5th year biglaw associate, golden handcuffed and miserable

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you try in-house? They should pay better than the small firm you applied.

I'm a litigator so my in house options are few and far between. I have been looking there too. Unfortunately my clients that like me and might be willing to create a job for me if I really worked that angle are not places we can move.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, it's ok to feel down for a few minutes, but then you need to come up with a plan so that you can quit your current job. Sit down and figure out how much you need to live on, and how much you can start saving now. Can you extend the payment period on your loans to reduce monthly payments?* Giving up Starbucks is not real savings but are there spendy things you habitually do (therapeutic shopping, for example) that you can cut? Is some of your misery pregnancy related, and likely to pass? Be real about your situation so that you can find a solution. Having a plan will make you feel better immediately.

Everybody who has left BigLaw for lifestyle reasons has taken a pay cut. Most of us are not living in poverty: we own homes and and go on vacation and put children in daycare / private school. You have had your current salary less than 5 years, that is not handcuffs.

*Please nobody yell at me about extending the loan. Yes, it will cost more in the long run. Seeing your kids, and not being miserable, is worth it.

Honestly I only use one of my paychecks for bills and the other is for saving/paying down debt, so if I could find a half-the-salary job we'd be fine. It just seems like the classic exits are not hiring.

[Anonymous]

Small firms won't have the budget, OP. And if they do, they will expect you to work biglaw hours because it all comes down to the client.

Look in-house or Federal or state government. Are you licensed in VA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Small firms won't have the budget, OP. And if they do, they will expect you to work biglaw hours because it all comes down to the client.

Look in-house or Federal or state government. Are you licensed in VA?

No, why?

[Anonymous]

Small firms don't necessarily demand less hours
Be careful

[Anonymous]

Why are you interviewing when you’re pregnant??? You’re about to have an 18 week fully paid maternity leave if you’re in biglaw.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are you interviewing when you’re pregnant??? You’re about to have an 18 week fully paid maternity leave if you’re in biglaw.

I've been interviewing for the past year. Agree that I need to stop. Assuming they won't fire me over my hours anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you try in-house? They should pay better than the small firm you applied.

I'm a litigator so my in house options are few and far between. I have been looking there too. Unfortunately my clients that like me and might be willing to create a job for me if I really worked that angle are not places we can move.

Unfortunately, it's time for you to consider leaving DC. Litigation jobs in house are rare and are usually not in DC (they're at corporate HQ - not too many companies have their HQs in DC). If you have a white collar litigation defense background, you might be able to land an in-house compliance gig.

If you're lucky enough to land an in-house gig in the DC area, it will likely pay only 2/3 (possibly less) than your BIGLAW salary + bonus. Likely somewhere $150k-$175k plus 20% bonus - in other words, high $100s to low $200s. This is livable in DC, but you won't be able to afford private school, a new BMW/Audi/Mercedes, beautiful furniture, $5k+ worth of vacations, and pay off your student loans. More likely than not, you'll drive a Honda, take an annual vacation to Disney (or to a nearby beach)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Small firms don't necessarily demand less hours
Be careful

It's not the volume of work I hate. I just want to be doing very different work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you interviewing when you’re pregnant??? You’re about to have an 18 week fully paid maternity leave if you’re in biglaw.

I've been interviewing for the past year. Agree that I need to stop. Assuming they won't fire me over my hours anyway.

Does your firm do part-time schedules? Is it possible they’ll tell you that you’re basically working part-time hours and want to pay you less going forward? That could be good or bad from your perspective. Would it make your life easier if you didn’t have the expectation to bill 1800 hours?

[Anonymous]

I just want to note how hilariously high the views are for this thread (versus not all that many people actually responding to OP). There are obviously a lot of miserable biglaw associates lurking.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately, it's time for you to consider leaving DC.

My husband is about to make partner so that's out.

Litigation jobs in house are rare and are usually not in DC (they're at corporate HQ - not too many companies have their HQs in DC). If you have a white collar litigation defense background, you might be able to land an in-house compliance gig.

I do have a fair bit of that, so maybe that's an option.

If you're lucky enough to land an in-house gig in the DC area, it will likely pay only 2/3 (possibly less) than your BIGLAW salary + bonus. Likely somewhere $150k-$175k plus 20% bonus - in other words, high $100s to low $200s.

Exactly what I'm looking for if I could find it, damn, I didn't know that sort of thing was out there.

This is livable in DC, but you won't be able to afford private school, a new BMW/Audi/Mercedes, beautiful furniture, $5k+ worth of vacations, and pay off your student loans. More likely than not, you'll drive a Honda, take an annual vacation to Disney (or to a nearby beach)

I wonder whose life you're describing. I don't know any biglaw associate living like that and I know loads of biglaw associates. We don't have or want luxury cars, we have a beautifully furnished home already, we have never taken a $5k vacation. But paying off student loans and sticking with our private school are unfortunately less negotiable.

[Anonymous]

Don't quit before you get that biglaw maternity leave. I had two of them and they're great. They're not going to can you while you're pregnant or on leave, so don't worry about the fact that you didn't make hours.

In terms of the search, most people I know (including myself) found their next job through someone they knew. Reach out to friends or to associates at other firms that you know through your matters, or to your alumni network. If small-law doesn't pay enough, look at bigger firms with regional DC offices, or at lower regarded biglaw firms. Your practice group and the ppl you work with matter most, not all biglaw sucks all of the time.

Start applying to gov't. It takes a while and many apps to get anywhere using USA JOBS. If you know someone who works there, see if they can get your resume in front of the right person.

Do a budget and figure out the real numbers. I make about 3rd year biglaw money now, with a pretty lousy bonus. My take home is not enough to cover all of our expenses, but it's not that far off and we have a substantially larger mortgage and an expensive nanny. Assuming your spouse earns an income, you guys may have room for a paycut.

GL, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you interviewing when you’re pregnant??? You’re about to have an 18 week fully paid maternity leave if you’re in biglaw.

I've been interviewing for the past year. Agree that I need to stop. Assuming they won't fire me over my hours anyway.

Does your firm do part-time schedules? Is it possible they’ll tell you that you’re basically working part-time hours and want to pay you less going forward? That could be good or bad from your perspective. Would it make your life easier if you didn’t have the expectation to bill 1800 hours?

I've wondered a million times why they haven't suggested this themselves. Many associate moms work PT at my firm. Maybe they're afraid it will sound discriminatory since I'm already a mom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't quit before you get that biglaw maternity leave. I had two of them and they're great. They're not going to can you while you're pregnant or on leave, so don't worry about the fact that you didn't make hours.

In terms of the search, most people I know (including myself) found their next job through someone they knew. Reach out to friends or to associates at other firms that you know through your matters, or to your alumni network. If small-law doesn't pay enough, look at bigger firms with regional DC offices, or at lower regarded biglaw firms. Your practice group and the ppl you work with matter most, not all biglaw sucks all of the time.

Start applying to gov't. It takes a while and many apps to get anywhere using USA JOBS. If you know someone who works there, see if they can get your resume in front of the right person.

Do a budget and figure out the real numbers. I make about 3rd year biglaw money now, with a pretty lousy bonus. My take home is not enough to cover all of our expenses, but it's not that far off and we have a substantially larger mortgage and an expensive nanny. Assuming your spouse earns an income, you guys may have room for a paycut.

GL, OP.

Thanks for this. Are you still at a firm?