Do married people really get hit on as much as it appears on this board?

[Anonymous]

When I was single 20's men hit on me all the time so I wore a ring on my ring finger to avoid the advances.

An older male coworker told me this and it panned out to be true for me... anecdotally.

"You know once you turn 30 the ring will just attract attention"... "looking for an uncommitted hookup, girls with no rings in the 30s are looking for marriage, married women in their 30's are just looking for a hookup"

Okay, whatever.... then I turned 30 and was married with a wedding ring and it was true. Men hit on me all the time.

I took off my ring at work and people stopped hitting on me. Also men hit on me more when I had long hair vs short hair.

I'm 48 now and I get hit on once or twice a year, but the men are either early 30's or late 60's.

[Anonymous]

I think it all depends on the vibe you give. If I am out dancing with girlfriends and decide to be a little More flirtatious, then there is a new guy trying to talk to me every 5 min. None had EVER hit on me at work or professional environment ever. I just purposefully don’t want to give that vibe. I dress very conservatively, only speak about work, never look at men in the eyes unless we are having a conversation, etc. I also don’t fraternize at work much in general (men and women). It has all to do with how you portray yourself. Are you giving the “I am available... to date... flirt... whatever” or “I am super professional don’t come close to me” vibe?
I don’t think being married or not makes a big difference.

[Anonymous]

I have a lot of guys in my workplace flirt with me but not hit on

I am an attractive, young female and have never been hit on when I'm at girls night or something like that

its mostly casual flirting between other married people

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 37 and a happily married woman. I get hit on usually at least once a month when I'm out and about, for ladies night at the bar etc. I'm attractive but nothing amazing to look at either. I thought this would have stopped by my early 30s, but nope. I'll enjoy it while it lasts

Can you give examples of what you mean when you say “hit on?” Like flirting or directly propositioning etc?

Many women think a simple nice conversation means being hit on. It's all in the eye of the beholder and what they want to think it is. My guess is that she isn't really being hit on but it makes a good story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get hit on and I am old, married, wear a ring. Usually by men young enough to be my kid, 30ish. It is weird. At gas stations while pumping gas, waiting rooms, supermarket, etc.

Do you mean that friendly people say "hi" to you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get hit on and I am old, married, wear a ring. Usually by men young enough to be my kid, 30ish. It is weird. At gas stations while pumping gas, waiting rooms, supermarket, etc.

They ask for my number! And no, I don’t give it. Not just a nice conversation...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get hit on and I am old, married, wear a ring. Usually by men young enough to be my kid, 30ish. It is weird. At gas stations while pumping gas, waiting rooms, supermarket, etc.

Do you mean that friendly people say "hi" to you?

The guy at the supermarket offered to pay for my groceries first before asking. lol! I refused both.

[Anonymous]

I have had men clearly hit on me, to which I show my ring and say "Sorry, I'm married." The next response on too many occasions has been "Are you happy?" Unreal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have had men clearly hit on me, to which I show my ring and say "Sorry, I'm married." The next response on too many occasions has been "Are you happy?" Unreal.

The facts matter. It's a good follow-up question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had men clearly hit on me, to which I show my ring and say "Sorry, I'm married." The next response on too many occasions has been "Are you happy?" Unreal.

The facts matter. It's a good follow-up question.

PP here - whether I'm happy or not is irrelevant in this situation. I'm not interested in men outside of my husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have had men clearly hit on me, to which I show my ring and say "Sorry, I'm married." The next response on too many occasions has been "Are you happy?" Unreal.

If you read DCUM enough, this should not strike you as unreal at all. There are plenty of unsatisfied married women out there - in sexless marriages, with fat, lazy, and boring husbands who don't pay attention to them. A bored married woman is like a dying plant that just needs a little water.

If a guy hits on a single woman, then he is competing with all the other men in the world. If a guy hits on a married woman, he is competing with ONE other guy - and the chances are excellent that the guy is, as I said, fat lazy and boring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm married and relatively young. No one has expressed an interest in me for at least a few years,since I began dating and married my DH.

I can't imagine a normal guy propositioning a clearly married woman.

Then you need to find out why nobody else is interested in you before your DH does.

you are a mean person

+1

As a 50 year-old man, I have never in my life hit on a married woman, nor has one ever hit on me (plenty of single women have, thank you). It's not normal behavior and honestly this board sometimes has more in common with "Dear Penthouse" than it does with real life.

[Anonymous]

Guy here. Been married for almost 15 years. Am fit, good looking, good job, etc. and I don't recall ever being hit on (I'm 42). Maybe some flirting but that's about it.

[Anonymous]

Flirted with/stared at? Absolutely. Directly hit on/asked out? No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm married and relatively young. No one has expressed an interest in me for at least a few years,since I began dating and married my DH.

I can't imagine a normal guy propositioning a clearly married woman.

I get hit on pretty regularly, but noticed an uptick when I remarried and put on a ring. I guess some guys prefer married women.