MIL thinks a third home is more important than DH... time to cut her off?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand, OP. Did your MIL stipulate in her will that the new house should not become part of her estate upon her death, or that she has cut DH out of her will? Otherwise, whether your MIL's $10 million is in real estate, stocks or the bank I'm not sure what difference it makes once she dies.

OP. DH is completely out of the will and everything is now going to BIL.

So then your DH has no inheritance anyway - be it in real estate or cash.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can’t have it both ways. Either you continue to accept the help they are offering ... with strings attached. Or you pay your own child’s way.

I'm so sorry that your husband is in such a horribly unfair situation, what with the inheritance and spreading evil rumors about your children - that's really sad.

In my mind, I would NOT want to accept tainted money from such a person, and would rather send my children to public school and cut off MIL. However, this is really your husband's decision, because she is his mother. What does he think?

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

What they chose to do with their money is no be of your business. Just because they are siending $ on a house doesn’t mean he’s out of the will.

If you want to cut them off because of the trash talking, fine. But they can do what they want with their money.

[Anonymous]

So, from your post you are stating that you are unable to afford your lifestyle and, therefore, you accept handouts. But you don't like when your MIL discloses to others that you accept said handouts. Plus you're upset that your inlaws are daring to spend money on themselves.

Hhhhmmmm. I wonder what to think about this ... I wonder ... I wonder ... I wonder ...

Okay, wondering over.

OP, when you can afford to pay for your own lifestyle and not accept handouts then you can afford to be upset. Until then you should concentrate on doing everything that you can to afford your lifestyle and not accept handouts. Stop being ungracious and greedy. Show some gratitude. Learn to be kind to those who are helping you when you are not helping yourself.

And if you can't do any of these, then stop accepting the handouts. It sounds like your inlaws should find more deserving recipients.

[Anonymous]

My family isn't rich...but my sibling does accept handouts from my parents. In fact 100% of their income is from my parents and they let my parents pay for activities with them. They haven't been cut out of the will but I imagine someday when they refuse to help care for them.too it will happen. Not a surprising outcome if you think about it.

Depending on the number of kids you have you've already gotten a big financial benefit. Plus I assume you live in a big house also with a nice contribution from Mom?

[Anonymous]

Gossip and rumors. No one has died yet.

Focus on gratitude. Make sure you, your husband & children are expressing appreciate for their education.

Inheritance should never be an expectation. The will may not be what you expect right now. It may change between now and a parent passing away. Why fret over a will not read yet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They're paying for your kid's school and you're still whining?

What do you think happens to the house when they die anyway?

None of this is how inheritance works so pretty confusing. Gotta be troll.

+1

[Anonymous]

There is no such thing as an inheritance, until there is a death.

[Anonymous]

Just take whatever you can from them. I wish someone paid tuition for my child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand, OP. Did your MIL stipulate in her will that the new house should not become part of her estate upon her death, or that she has cut DH out of her will? Otherwise, whether your MIL's $10 million is in real estate, stocks or the bank I'm not sure what difference it makes once she dies.

OP. DH is completely out of the will and everything is now going to BIL.

Well, that has nothing to do with the fact that she's buying a house.

[Anonymous]

Not very good attempt at trolling.

Put some more effort into your next one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can’t have it both ways. Either you continue to accept the help they are offering ... with strings attached. Or you pay your own child’s way.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not very good attempt at trolling.

Put some more effort into your next one.

Agree. People don’t buy a $10m house with their last $. And usually money isn’t accounted for by kid. If she’s spending $10m on a house that’s coming out of overall assets so BIL gets less too. And unless this house has no market value it can be sold at death.

The additional post about being cut out is lame. Not at all what the the OP said which was that the inheritance is being spent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not very good attempt at trolling.

Put some more effort into your next one.

Agree. People don’t buy a $10m house with their last $. And usually money isn’t accounted for by kid. If she’s spending $10m on a house that’s coming out of overall assets so BIL gets less too. And unless this house has no market value it can be sold at death.

The additional post about being cut out is lame. Not at all what the the OP said which was that the inheritance is being spent.

Exactly. If they're spending $10m on a third house it most likely means they have assets of at least $50 million (most likely much more). Rich people do not tie up that much of their overall wealth in real estate. Houses are fixed assets that cost money in taxes and upkeep. A $10m property is going to be generating huge tax bills and maintenance and upkeep annually while the house isn't the stock market and can be subject to depreciation and decline in value, especially at that end of the market which is highly variable (you think it's bad enough taking a $100k loss on a property when selling? Think about taking a $1.5 million loss). That's why you need to have a much larger net worth to own a $10m property (this is a big hint to anyone who wants to start a trolling post, think it through carefully and don't talk about something you clearly know nothing about).

[Anonymous]

Let them finish paying for college and then tell them to get lost. Easy peasy!