Any quality 30+ guys left?

[Anonymous]

It seems to me that all the "good catches" the OP is looking for are smarter than she gives them credit, because they are avoiding her. My word. I cannot believe that younger women actually think this way.

[Anonymous]

Join a sports league that has older people e.g. not kickball.

I know tons of quality single guys from the capital alumni softball league.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. What is your definition of a good catch?
2. Why objectify men by characterizing them as objects to be caught or acquired?

Common sense?

A good catch:

- Well rounded guy who comes from a good family
- Has a respectable career earning a decent living = 150k+
- Kind and generous
- Has interest and hobbies
- A good member of society


The 30 + single guys I know are either:

- Workaholics who have deep personality or commitment issues
- Loser underachievers who have low self esteem and will not amount to much

What do the two bold parts have anything to do with being a good catch or not unless you are looking for (you fill in the blank)

Do you think a guy who comes with an abusive or dysfunctional family and have them be your in laws is a valid arrangement? Do you want an ignorant grandmother for your kids or an alcoholic grandfather for them?

Do you really think a guy earning 50k at a think tank is a catch?

First, I guess you and I are thinking of two extremes in terms of "good family". I thought when saying good family = wealthy family based on the 150k requirement. Mea culpa. However, not being from a good family should not be a disqualifier, especially if the guy has all the other traits. This means he has the grit and discipline to be such a great guy despite having grown up in a dysfunctional family, and that only says more of his positive character more than anything else.

Second, the difference between 150k and 50k is stark. Anybody with some career ambition in the DC area will have a decent income, but that doesn't mean a 150k salary. If, for example, he is a fed employee, that'll mean he has to be near the top max payscale.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. What is your definition of a good catch?
2. Why objectify men by characterizing them as objects to be caught or acquired?

Common sense?

A good catch:

- Well rounded guy who comes from a good family
- Has a respectable career earning a decent living = 150k+
- Kind and generous
- Has interest and hobbies
- A good member of society


The 30 + single guys I know are either:

- Workaholics who have deep personality or commitment issues
- Loser underachievers who have low self esteem and will not amount to much

What do the two bold parts have anything to do with being a good catch or not unless you are looking for (you fill in the blank)

Do you think a guy who comes with an abusive or dysfunctional family and have them be your in laws is a valid arrangement? Do you want an ignorant grandmother for your kids or an alcoholic grandfather for them?

Do you really think a guy earning 50k at a think tank is a catch?

First, I guess you and I are thinking of two extremes in terms of "good family". I thought when saying good family = wealthy family based on the 150k requirement. Mea culpa. However, not being from a good family should not be a disqualifier, especially if the guy has all the other traits. This means he has the grit and discipline to be such a great guy despite having grown up in a dysfunctional family, and that only says more of his positive character more than anything else.

Second, the difference between 150k and 50k is stark. Anybody with some career ambition in the DC area will have a decent income, but that doesn't mean a 150k salary. If, for example, he is a fed employee, that'll mean he has to be near the top max payscale.

I just want to put a plug in for all of the single ladies out there to vet the family first. My DH exactly fits your bolded description and yes, we have persevered and have an awesome life, but it is no walk in the park dealing with a dysfunctional, good-for-nothing family, believe me.

[Anonymous]

Carefully look at your standards to see if you are being 1)realistic; 2)fair. Had a friend who wanted only hot, young, preppy southern boys yet was herself an average but judgmental wall flower. Average looks and intellect and watches TV as a main interest. Needless to say she was single and a virgin at 30.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Carefully look at your standards to see if you are being 1)realistic; 2)fair. Had a friend who wanted only hot, young, preppy southern boys yet was herself an average but judgmental wall flower. Average looks and intellect and watches TV as a main interest. Needless to say she was single and a virgin at 30.

Did she ever find someone?

[Anonymous]

A 30 year old guy making $150k is in the 97th percentile for his age. A 39 year old guy making $150k is in the 95th percentile.

I think I've identified your problem: your income requirements alone exclude 95% of the male population. Now take out the ones who are married or come from a bad family and it's no wonder you are struggling to find your unicorn.

Source: https://dqydj.com/income-percentile-by-age-calculator/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. What is your definition of a good catch?
2. Why objectify men by characterizing them as objects to be caught or acquired?

Common sense?

A good catch:

- Well rounded guy who comes from a good family
- Has a respectable career earning a decent living = 150k+
- Kind and generous
- Has interest and hobbies
- A good member of society


The 30 + single guys I know are either:

- Workaholics who have deep personality or commitment issues
- Loser underachievers who have low self esteem and will not amount to much

What do the two bold parts have anything to do with being a good catch or not unless you are looking for (you fill in the blank)

Do you think a guy who comes with an abusive or dysfunctional family and have them be your in laws is a valid arrangement? Do you want an ignorant grandmother for your kids or an alcoholic grandfather for them?

Do you really think a guy earning 50k at a think tank is a catch?

First, I guess you and I are thinking of two extremes in terms of "good family". I thought when saying good family = wealthy family based on the 150k requirement. Mea culpa. However, not being from a good family should not be a disqualifier, especially if the guy has all the other traits. This means he has the grit and discipline to be such a great guy despite having grown up in a dysfunctional family, and that only says more of his positive character more than anything else.

Second, the difference between 150k and 50k is stark. Anybody with some career ambition in the DC area will have a decent income, but that doesn't mean a 150k salary. If, for example, he is a fed employee, that'll mean he has to be near the top max payscale.

I just want to put a plug in for all of the single ladies out there to vet the family first. My DH exactly fits your bolded description and yes, we have persevered and have an awesome life, but it is no walk in the park dealing with a dysfunctional, good-for-nothing family, believe me.

This is OP.

The bad family is precisely why I broke up with my ex. We had issues but the crazy family bit was the nail in the coffin. The problem with this is that unless the person is extremely self aware and mature, he can be desensitized to a lot of crazy abnormal toxic behavior rampant in his family. I do not want to raise a family with someone who thinks having a smothering ignorant toxic mother is normal. Nor did I want my children to hear there grandfather get drunk and say irresponsible and mean things about minorities and the poor.

I'm sorry I just...couldn't. My number 1 requirement is that my children, if I should have some, grown up in a safe loving and enriching home with kind intelligent people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Carefully look at your standards to see if you are being 1)realistic; 2)fair. Had a friend who wanted only hot, young, preppy southern boys yet was herself an average but judgmental wall flower. Average looks and intellect and watches TV as a main interest. Needless to say she was single and a virgin at 30.

Frankly, any woman that uses income as a qualifier for a mate is setting themselves up for misery. It also makes me wonder what happens if they lose their job, do you leave them?

Most people in their early 30s are still getting their careers going. If you only want someone in their early 30s making over $150k now, it is a good chance that they are in employment that is unstable over the long term. But hey, instead of looking for a great person, keep trying to find that guy who has lots of disposable income and who's family has a beach house. I am sure that is going to work out for you very well.

[Anonymous]

Any quality 30+ guys left?

Right here. Want to go out? PM me a photo and I'll get back to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carefully look at your standards to see if you are being 1)realistic; 2)fair. Had a friend who wanted only hot, young, preppy southern boys yet was herself an average but judgmental wall flower. Average looks and intellect and watches TV as a main interest. Needless to say she was single and a virgin at 30.

Did she ever find someone?

Virgin at 30, sounds like that tv watching is a lot of Star Trek.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
A good catch:

- Has a respectable career earning a decent living = 150k+

I laffed. Not only did I laff, but I guffawed.

You think $150k+ a "decent" living. Your expectations are clearly out of whack.

Why don't you post a photo of yourself in this thread so we can determine whether you are not only worthy of a man making $150k but if you are capable of snagging one.

We'll be waiting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. What is your definition of a good catch?
2. Why objectify men by characterizing them as objects to be caught or acquired?

Common sense?

A good catch:

- Well rounded guy who comes from a good family
- Has a respectable career earning a decent living = 150k+
- Kind and generous
- Has interest and hobbies
- A good member of society


The 30 + single guys I know are either:

- Workaholics who have deep personality or commitment issues
- Loser underachievers who have low self esteem and will not amount to much

What do the two bold parts have anything to do with being a good catch or not unless you are looking for (you fill in the blank)

Do you think a guy who comes with an abusive or dysfunctional family and have them be your in laws is a valid arrangement? Do you want an ignorant grandmother for your kids or an alcoholic grandfather for them?

Do you really think a guy earning 50k at a think tank is a catch?

First, I guess you and I are thinking of two extremes in terms of "good family". I thought when saying good family = wealthy family based on the 150k requirement. Mea culpa. However, not being from a good family should not be a disqualifier, especially if the guy has all the other traits. This means he has the grit and discipline to be such a great guy despite having grown up in a dysfunctional family, and that only says more of his positive character more than anything else.

Second, the difference between 150k and 50k is stark. Anybody with some career ambition in the DC area will have a decent income, but that doesn't mean a 150k salary. If, for example, he is a fed employee, that'll mean he has to be near the top max payscale.

I just want to put a plug in for all of the single ladies out there to vet the family first. My DH exactly fits your bolded description and yes, we have persevered and have an awesome life, but it is no walk in the park dealing with a dysfunctional, good-for-nothing family, believe me.

This is OP.

The bad family is precisely why I broke up with my ex. We had issues but the crazy family bit was the nail in the coffin. The problem with this is that unless the person is extremely self aware and mature, he can be desensitized to a lot of crazy abnormal toxic behavior rampant in his family. I do not want to raise a family with someone who thinks having a smothering ignorant toxic mother is normal. Nor did I want my children to hear there grandfather get drunk and say irresponsible and mean things about minorities and the poor.

I'm sorry I just...couldn't. My number 1 requirement is that my children, if I should have some, grown up in a safe loving and enriching home with kind intelligent people.

Just spitballing here, but instead of further hurting your children by breaking up your family, instead you could've just taught them that grandma was a crazy racist that should be pitied?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
A good catch:

- Has a respectable career earning a decent living = 150k+

I laffed. Not only did I laff, but I guffawed.

You think $150k+ a "decent" living. Your expectations are clearly out of whack.

Why don't you post a photo of yourself in this thread so we can determine whether you are not only worthy of a man making $150k but if you are capable of snagging one.

We'll be waiting.

I laughed at this too. But thinking of it, perhaps OP also makes that much and she's probably looking for a mate who is the breadwinner in the relationship. This might also mean she's so overworked and career ambitious that it turns off a lot of the good catches she's referring to because she herself would not be compatible with the good catch qualities she enumerated. Overthinking this too much? Yes, I sure am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
A good catch:

- Has a respectable career earning a decent living = 150k+

I laffed. Not only did I laff, but I guffawed.

You think $150k+ a "decent" living. Your expectations are clearly out of whack.

Why don't you post a photo of yourself in this thread so we can determine whether you are not only worthy of a man making $150k but if you are capable of snagging one.

We'll be waiting.

I am a size 2, fit petite brunette who gets told she looks 25 and resembles Eva Longoria all the time. I love hiking, cats and lifting. I am great with children (neighborhood babysitter growing up) and have a Philosophy degree from Bryn Mawr. I do not earn a very good living and make 60k in fundraising. I do not think my requirements are outlandish. Everyone I know is married to guys with a similar profile.