expulsion from school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also hesitate to hire a lawyer to get him off. I have seen so many kids whose parents do this and the kid realizes his parents will just bail him out. I do have the means to hire a good lawyer. I will not get him off on the marijuana charges. That is on him. The knife and expulsion from school is what I struggle with. I am 100% certain he had no idea it was in his car.

OMG GET HIM A LAWYER. You are not understanding the long term consequences that this can carry. The punishment for this kind of stuff so often is disproportionate to the crime. Get him a lawyer!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also hesitate to hire a lawyer to get him off. I have seen so many kids whose parents do this and the kid realizes his parents will just bail him out. I do have the means to hire a good lawyer. I will not get him off on the marijuana charges. That is on him. The knife and expulsion from school is what I struggle with. I am 100% certain he had no idea it was in his car.

Why would you hesitate to hire a lawyer? The knife change is the bigger issue here that may lead to expulsion. That's a big deal. Also, I've never done any drugs, and would be really upset with my kids if they vaped pot, but it's pot. That's not something I would let my kid fall on a sword legally for either if I could intervene. Especially a 12th grader. Get a lawyer and kid your kid off of whatever you can. Then you impose whatever severe punishment you want to at home.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like he's guilty on all charges. Burner going to learn his lesson the hard way. Society cannot function if some people don't drop out of school and do the menial tasks. From the rest of us, thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a good attorney and make it clear that the knife was yours/Dad's and it is a family truck, not his. He screwed up big time. Clearly you were ignoring the drug issues.

DO NOT SHAME OP for this. It does not sound like she ignores her kid. DO NOT JUDGE - it could be your kid making bad choices next, and we'll be accusing you of ignoring. The kid is a senior and OP can't monitor his every move.
OP, I agree with other PPs to get an attorney. FWIW, a friend of mine went through this very similar situation with her son. It was messy but the kid's life is not ruined (he is now early 20s). He went to community college and then transferred and graduated. He is working now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like he's guilty on all charges. Burner going to learn his lesson the hard way. Society cannot function if some people don't drop out of school and do the menial tasks. From the rest of us, thank you!

BAHAHAHA! What an asshole you are.

[Anonymous]

OP, there is no shame in getting a lawyer. Your child is being charged with a crime, therefore your child needs a lawyer. That is the way our legal system works. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for him anyway. I'm guessing you can afford one, so get one instead of burdening the public defenders.

[Anonymous]

Again, I have a lawyer for the court charges. He will plead everything down. It will not be on his record for life. He is in more trouble than you can imagine at home. To the poster that said I can't control my kid, I am. He has never said one disrespectful thing to me in his life.

To the poster that said he shouldn't work. He has good grades and also works his ass off at his job. He is a great athlete. I want a kid who knows the value of a dollar and isn't handed money. I think that is a good life skill. This is a kid who really messed up, not a bad kid.

[Anonymous]

I am talking about a lawyer to represent him at the school hearing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with getting an attorney. Unfortunately “It wasn’t his knife, he didn’t know it was there” is unlikely to carry much weight because if it did, lots of parents would say that to get their kid out of trouble when they got caught with something they shouldn’t have.

I agree. Thanks. In my state they do consider intent. If he had an altercation with a student or a school record, it would be a done deal. He's a kid that played football all week, got his butt kicked on Friday night and then would limp into his job on Saturday and Sunday to work 16 hours. People criticized me for making him work but if he wants money, he's working for it. His work loves him. his teachers are shocked saying he is one of the politest kids they know and he has tons of friends.

Vape and marijuana is way more prevalent than parents are aware of. Not making excuses. He is guilty and will get up at his hearing and admit FULL responsibility for his actions. No excuses. The one thing the officer said is that he did not lie, deny and told them exactly where it was. He was polite and cooperative.

Kills me. I have a quote in his room that I put there a few years ago saying., "you are always free to choose but you are never free from the consequences of your actions". He'll be facing severe consequences real soon. Obviously, won't be going away to college next year will be a big one.

It's the beginning of November now, are you going to impose the not going away to college consequence or is this something you think will result from the school's punishment? If this is a consequence you're going to impose, I'd think long and hard before I do that. Spend the next 9 months dealing with this and let him go away to college. Some of the smartest kids in my law school class smoked pot on a regular basis and are now successful fully functioning adults. Another drug, yes. You are overreacting if you're the one planning to impose that punishment. Nine months of consequence and treatment should be sufficient.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am talking about a lawyer to represent him at the school hearing.

I agree with this. OP, if your kid is as good as you say, why are you going to throw him to the wolves for one mistake, albeit a big one?

[Anonymous]

You hire the best lawyer money can buy and you do what it takes to get his life back on track.

This is a kid. He has not hurt anyone, right? He deserves a second chance.

[Anonymous]

why do PPs say that the drug charges go with him forever? Is he over 18? Wouldn't it be sealed if he was under 18?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with getting an attorney. Unfortunately “It wasn’t his knife, he didn’t know it was there” is unlikely to carry much weight because if it did, lots of parents would say that to get their kid out of trouble when they got caught with something they shouldn’t have.

I agree. Thanks. In my state they do consider intent. If he had an altercation with a student or a school record, it would be a done deal. He's a kid that played football all week, got his butt kicked on Friday night and then would limp into his job on Saturday and Sunday to work 16 hours. People criticized me for making him work but if he wants money, he's working for it. His work loves him. his teachers are shocked saying he is one of the politest kids they know and he has tons of friends.

Vape and marijuana is way more prevalent than parents are aware of. Not making excuses. He is guilty and will get up at his hearing and admit FULL responsibility for his actions. No excuses. The one thing the officer said is that he did not lie, deny and told them exactly where it was. He was polite and cooperative.

Kills me. I have a quote in his room that I put there a few years ago saying., "you are always free to choose but you are never free from the consequences of your actions". He'll be facing severe consequences real soon. Obviously, won't be going away to college next year will be a big one.

It's the beginning of November now, are you going to impose the not going away to college consequence or is this something you think will result from the school's punishment? If this is a consequence you're going to impose, I'd think long and hard before I do that. Spend the next 9 months dealing with this and let him go away to college. Some of the smartest kids in my law school class smoked pot on a regular basis and are now successful fully functioning adults. Another drug, yes. You are overreacting if you're the one planning to impose that punishment. Nine months of consequence and treatment should be sufficient.

This, put him in a drug treatment program, get a great lawyer for court and school and get it wiped off his record. Let him go to college and if he screws up, stop paying and let him figure it out. Don't throw him to the wolves and give up on him. You give him consequences. You stopped parenting clearly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Again, I have a lawyer for the court charges. He will plead everything down. It will not be on his record for life. He is in more trouble than you can imagine at home. To the poster that said I can't control my kid, I am. He has never said one disrespectful thing to me in his life.

To the poster that said he shouldn't work. He has good grades and also works his ass off at his job. He is a great athlete. I want a kid who knows the value of a dollar and isn't handed money. I think that is a good life skill. This is a kid who really messed up, not a bad kid.

Isn't it disrespectful to go behind your back and do drugs. You can know the value of money without working year round and just summers. Sounds like you don't want to support him. You get child support if you are divorced. That money should be used for his basic needs, not his job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with getting an attorney. Unfortunately “It wasn’t his knife, he didn’t know it was there” is unlikely to carry much weight because if it did, lots of parents would say that to get their kid out of trouble when they got caught with something they shouldn’t have.

I think it might help. He didn’t have it on his person and he was not in the truck, right?