me. We are in a climate crisis. Wasting water and resources is irresponsible steward ship of the 1 planet we have. There is no where else to go. We have to stop destroying this one. And I'm raising my kids to know this so you bet we dont waste water or electricty!


Oh please. Educate yourself on water tables. And how Germany “preserved” their water into a different water crisis.
Anonymous
I probably wouldn't be as polite as your dh. I'd let you know that you are a controlling nit picking pain in the a$$.
Anonymous
Well OP.

My spouse does several of the things on your list and I've been happily married for 17 years.

You need to pick your battles, get a sense of humor, let some things go, and figure out what's important to you.

You can certainly live alone the rest of your life and ensure that all the lights are off as you'd like them and all the doors are closed in the summer though. Envision that and see if it's worth it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:How would you react to a Spouse that constantly uses the phrase above anytime you ask them to do simple courteous things like:

- turn off the lights when they leave a room
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- hang wet towels instead of throwing them on the bed
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher
- refill the Brita when they empty it
- empty the trash when its full instead of smashing more in until the bag breaks
- leaves used dental floss in the shower
- doesn't replace TP when emptied


And a gazillion other examples of generally being an extremely selfish housemate.


Do people do this one? I'm guessing the logic has something to do with A/C?

The kitchen sink running while filling the dishwasher and turning off lights when they leave a room...also both over the top. I get it, and also let it go.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How would you react to a Spouse that constantly uses the phrase above anytime you ask them to do simple courteous things like:

- turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- hang wet towels instead of throwing them on the bed
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher
- refill the Brita when they empty it
- empty the trash when its full instead of smashing more in until the bag breaks
- leaves used dental floss in the shower
- doesn't replace TP when emptied


And a gazillion other examples of generally being an extremely selfish housemate.


depends on how tight finances are, but this are weird to me:

turn off the lights when they leave a room —
- close the doors during the middle of summer
- not leave the kitchen sink just running while they fill the dishwasher

Things that should be adjusted:
Wet towels —> only if the beddding gets wet, otherwise who cares
TP/floss -> yep
Trash —> try setting the trash bags right next to the can and see if a visual cue helps. One stuff is fine, bag break is not
Brita—> have spouse buy one that screws on to the sink. Takes the problem away.


Agree with this. This was a mishmash of stuff OP should have let go of long ago and actual rudeness.


Nope. Brita on faucet never gets the water cold. Wet towel on bed is disgusting. Who wants wet sheets? Don't even get me started on the floss. That's repulsive. Only thing worse is what a coworker once told me. He was dating a girl who'd remove used tampons in the shower and just kick them into the corner for the duration of her period.


I don’t know why you started your post with “nope.” Obviously you’re right about those things. But letting the sink run?? Who cares?!


DP, but I can tell you why its an issue for me. We are in a climate crisis. Wasting water and resources is irresponsible steward ship of the 1 planet we have. There is no where else to go. We have to stop destroying this one. And I'm raising my kids to know this so you bet we dont waste water or electricty!


(silently thanks the sweet Lord am not married to this person)
Anonymous
He's disrespecting you on a daily basis. I'd toss his butt to the curb.I'm a princess and deserve the treatment I command
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