I want a divorce, how do I get my husband to leave?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Flip the genders, and ask if it would be ok for a man to throw out his SAHM DW who doesn't financially contribute to the mortgage or bills. There is your answer.

Why do you assume he is a stay at home? He is not. He is gainfully employed and makes over $70,000 a year. He doesn't pay anything towards the mortgage or household bills because I never asked him to. We used his salary for lifestyle things - car, vacations, etc.

So why did you state it as you did? Sounds to me like you have had a financial partnership during your marriage. And you are upside down on a house you have had for how many years?

[Anonymous]

It appears that most of the "lawyers" above work at Dumb, Stupid & Ignorant, P.A.

It's very simple, either your husband agrees to move out OR you hire a lawyer to tell you your legal options. I paid for the mortgage and he paid for other stuff is an extremely ignorant comment.

In many cases, the lawyer's main job is to protect his client from their own stupidity. In your case, your attorney will need to work overtime!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also, husband has a strengthened claim because he has paid the water bill. If he can show that he also contributed time and/or money to the maintenance of the house, that also strengthens his claim.

The house became the property of both of you the day you got married. Sorry, OP. Working men with SAHW's have been dealing with this for centuries.

Centuries? It has only been recently that women have been able to afford their own homes as previously women were not allowed to work jobs that paid good money. And in some cases were not allowed to work at all if pregnant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, husband has a strengthened claim because he has paid the water bill. If he can show that he also contributed time and/or money to the maintenance of the house, that also strengthens his claim.

The house became the property of both of you the day you got married. Sorry, OP. Working men with SAHW's have been dealing with this for centuries.

Centuries? It has only been recently that women have been able to afford their own homes as previously women were not allowed to work jobs that paid good money. And in some cases were not allowed to work at all if pregnant

You know all those SAHM taking car of the chickens, cows and fields.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he is not on the title you can evict him. My friend was evicted from her home when her H filed for divorce, she was not on the title, but she was cheating so that might have played into it.

Get a lawyer, they can tell you how to do it.

That is just not true. You cannot "evict" your spouse regardless of whose name is on the title. Cheating makes no difference. I guarantee you there is a lot more to that story.

Your wish this isn't true doesn't make it not true.

In VA my friend was widowed, the house was in H name. His parents got the house not his wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he is not on the title you can evict him. My friend was evicted from her home when her H filed for divorce, she was not on the title, but she was cheating so that might have played into it.

Get a lawyer, they can tell you how to do it.

That is just not true. You cannot "evict" your spouse regardless of whose name is on the title. Cheating makes no difference. I guarantee you there is a lot more to that story.

Your wish this isn't true doesn't make it not true.

In VA my friend was widowed, the house was in H name. His parents got the house not his wife.

Why would I “wish” it wasn’t true? My name is on our title. I could not possibly care less. I am telling you that your information is incorrect. Your “friend” is being less than honest.

[Anonymous]

OP, one question is: do you have kids, and if so, what custody arrangement do you envision? Custody is a huge factor in whether or not you can get him to move. Perhaps, if he gets to take the kids with him, he'd be more willing to move out.

[Anonymous]

Everyone is responding to something I did not ask or anticipate. I have no intentions (or desire) to screw my husband out of whatever he might legally be entitled to at the conclusion of the divorce. I only said that the house is mine and I pay the mortgage, to find out if there was a way that I can get him to legally leave the house during the separation.

The posters suggestion about filing for separation and living in separate rooms is the type of advice I was looking for. Basically, how can I get the process of separation started if he won't voluntarily leave. That's all. I am more than happy to let him take whatever he wants, all I want is my freedom and piece of mind. You all are looking for some ulterior motive that does not exist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you told him that you want a divorce and would like him to leave?

I have and he becomes non-responsive. Again, he thinks all of the arguing and unhappiness is normal and a part of marriage. In his mind, we don't have a reason to divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It appears that most of the "lawyers" above work at Dumb, Stupid & Ignorant, P.A.

It's very simple, either your husband agrees to move out OR you hire a lawyer to tell you your legal options. I paid for the mortgage and he paid for other stuff is an extremely ignorant comment.

In many cases, the lawyer's main job is to protect his client from their own stupidity. In your case, your attorney will need to work overtime!

What is ignorant about the truth? The comment was not meant to disparage him. It was in response to someone assuming he did not contribute financially -- which I never said. What I said was, I pay the mortgage and all the household bills. Clearly there are a lot of other finances in a marriage - duh!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone is responding to something I did not ask or anticipate. I have no intentions (or desire) to screw my husband out of whatever he might legally be entitled to at the conclusion of the divorce. I only said that the house is mine and I pay the mortgage, to find out if there was a way that I can get him to legally leave the house during the separation.

The posters suggestion about filing for separation and living in separate rooms is the type of advice I was looking for. Basically, how can I get the process of separation started if he won't voluntarily leave. That's all. I am more than happy to let him take whatever he wants, all I want is my freedom and piece of mind. You all are looking for some ulterior motive that does not exist.

Go to a lawyer and file for divorce. Find out - from the lawyer - what needs to happen for a legal separation. Get the ball rolling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone is responding to something I did not ask or anticipate. I have no intentions (or desire) to screw my husband out of whatever he might legally be entitled to at the conclusion of the divorce. I only said that the house is mine and I pay the mortgage, to find out if there was a way that I can get him to legally leave the house during the separation.

The posters suggestion about filing for separation and living in separate rooms is the type of advice I was looking for. Basically, how can I get the process of separation started if he won't voluntarily leave. That's all. I am more than happy to let him take whatever he wants, all I want is my freedom and piece of mind. You all are looking for some ulterior motive that does not exist.

You're better off getting an apartment that you share and take turns in the house with the kids (for example, Sun-Thurs you're in the house, then Thurs-Sun you're in the apartment. DH has the opposite schedule).

If you're still living under the same roof (even if in separate bedrooms), I'm not sure that this counts as "separation" for purposes of the one-year waiting period required in MD when minor children are involved. You'll need to consult with an MD divorce lawyer to make sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It appears that most of the "lawyers" above work at Dumb, Stupid & Ignorant, P.A.

It's very simple, either your husband agrees to move out OR you hire a lawyer to tell you your legal options. I paid for the mortgage and he paid for other stuff is an extremely ignorant comment.

In many cases, the lawyer's main job is to protect his client from their own stupidity. In your case, your attorney will need to work overtime!

What is ignorant about the truth? The comment was not meant to disparage him. It was in response to someone assuming he did not contribute financially -- which I never said. What I said was, I pay the mortgage and all the household bills. Clearly there are a lot of other finances in a marriage - duh!

And all of us are telling you - very clearly - that this fact doesn't give you a legal leg to stand upon to force him out of the home.

[Anonymous]

Please stop saying you pay the mortgage. You don't. You both pay for it, just like you both pay for cars and vacations.

What is the reason you want to divorce?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, one question is: do you have kids, and if so, what custody arrangement do you envision? Custody is a huge factor in whether or not you can get him to move. Perhaps, if he gets to take the kids with him, he'd be more willing to move out.

Yes we have kids. I envision joint legal custody and 50/50 physical custody. He would not want to take them for 100% of the time. Him not wanting to move is not directly related to the kids, its because he thinks our marriage and life is normal.