As educators, what do you really think of...

[Anonymous]

I posted above. We have to include all of our students on our annual SLO and we cannot exempt students who have poor attendance. I guess think we should be doing more about their attendance. I have 3 students who were retained in first grade last year. Each one of them has missed more than 180 days of school from pre-k until last year. In 3 years, they’ve racked up more than 180 of school absences. They won’t meet the target in my SLO and that could cause me not to get a raise. There is nothing I can do about it. We have a FT person to deal with students like this since we have so many of them. It used to annoy me but the longer I work there, the more I realize that the kids have no control over their lives. When they do show up, we pay a lot of attention to them since they are starving for it. I cannot imagine what it is like for them. Academically, they are far behind. It would be like us going to a movie and then leafing after 10 minutes and then returning for 10 minutes and then leaving for 15 minutes for the entire movie. At the end, we would have no idea what the movie was about. Neither do these kids. They are very appreciative of everything though. The little things in my treasure box make their day as do any holiday candies, etc. They are sweet kids stuck with parents who don’t deserve them. I wish I could bring them home with me even just sometimes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame kids for attendance or tardies. Ever. I don't blame kids for low academic achievement. I even can understand and empathize with some families for not being able to do the homework (lack of language, domestic issues, etc) or supplement at home. For me, the hard thing to deal with are behaviors. I have a very difficult child in my room this year, likely on the spectrum (undiagnosed). VERY difficult. Parents aren't any help and in fact are contributing to the behaviors being worse than they need to be. I don't want to get too detailed but I resent the heck out of the parents and I have to force myself to "act" like I love and care for this student. I actually dislike him very much. However, I try very hard to be kind, firm, supportive even though I don't feel any of those things. For me this is being professional. I do feel a lot of guilt over how much I dislike him and how much I pray he doesn't show up at school each day.

Sounds like both the school and parents are failing the child. You talk about what the parents are not doing but what are you doing? You should initiate an IEP and get him more supports.

Why am I not initiating an IEP? Hmm. Because the parents insist there is nothing wrong with their child at all. They have openly told us they will not allow any sped services.
What am I doing? I have sent weekly emails to the mother to update her on progress, I have instituted a check in check out system. I have compiled social stories for him. I have given him proximity seating. I have prepped a shit ton of visual signals. I have taught the other children that it is not acceptable to call him a "bad boy" (which they started to do, because he behaves poorly) I've set up his own personal system where he earns points towards something he wants for appropriate behavior. I have him in his own personal reading group to help him. I preteach behaviors repetitively one on one (which takes time away from everyone else). I've taken a course, semester long, on my own time and dime, to learn how to assist autistic children. Even though the parents insist nothing is wrong with him, he displays all the signs and many behaviors. So while we cannot diagnose, he is responding somewhat to autism type behavior mod. I have taken pictures of him doing the right thing as a positive reinforcement and to help visually. I call on him every 3rd or 4th time I call on someone in order to reduce the number of times he loudly and in a whiny voice demands "but I WANNNNNNNT a turn" over and over again. I put his cubby towards the front of the cubbies so he doesn't knock over every single other kid while getting his coat on. I stand between him and the other kids to prevent this, which he loves to do because he thinks it is hilarious. And, I have renewed my tetanus shot because he bit me once.

This child runs into other kids on purpose, throws things, has hit a staff member, screams, shouts out and disrupts instruction at least once per minute (as proven by data taken by the social worker) when he's having a bad day, once every 2-3 minutes on a good day and has bitten me.

And here's the other thing, if you think it is so easy to get an IEP for a kid with a parent who refuses to even look at that option, you have no idea how much schools do NOT want to have to pay for the extra $$ it costs to have a child with an IEP on its roster. We have outright been told that our numbers are too high and they aren't accepting any more evals. Totally illegal, but that's how it goes. Now, if enough other parents in the class complain, which they don't cause they are poor immigrants, the school might do something. But since they don't, the school isn't going to do anything.

[Anonymous]

I have a student similar to the PP and I tell parents of my other students that they need to talk to the principal about the behaviors of this student. We have referred him to SST multiple times but when parents aren't onboard and they don't respond to any means of communication (even home visits), it makes the situation much more difficult. Teachers want their students to succeed and many bend over backward to make it happen but teachers are one part of a a 3 legged stool. Students and parents are the other legs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame kids for attendance or tardies. Ever. I don't blame kids for low academic achievement. I even can understand and empathize with some families for not being able to do the homework (lack of language, domestic issues, etc) or supplement at home. For me, the hard thing to deal with are behaviors. I have a very difficult child in my room this year, likely on the spectrum (undiagnosed). VERY difficult. Parents aren't any help and in fact are contributing to the behaviors being worse than they need to be. I don't want to get too detailed but I resent the heck out of the parents and I have to force myself to "act" like I love and care for this student. I actually dislike him very much. However, I try very hard to be kind, firm, supportive even though I don't feel any of those things. For me this is being professional. I do feel a lot of guilt over how much I dislike him and how much I pray he doesn't show up at school each day.

Sounds like both the school and parents are failing the child. You talk about what the parents are not doing but what are you doing? You should initiate an IEP and get him more supports.

Spoken like someone who has never worked in a school, knows nothing about IEPs, lives in a bubble, and probably thinks teachers should give every student an A just for showing up. No, the parents are 100% failing the child the chose to have and take care of. The school should not be responsible for raising your children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a witch. You should find another job. If you have those kinds of feelings towards a child you are supposed to be leading and teaching you need to take a deep look at yourself and the type of person you are.

I know a teacher like this who hated a child in her class and the child knew it and everyone else knew it. She was deluding herself thinking she was bring "professional" and telling everyone how supportive and kind she was being whereas she was really causing a lot of harm to the child.

Don't think the child doesn't feel your dislike.

NP...you are a witch and an idiot. Get out of your fantasy world and start living in the real world. Then learn how to read and comprehend. The teacher you are replying to is still a human. It sounds as though they are doing everything they are capable of to help that child despite the child and family. If you want to blame someone blame where it begins, in the home with families who have children and don’t take responsibility for the child they are suppose to be raising. Your precious snowflake will only be precious and perfect to you. In the real world your child doesn’t get a pass Bc you couldn’t take the time to address behavior and provide a stable, nurturing environment. Your example is exclusive to you.

[Anonymous]

Forgive my ignorance, but I’m genuinely curious as to what an IEP does for a teacher. I thought it provided a set of requirements that the teacher needs to follow to give extra help to a student with a diagnosis, in order to ensure the child is not left unsupported. If a teacher is already giving that support, why the desire on the teacher’s part for an IEP? And what can the parents do for the teacher given that they are not the ones in the classroom during school hours?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I teach 8th grade at a low income school. I have lots of students who fit the description.

Staff across the board goes out of their way to try to even the playing field for these kids. We all stay after multiple days a week for free tutoring, bring them food and send passes to remind them, etc. More than anything though, we try to teach them skills to overcome the deficits they have at home. I've purchased an alarm clock for a kid who had no way of waking up on time for the bus. I've helped them apply for high school scholarships when they didn't have a present parent to navigate the forms for them.

We love these kids and while there is definitely pity and sadness for the cards they were dealt, the fact of the matter is that in a few short years no one is going to care that they have it rough, so we have to help them become self sufficient and independent in the mean time.

The only way to help those kids would have been for the parents to lose custody at birth.

But no one wants to say the obvious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Forgive my ignorance, but I’m genuinely curious as to what an IEP does for a teacher. I thought it provided a set of requirements that the teacher needs to follow to give extra help to a student with a diagnosis, in order to ensure the child is not left unsupported. If a teacher is already giving that support, why the desire on the teacher’s part for an IEP? And what can the parents do for the teacher given that they are not the ones in the classroom during school hours?

Without an IEP, students cannot get extra support from a special educator. They cannot get testing or classroom accommodations such as extended time, repeated directions, small testing group away from distractions, a scribe, etc. Many teachers give some of these anyway but I have students who are so far behind that they really need individual goals and the aid of a special educator. You can’t get that kind of help without an IEP. You can only differentiate in class so much and the only they get, the more self conscious kids get. If you can read on a kindergarten level in 3rd grade, many students are embarrassed and will shut down or act up in class to deflect attention from the fact that they are so far behind.

[Anonymous]

The one thing that teachers could do and don't, and that I blame them for, is to not use parent volunteers. How many kids who are in 3rd grade, but reading at a K level, could be helped by one-on-one attention from volunteers (and could have benefitted along the way)? We expect one person to manage a huge classroom with multiple learning levels and many types of disabilities and it isn't humanly possible. So admit that and use parents and other volunteers whenever possible to fill in the gaps. But most won't. At all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The one thing that teachers could do and don't, and that I blame them for, is to not use parent volunteers. How many kids who are in 3rd grade, but reading at a K level, could be helped by one-on-one attention from volunteers (and could have benefitted along the way)? We expect one person to manage a huge classroom with multiple learning levels and many types of disabilities and it isn't humanly possible. So admit that and use parents and other volunteers whenever possible to fill in the gaps. But most won't. At all.

We aren't allowed to use parent volunteers in the classroom. They can make copies, cut out laminating, work at a desk outside the classroom but that's it aside from volunteer on field trips. Once we make this clear to parents, most of them don't want to come in to help. I think many of the parent volunteers just wanted to 1) spy on the teacher and/or other students or 2) only work with their child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The one thing that teachers could do and don't, and that I blame them for, is to not use parent volunteers. How many kids who are in 3rd grade, but reading at a K level, could be helped by one-on-one attention from volunteers (and could have benefitted along the way)? We expect one person to manage a huge classroom with multiple learning levels and many types of disabilities and it isn't humanly possible. So admit that and use parents and other volunteers whenever possible to fill in the gaps. But most won't. At all.

Where do you live? It cannot be MoCo bc if you were then you wouldn’t write something so ignorant. Parent volunteers cannot provide anything you mention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Forgive my ignorance, but I’m genuinely curious as to what an IEP does for a teacher. I thought it provided a set of requirements that the teacher needs to follow to give extra help to a student with a diagnosis, in order to ensure the child is not left unsupported. If a teacher is already giving that support, why the desire on the teacher’s part for an IEP? And what can the parents do for the teacher given that they are not the ones in the classroom during school hours?

+1.

It resolved them of some responsibility and accountability. If the child doesnt meet grade level expectations or misbehaves when a visitor or admin is watching, they can blame it on a documented disability rather than their lack of teaching and classroom management skills. Another thing it does is open up the possibility of having the child removed from the classroom for all or part of the day into a self contained classroom so the teacher doesnt have to deal with it. None of this would benefit the misbehaving child much whichbis probably why the parents refused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgive my ignorance, but I’m genuinely curious as to what an IEP does for a teacher. I thought it provided a set of requirements that the teacher needs to follow to give extra help to a student with a diagnosis, in order to ensure the child is not left unsupported. If a teacher is already giving that support, why the desire on the teacher’s part for an IEP? And what can the parents do for the teacher given that they are not the ones in the classroom during school hours?

+1.

It resolved them of some responsibility and accountability. If the child doesnt meet grade level expectations or misbehaves when a visitor or admin is watching, they can blame it on a documented disability rather than their lack of teaching and classroom management skills. Another thing it does is open up the possibility of having the child removed from the classroom for all or part of the day into a self contained classroom so the teacher doesnt have to deal with it. None of this would benefit the misbehaving child much whichbis probably why the parents refused.

*absolves*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgive my ignorance, but I’m genuinely curious as to what an IEP does for a teacher. I thought it provided a set of requirements that the teacher needs to follow to give extra help to a student with a diagnosis, in order to ensure the child is not left unsupported. If a teacher is already giving that support, why the desire on the teacher’s part for an IEP? And what can the parents do for the teacher given that they are not the ones in the classroom during school hours?

+1.

It resolved them of some responsibility and accountability. If the child doesnt meet grade level expectations or misbehaves when a visitor or admin is watching, they can blame it on a documented disability rather than their lack of teaching and classroom management skills. Another thing it does is open up the possibility of having the child removed from the classroom for all or part of the day into a self contained classroom so the teacher doesnt have to deal with it. None of this would benefit the misbehaving child much whichbis probably why the parents refused.

So the child should just be able to disrupt class, disrespect fellow students and teachers. All the while the parents, similar to you, take no responsibility and instead blame the teacher. Nevermind the parents fail to acknowledge the reality of their child or actually help them. Easier to blame everyone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgive my ignorance, but I’m genuinely curious as to what an IEP does for a teacher. I thought it provided a set of requirements that the teacher needs to follow to give extra help to a student with a diagnosis, in order to ensure the child is not left unsupported. If a teacher is already giving that support, why the desire on the teacher’s part for an IEP? And what can the parents do for the teacher given that they are not the ones in the classroom during school hours?

+1.

It resolved them of some responsibility and accountability. If the child doesnt meet grade level expectations or misbehaves when a visitor or admin is watching, they can blame it on a documented disability rather than their lack of teaching and classroom management skills. Another thing it does is open up the possibility of having the child removed from the classroom for all or part of the day into a self contained classroom so the teacher doesnt have to deal with it. None of this would benefit the misbehaving child much whichbis probably why the parents refused.

So the child should just be able to disrupt class, disrespect fellow students and teachers. All the while the parents, similar to you, take no responsibility and instead blame the teacher. Nevermind the parents fail to acknowledge the reality of their child or actually help them. Easier to blame everyone else.

What a timely discussion! https://www.wbaltv.com/article/state-lawmakers-considering-bill-that-would-fine-parents-1000-for-misbehaving-child/26256209?fbclid=IwAR3Y8VFt3yslc0aszracs8vpMP7-EgdijgdUnqJWJopv8i7C1cwmWKvsxK8