Is anyone’s DH proud and happy as provider with medium salary?

[Anonymous]

Can I just say the word "provider" gives me the heebie jeebies. It's infantilizing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH makes about half what he could be making because he wants to be home for dinner and to spend weekends with his kids. (Same for me, actually.) So yes, we are all happy and proud about that choice.

+1 My DH is a Fed and prioritizes a work-life balance over a high income; I’m not materialistic and we’re on the same page.

[Anonymous]

Wait, $150k is a great salary! DCUM is so skewed!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait, $150k is a great salary! DCUM is so skewed!

That's what I make, and I don't feel poor. I have a nice house in a good school district, have nice vacations, and don't pine for anything I can't afford.

[Anonymous]

My husband has several terminal degrees and works as a senior research scientist in cancer, among other diseases.

He is paid about 100K annually, sometimes a little more.

There is no higher calling than working to cure human ills, or teaching the next generation, or serving one's fellow human in such a direct way.

So yes, pretty happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can I just say the word "provider" gives me the heebie jeebies. It's infantilizing.

I totally agree.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I appreciate it very much and appreciate all he does for us.

[Anonymous]

DH makes 109k in IT. He is great at his job and appreciated so he is happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH makes about half what he could be making because he wants to be home for dinner and to spend weekends with his kids. (Same for me, actually.) So yes, we are all happy and proud about that choice.

Same here. (In house vs law firm.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am sorry I was not clear. I meant as a single earner. That is what I meant by provider. Apologies for brevity, I am typing on my phone.

$150k is an awesome salary, OP. My DH makes that, and I am proud of him -- I hope he is, too. I make about 100k and am very proud of that, too.

If you your DH doesn't make enough money for your standards, why aren't you working?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH was a slow starter. He spent a lot of time and money in school and emerged with a lot of debt but no clear career path. When he finally did get into a career he was well into his 30s. He compares himself to his family a lot, and is making more than his brothers and dad, so there’s definitely a feeling that he’s been more successful, if success is measured in salary.

We both know he got a late start and could have made better choices that would have led to a better salary sooner, but we’re both grateful that his work allows us to live comfortably day to day, although our trajectory in terms of savings and retirement is bleak. Hoping to help that when our kids are older and I can return to work full time.

What is your career?

Federal employee, DoD.

[Anonymous]

DH makes about 200k before bonuses and I make about 90k.
I'd say we are both happy. I wish he worked a little less, but we have a good life. We have 1 and are ttc so ask me in a year.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Dh makes about $120k and is home at 4:30 to get dd from preschool. He's happy in his work most of the time and happy he can spend time with us. I make a little more but also with a decent schedule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH makes about 200k before bonuses and I make about 90k.
I'd say we are both happy. I wish he worked a little less, but we have a good life. We have 1 and are ttc so ask me in a year.

a $300k HHi is a very different thing, even the $200k is quite a jump from OPs criteria...

[Anonymous]

Jesus is this the same OP who posts repeatedly because her fiancé only makes 90k?