SIL following me around FB

[Anonymous]

Also I would personally confront her - "SIL, I saw you joined the traumatic birth group...I didn't realize you had had a traumatic birth? What's up with that?"

[Anonymous]

Create a second Facebook account that has nothing to do with your family. No pictures, nothing to identify you. Make everything up. Use that accounts to join your support groups. This way your SIL will not be able to ID you. If at all possible post from your new account and then comment from your current account so that SIL doesn't think it is you.

I don't think you are crazy to think SIL is following you. I also am in a family that would go ape sh!t if I blocked a SIL. The second account gives you a way to continue getting the support you need while keeping the family "happy" and not making your life harder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait she's joining groups that are not where she lives and about topics not of interest just to harass you?

I would certainly block.

I would discuss with my husband why he thinks her behavior is appropriate and why he's backing up his sister over his wife.

Whenever I saw her pop up in one of these groups, I would ask the group moderators to remove her because of her history of harassing you (and lack of history with the topic of interest) And if that didn't work, I would have a pseudonym facebook account to use in these groups.

Whoa, all of this. Seriously, PM the moderator of your birth trauma group and tell her, "Larla Jones is my SIL and she has been harassing me. She has not had a birth trauma and joined this group only to spy on me."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Create a second Facebook account that has nothing to do with your family. No pictures, nothing to identify you. Make everything up. Use that accounts to join your support groups. This way your SIL will not be able to ID you. If at all possible post from your new account and then comment from your current account so that SIL doesn't think it is you.

I don't think you are crazy to think SIL is following you. I also am in a family that would go ape sh!t if I blocked a SIL. The second account gives you a way to continue getting the support you need while keeping the family "happy" and not making your life harder.

I suspect that's what I'll have to do. I'll have to tell all the admins because I'll look like a spammer, but opening up a dialogue probably isn't a bad thing.

It's just too bad new girl and me will have the same stories!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait she's joining groups that are not where she lives and about topics not of interest just to harass you?

I would certainly block.

I would discuss with my husband why he thinks her behavior is appropriate and why he's backing up his sister over his wife.

Whenever I saw her pop up in one of these groups, I would ask the group moderators to remove her because of her history of harassing you (and lack of history with the topic of interest) And if that didn't work, I would have a pseudonym facebook account to use in these groups.

Whoa, all of this. Seriously, PM the moderator of your birth trauma group and tell her, "Larla Jones is my SIL and she has been harassing me. She has not had a birth trauma and joined this group only to spy on me."

Absolutely agree with this. It's not like she joined the same extreme couponing group as you, this is a seriously screwed up an intrusive thing for her to do. I have to believe that the mods of groups like this will be sensitive to your request.

[Anonymous]

I'd block her. My account, my decision. No need to justify to DH or anyone.

[Anonymous]

Could your DH be asking her to check up on you and follow your activity? Jerk move, but his comments concerning you blocking her are absurd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Could your DH be asking her to check up on you and follow your activity? Jerk move, but his comments concerning you blocking her are absurd.

I hate defending his idiotic request, but his family is the kind of drama-llama group that would make a big deal about it.

[Anonymous]

Block her and if the family makes a big deal tell them it was that or getting her suspended from fb for stalking.

[Anonymous]

Limit what she can see.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Limit what she can see.

That only works on your own wall, not in groups. You can't limit what a friend (or anyone else) sees you post in a group unless you block them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Block her and if the family makes a big deal tell them it was that or getting her suspended from fb for stalking.

+1. If they cause drama, point out that she was joining groups she had no business being in other than stalking you and put them in the position of having to decide between defending her behavior or letting it drop. Honestly, how the hell are they going to be able to defend her joining a traumatic birth board for the sole purpose of seeing what you post? It would be worth blocking her if only for the opportunity of seeing his family make asses of themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Create a second Facebook account that has nothing to do with your family. No pictures, nothing to identify you. Make everything up. Use that accounts to join your support groups. This way your SIL will not be able to ID you. If at all possible post from your new account and then comment from your current account so that SIL doesn't think it is you.

I don't think you are crazy to think SIL is following you. I also am in a family that would go ape sh!t if I blocked a SIL. The second account gives you a way to continue getting the support you need while keeping the family "happy" and not making your life harder.

This is great advice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Create a second Facebook account that has nothing to do with your family. No pictures, nothing to identify you. Make everything up. Use that accounts to join your support groups. This way your SIL will not be able to ID you. If at all possible post from your new account and then comment from your current account so that SIL doesn't think it is you.

I don't think you are crazy to think SIL is following you. I also am in a family that would go ape sh!t if I blocked a SIL. The second account gives you a way to continue getting the support you need while keeping the family "happy" and not making your life harder.

Do this. The admins of the FB group will totally understand if you explain it to them.

[Anonymous]

I have a friend with a security clearance. He has 2 FB accounts. One with his legal name and that one is "clean". Then another with a slight variation on his name (thikn John Smith instead of Jack Smith) where he adds his friends and shares personal stuff.