Kid got in off WL to an elite school but won’t go
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| I went to one of the schools you mention as best. It definitely helped launch my career and had provided me with constant connections, but I hated the majority of my time there. It wasn’t the right fit for me. I often wonder if I would have had the same career without the school, but regardless, don’t force it on him. 4 years is a long time. |
Anonymous
| Just make sure his school choice has an adequate endowment to cover the coronavirus costs and create opportunities at this crazy time. My kid is a junior at one of those schools you mentioned and is still getting paid by the school to do summer research at home. And he's been put in touch with alumni who are helping him get a summer internship after his original one was canceled. The extra resources those schools have are going to make a difference in a bad economy. |
Anonymous
| Or Kenyon? |
Anonymous
Seriously, mom!!! |
Anonymous
| Maybe he knows later on you will throw up the money to him or another reason. If he's happy at the one he choose, why not support him. Save the extra money for graduate school. |
Anonymous
| This is his first big decision of his adult life. He needs to own it. If he owns it, he'll work hard to prove his decision was a good one. He will work hard to prove it to you. That is what you want. That is what you want above all else. |
Anonymous
| He is probably resentful towards the more prestigious school for waitlisting hiim. Some kids really don't want to be someone's second choice. Plus, he's had at least a month to envision himself at the top 15 school, which wanted him enough to give him merit. He will be fine at the top 15 school. I understand, OP. I mourned my DS giving up prestigious schools more than he did. Just let him make the decision. |
Anonymous
Agree. Plus he may have started making friends at the top 15 school (my senior dd has met a ton of future classmates and she is not very social - I think it has to do with the pandemic). Also, many of the schools have been rolling out the red carpet with webinars etc and he may really just want to go to the top 15 now that he has learned more about it. You need to relax. |
Anonymous
|
Top 15 with merit? So I'm impressed. Just say congratulations and let it go.
Truly. Let it go. |
Anonymous
| Years ago, we had a wonderful private college counselor. My son was considering Boston College (a good school) and several other more prestigious schools. I asked her if he would be making a mistake if he went to Boston College instead of one of the even higher ranked schools. Her answer: not at all; let him go to college where he wants so long as it's a good one. What is most important is that he enjoy himself there and do well and then, if so inclined, have the grades that will get him into a good graduate program - the latter being more important than the college choice. I thought and still think that it was a thoughtful and very good answer. |
Anonymous
| Ugh. The OP is the worst of DCUM - only worried about rankings and prestige, not about actual fit and preference. Poor kid. |
Anonymous
|
This is an utterly idiotic thread. This is why suburban moms need to get more friends and get in touch with their own parents.
Unless your son is under the wrong impression that you can't pay for the more 'prestigious' because of no merit aid, in which case you should correct that wrong impression, you should let your son do what he wants. Complaining about a 'top 15' LAC vs. a 'top 3' one is idiotic. |
Anonymous
| Humble brag.. or more likely a lie. Kid's going to NoVA. |
Anonymous
|
Obviously this is the Davidson vs. Pomona poster.
Davidson is a very fine LAC. It's been T-10 for most years. The academics are elite and getting merit aid on top of that would make it a great choice. The alumni network is strong and its outcomes and reputation is stellar. Pomona may be slightly higher ranked on paper, but it's not leagues above Davidson IMO. I'm guessing there is no merit aid since they don't offer any. Above all, the schools are extremely different from one another and I think a student would clearly know what they'd prefer. Be proud of your son for making not only a financially wise choice, but one that probably demonstrates picking on fit over just simple prestige. |
Anonymous
| He has to do the work, so it is HIS choice. Don't look back. I have been in your shoes. |