Kindergarten: my son comes back full of religion stories from a classmate. How to handle it?

[Anonymous]

Good grief OP. I'd welcome my kid getting a class in religion from a classmate.
Wait until your kid learns about sex or porn or worse from kids on the elementary school playground. That is coming soon.

[Anonymous]

Here's how I'd react:

Oh, Sarah told you the story of Esther? And Jane told you the story about David and Goliath? Cool, those are neat stories from different traditions! Those are not our tradition, though. What stories do we have that you can share? (Or if your family is not religious, you might suggest a myth or legend.)

[Anonymous]

OP you’ve gotten great advice so far. There is nothing to handle. Your kid will be fine. He will be exposed to lots more. Wait until his classmate tells him there is no tooth fairy, or what sex is, or what marijuana is. You raise the kid how you want but then know he will be in a big world out there.

[Anonymous]

As long as the friend isn't telling your son he's "bad" or that he's "going to hell" or that he's going to be deported--I think it's fine.

In fact, this is a good time for you to talk with your DS about your family's views and that everyone has different views. As long as we're respectful and kind, that is fine.

Like a few of the pps mentioned, my DS is in MS. There are far worse things to hear at school than religion. The other day, my DS12 told a girl in his class that she couldn't monopolize the class charger for her personal phone (which she's not supposed to have in the classroom)- she said something to him so beyond the pale that my own DS (not a shrinking violet himself) was in a state of shock the entire evening. I couldn't pry it out of him- and not for lack of trying.

Buckle up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is there to handle? Your kid will hear lots of things from classmates in school that you may not have chosen to discuss with him. If you want to keep him in a bubble, homeschool.

This

[Anonymous]

I am Christian and my husband is atheist so we have this challenge too. I don't think religion is private, I think it's an important part of community life, so i don't mind my preschooler hearing stuff from his friends but I do try to stress that adults think different things and he has his entire life to learn these stories and decide what he believes.

I also don't give an easy answer when he says "is this true?" because i don't think it's an easy answer even when I do believe it. Like when we were talking about Easter and he came out with "but that didn't happen! That's just a story!" I agreed with him that it is very hard to believe because it's impossible given what we know about the world, that's what we call a miracle, and some grown ups (like me) believe God can make something impossible happen but some do not. I want to create the space for him to know this is something to ask questions about and explore for himself, not just believe on authority.

[Anonymous]

What exactly would you handle? Kids talk to each other at school. You might not always agree with the topic. Your choices are to get over it or homeschool. Simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As long as the friend isn't telling your son he's "bad" or that he's "going to hell" or that he's going to be deported--I think it's fine.

In fact, this is a good time for you to talk with your DS about your family's views and that everyone has different views. As long as we're respectful and kind, that is fine.

Like a few of the pps mentioned, my DS is in MS. There are far worse things to hear at school than religion. The other day, my DS12 told a girl in his class that she couldn't monopolize the class charger for her personal phone (which she's not supposed to have in the classroom)- she said something to him so beyond the pale that my own DS (not a shrinking violet himself) was in a state of shock the entire evening. I couldn't pry it out of him- and not for lack of trying.

Buckle up.

This is what happened in our situation - also in K.

I think what alot of PPs are overlooking is that kids at this age are very black/white in their thinking - there is not much nuance. Generally speaking, you try to just give basic answers to questions and take it as far as the kid wants to take it. It's hard (even for adults) to deal with someone that is very dogmatic and continuing to insist that you're bad and going to hell - even when your kid is telling them that's not true and that people believe different things and trying to play with somebody else. I ended up running into the mom and took the opportunity to say essentially, that we all have different religious beliefs but that telling another person that they're bad/going to hell really hurt my child's feelings; she seemed to understand and seemed to be glad to learn that this is where her kid was taking the conversation.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to treat this as cross-cultural learning. Just as your child may come home asking why Abel eats injera bread with his lunch, your child may come home asking why Adam thinks the Rapture is coming next year.

Look at it as a chance to talk about different cultures and belief systems.

[Anonymous]

Oh young grasshopper! Just wait till your kids come home with classmate-sourced facts on sex, puberty, Santa, politics, how terrible the teacher is, why the Redskins have been unjustly treated, etc.

It's just the beginning.

[Anonymous]

Are you never going to take your child to the art museum, so they won’t have to see religious art pieces? Are you not going to go to the symphony if the piece was based on something religious?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is there to handle? Your kid will hear lots of things from classmates in school that you may not have chosen to discuss with him. If you want to keep him in a bubble, homeschool.

+1

+2

How would you feel if my child told your child that there is no God? It’s the exact same principle. I’m sure you’d be complaining bitterly.

Oh, come on. It's DCUM. Nobody cares about that.

But when a kid says that Santa is pretend, look out!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you never going to take your child to the art museum, so they won’t have to see religious art pieces? Are you not going to go to the symphony if the piece was based on something religious?

This is a dumb argument. Are you never going to look at statues of Ancient Greece or Aztec art because it conflicts with your religion?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is there to handle? Your kid will hear lots of things from classmates in school that you may not have chosen to discuss with him. If you want to keep him in a bubble, homeschool.

+1

+2

How would you feel if my child told your child that there is no God? It’s the exact same principle. I’m sure you’d be complaining bitterly.

I’m Christian, but I also do what OP claims to do (although seemingly does not do) and my Kindergartener already knows about atheism, Judaism, Islam, Jehovah’s Witnesses... so no she would not come home alarmed if someone told her there is no God.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is there to handle? Your kid will hear lots of things from classmates in school that you may not have chosen to discuss with him. If you want to keep him in a bubble, homeschool.

+1

+2

How would you feel if my child told your child that there is no God? It’s the exact same principle. I’m sure you’d be complaining bitterly.

This.

What do you mean? It would be fine. Lots of people are atheist. I would also be fine if a Hindu person told my kids their religious stories and if a Muslim told theirs. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs. It is your job to raise your child. No one else’s. You cannot control what the kids say on the playground. If you want that controlled of an environment, you need to homeschool. If you beliefs (or non beliefs) are so shaky that one child discussing them is upsetting (or makes you bitter?), you need stronger beliefs.

there is a difference between telling some nonsense Jesus story versus saying gays will burn in hell because the Old Testament says so. Or my dc being told they are “saved” yet. I mean if you want to fill up your kids with bible stories, I don’t care. But if you spread your intolerant beliefs on my kid or uSe them to shame kids who are transgender, for example, i would Make a massive fuss at the school. Most religiOus types think it’s okay to force their beliefs on people because you “can’t control kids”. Untrue.