Not sure it’s all, but it’s a surprisingly high % |
|
Date ? Sure. Trust them or consider as a long term partner - no way |
|
Nope. My husband cheated, and no matter what people say, it is a huge, huge, huge character flaw. He decided to stick his dick in his secretary rather than communicate his issues to me, seek help for his depression, or engage with our children. He had many, many options but he chose to seek physical gratification rather than tackle difficult issues. Then he blamed me and the kids for his actions.
I will never date a cheater. Good for them if they do the work. Good for them if they never cheat again. But I can do better than that... one of the repercussions for their actions is that some women with high standards will NEVER consider them. |
| No. Character flaw. |
+1 older poster here. I agree, although if the person cheated multiple times, I wouldn't consider a long-term relationship or marriage. |
|
No. I understand life isn't black and white. But trust is hard enough when someone doesn't have a past history. I'd find it very difficult to trust the person.
And in order for a long-term relationship to work, you have to be able to trust your partner when you are not around. |
You know the wrong kind of women. Seriously. |
| Nope. Even if they never cheat again, the character flaws will come out in other ways. I've seen that over and over. |
Let me give you an example from a recent date which is quite typical of dating in DC: I meet a professional woman who is over 50 and who has a high income. She is separated from her high income husband. I ask what happened? Her husband has moved in with a much younger single woman. But as we talk it turns out that my date had been carrying on a five year affair with a married man, which she broke off when she found out what her husband was doing. My date's ex won the lottery--got rid of her, and got a younger woman who doesn't have baggage. And yes, there are children involved. |
| Yes, you never know what people are dealing with in their marriages. Some women feel that it is OK to be deceptive before they are married Nd then change when they get married. I had a boyfriend think that by withholding sex, that i would somehow submit to his demands. Hell, no. I realized that his libido was lower than mine, so he could do that. The same with some women in marriages. They wear themselves out with the kids, cleaning the house, and arranging the social calender, only to neglect an important part of their marriage. You don't play games with your finances, sex, and ton of other stuff that was there in the beginning. |
| I cheated on an ex-boyfriend when I was 19. Didn't get caught and never cheated again. Plenty of my close friends cheated on men when they were college-aged (and were cheated on). We're all much older now and faithful to our husbands. I don't buy "once a cheater, always a cheater". My husband knows about my past, not just cheating but all of the drama and mind games and nonsense that I've outgrown. |
I know. Bad picker. |
I'm 42, female, and have never cheated. I'm happily married. |
Guy 50: fits with my experience as well. |
|
I did, but I didn't know it at the time. That said, he hasn't (as far as I know, and I have no reason to disbelieve, even though he has had lots of opportunity) cheated on me.
I never had cheated prior to marriage, but eventually I did cheat within the marriage. So, you really just never know. I agree, I'd be a poor risk for anybody to marry. No question. |