My husband is a horrible person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be upset if the kids were like 5 years old but I don’t see how either two scenarios with teens is a problem to be upset about. I mean, he should keep the leaf blower and never use it? Force himself to eat the peas when I am sure the kids knew he doesn’t like peas?

^^PP, take a seat. You are not helping anything with this answer.

[Anonymous]

My MIL is like this. I stopped getting her gifts.

[Anonymous]

As a dad, this kind of breaks my heart. And I’m not super emotional either. Poor kid. I do think they’ll be fine, though, and don’t subscribe to this idea that everything bad in life creates some insurmountable trauma. They will grow up knowing their father is a emotionless prick, impossible to please, honest/critical to a fault, etc. Plenty of people who achieve great things and turn out happy and well adjusted have to learn to get over things like this. Hopefully he shows them fleeting glimpses of love and connection that they can hold on to. But yeah, it sucks and he’s an asshole. Probably has a lot of pain of his own that he picked up along the way.

Just make sure they know their mom loves them without condition.

[Anonymous]

Your kids are awesome, OP. Hug them tight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wrote this post a couple weeks ago, about my son making us a casserole with peas and my husband eating it standing at the sink so he could spit the peas directly into the sink (he doesn't like peas.)
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/886435.page

I have another son, who has a job this summer working at a big box home improvement store. He doesn't have his own car, so usually I (or my husband) will drop him off/pick him up.
Today when I picked him up, he looked really happy and excited and was carrying a leaf blower. He told me he had bought it for my husband for father's day. In all honesty, my husband doesn't really have use for a leaf blower...but still, that's really sweet, right?

So after dinner my son went to his room, got the leaf blower, and came into the room where Dh was watching tv. My son was singing "happy father's day" to the tune of "happy birthday." Dh just sat on the couch and said "what am I going to do with a leaf blower?" That's a total D--- thing to say to your kid, right?

Son ended up bringing the leaf blower out to the shed a few mintues later.
Son is now asleep (he has to work at 7 am tomorrow) and I asked Dh if he talked with son about it. And he was still just a jerk "Well, he caught me off guard."

I'm just....upset.

You need to get some perspective.

[Anonymous]

Sounds exactly like my father. I only have a relationship with him because I feel like I have to. I feel guilty. But those comments stick and they hurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds exactly like my father. I only have a relationship with him because I feel like I have to. I feel guilty. But those comments stick and they hurt.

You have no obligation to maintain a relationship with him. You know that right?

[Anonymous]

You’re husband is an immature d-bag.

[Anonymous]

Anytime a child of any age saves up their money to buy something for someone just tugs at my heart. The intent is so strong in order for children to give up their hard-earned money for someone else.

[Anonymous]

Asperger's?

I mean, even my socially clueless husband with ADHD and Asperger's knows how to say thank you first, in a half-decent sincere manner.

You really need to have a serious discussion with him about manners.

[Anonymous]

I’m so sorry. Your kids will remember what he did. My husband still remembers a time he was really excited to show his dad something and ran around the corner, catching his dad off-guard. His dad yelled at him, “Why are you being so loud!! Leave me alone!!”

[Anonymous]

I'm a bit skeptical about this story considering DCUM'ers complain about leaf blowers disrupting their peace and quiet.

[Anonymous]

My dad acted like that a lot. He also screamed and had tantrums like a baby. He has since passed away and I don't miss him at all.

OP, straight up tell your son that his father was rude, and that he (your son) is a thoughtful person who will have lots of success in life and relationships.

Also, can you think of anything to use the leaf blower for? Clear off your stoop? Try to use it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are you still married to this guy?

This is not something to divorce over. You women are over the top

[Anonymous]

Am wondering if he has always been like this or if this is something new? Or has he always been an asshole to you but now it's spilling over onto the kids and that is the line in the sane for you?