I slept with him too soon

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If so.eone is willing to sleep with you on x date but then dumps you because you sleep with him on x date, that person is not worth dating.

OP , there is no future with someone who holds those views or freaked because suddenly felt too serious etc. The problem is not with you. However the one reason to hold off is that sometimes you realize in 5-6 dates there's no compatibility and it's easier to.part ways if you havent sllept together or your prefer sleeping only with people you are dating

I agree with this

[Anonymous]

I think it's just as likely that he felt the same lack of chemistry you described in your OP and decided there wasn't long-term potential. It may have nothing to do with timing and everything to do with the crappy sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry OP but you know what? He probably was not a keeper long term anyway. If there is a real connection there are no Rules. I slept with my husband the night we met.

Third date. Married at the one year mark.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, your only mistake was texting too soon after sex. You will always come across as needy and insecure. Always let the guy contact you first especially after sex. Just be patient next time with the post sex texting.

Man here. This.

Also, maybe you're bad in bed. As a man, if I sleep with a woman and it's good, I'll be contacting her again and again for more. Why would I put in all the effort to find a new woman if the one I have is good in bed?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's just as likely that he felt the same lack of chemistry you described in your OP and decided there wasn't long-term potential. It may have nothing to do with timing and everything to do with the crappy sex.

+1

I have a couple of guy friend who will not give a second chance after bad sex. Their rationale is that sex is too important to them to force something that isn't natural.

[Anonymous]

There is no difference between having sex immediately vs waiting. If there is chemistry it works.

- man

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's just as likely that he felt the same lack of chemistry you described in your OP and decided there wasn't long-term potential. It may have nothing to do with timing and everything to do with the crappy sex.

+1

I have a couple of guy friend who will not give a second chance after bad sex. Their rationale is that sex is too important to them to force something that isn't natural.

It's probably this. You two just don't click that way. You acknowledged it yourself.

[Anonymous]

I don't think it was the sex wasn't good, but it might have been it just wasn't what he was looking for. As a woman, I have cut it off with guys after sex because either their body did not turn me on that much or their sexual technique was not what I am into.

Whatever it was, OP, just be glad you didn't waste another second on it.

[Anonymous]

you texted him yesterday and you're freaking out.

You have issues and they aren't about when you chose to have sex.

Put your energy into fixing your self esteem and anxiety and less into guys right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, your only mistake was texting too soon after sex. You will always come across as needy and insecure. Always let the guy contact you first especially after sex. Just be patient next time with the post sex texting.

Man here. This.

Also, maybe you're bad in bed. As a man, if I sleep with a woman and it's good, I'll be contacting her again and again for more. Why would I put in all the effort to find a new woman if the one I have is good in bed?

I have to disagree. The best sex I ever had was with a woman who did nothing for me beyond the great sex. After a month I moved on. I've been married a long time to a woman who's good but not great in bed. But she's off the charts exceptional in so many other areas.

[Anonymous]

I think it's weird he graded you like that, I wouldn't like a man judging my technique like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's weird he graded you like that, I wouldn't like a man judging my technique like that.[/quote

Giving a comment is not grading. I don't he gave op a number rating.

[Anonymous]

You didn't like the sex and he didn't like it even more.

[Anonymous]

No, no, no. There's no "too soon", whether regarding sex or texting. As others have said, if it's right, it's right. And if it's not, then playing by certain "rules" is only going to get you so far, but not to the long term.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, no, no. There's no "too soon", whether regarding sex or texting. As others have said, if it's right, it's right. And if it's not, then playing by certain "rules" is only going to get you so far, but not to the long term.

This. You can call someone twenty minutes after drunken awkward sex, and if the chemistry is otherwise there, they'll call you back. Or you can wait 3 days to call someone with whom you have mediocre chemistry, maybe drag it out into another few dates, but it still won't work out.

- Slept with DH on the third date, and still very happily married 20 years later. Would have slept with him on the first date if not for being on my period.....