Husband is not interested in being an uncle ... ?

[Anonymous]

How much of this issue over your niece is really a proxy for when/whether you two will have children of your own?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd think long and hard before having a child with this man, OP. My father wasn't into spending much time with children before his own but he always was kind and positive when interacting with them. Your DH is critical and controlling.

Oh please... Where did you get critical and controlling from? You're ridiculous. The man doesn't care much for someone else's baby. Not abnormal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some men aren't into babies. Some men aren't into other people's babies.

Honestly, I think you're spending more time with your family than I would be comfortable with if I were married to you.

Why is spending time with family an issue?

See the other thread about MIL wanting to be friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some men aren't into babies. Some men aren't into other people's babies.

Honestly, I think you're spending more time with your family than I would be comfortable with if I were married to you.

Why is spending time with family an issue?

You have a jealous spouse, OP. He will try to isolate you and your children from others. Not a good sign for future happiness.

Someone is projecting

+1 - where do these people make these assumptions from? She sees her family 2-3 times a week and he joins her weekly... where is the isolation and jealousy? He's just not into other people's children. I swear, some of these people on DCUM just need other people to have crappy lives to justify their own existence.

[Anonymous]

I am a woman and have a new nephew and two nieces. I wasn't that interested in my nieces until they were toddlers, and I have zero interest in my newborn nephew. Little babies are just not that interesting, and particularly other people's little babies.

[Anonymous]

OP here: Does he have any right to be upset when I ask him to buy things for my niece? When we were shopping the other day, he was shopping for himself and while he was at the register I added two more items for her. He got mad at me afterwards. The same thing happened last week while we were at the grocery store. I felt a little attacked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: Does he have any right to be upset when I ask him to buy things for my niece? When we were shopping the other day, he was shopping for himself and while he was at the register I added two more items for her. He got mad at me afterwards. The same thing happened last week while we were at the grocery store. I felt a little attacked.

Is this real? You feel attacked because he doesn't want to spend his money on your niece? Use your own money! You sound like an immature, selfish twit. Hopefully DH divorces you.

[Anonymous]

Women here. I'm always amazed by how pathetic some women are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here: Does he have any right to be upset when I ask him to buy things for my niece? When we were shopping the other day, he was shopping for himself and while he was at the register I added two more items for her. He got mad at me afterwards. The same thing happened last week while we were at the grocery store. I felt a little attacked.

Is this real? You feel attacked because he doesn't want to spend his money on your niece? Use your own money! You sound like an immature, selfish twit. Hopefully DH divorces you.

+1

I would also have been pissed that you ambushed me at the register by just throwing the items up there, expecting me to pay for them when you knew that I was shopping for something for myself and paying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here: Does he have any right to be upset when I ask him to buy things for my niece? When we were shopping the other day, he was shopping for himself and while he was at the register I added two more items for her. He got mad at me afterwards. The same thing happened last week while we were at the grocery store. I felt a little attacked.

Is this real? You feel attacked because he doesn't want to spend his money on your niece? Use your own money! You sound like an immature, selfish twit. Hopefully DH divorces you.

He has the RIGHT to feel any damn way he wants. Everyone has that RIGHT. You seem like a crappy wife and person. Not everyone is going to feel the same way that you feel about things - that doesn't make them bad people. It simply means they have different interests. Your expectation that he jump up and down for joy when he is with YOUR family and YOUR niece is selfish and your thoughts that he is obligated to buy YOUR niece things is equally as selfish.

[Anonymous]

Lol you sound like a nightmare! Run DH, run!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That doesn't sound like such a big deal to me. As PP said, some people just aren't into kids.

I had never even held a baby until the doctor handed me my newborn

- signed a lady who never liked kids until she had one of her own.

Same with me and my husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some men aren't into babies. Some men aren't into other people's babies.

Honestly, I think you're spending more time with your family than I would be comfortable with if I were married to you.

Why is spending time with family an issue?

Not the PP but you spend time with your family 2-3 times per week and he already spends time with them weekly. That is a lot. Not everyone wants that level of interaction and I don't get the sense you ever asked him what he is comfortable with. How much does he see his family and how much do you see them? You may have different expectations. I also wouldn't be surprised - speculating here - that once you do have kids, he will want to limit how much your family is involved in your day-to-day lives.

Honestly, I agree. That's a lot of time with your family, OP.

Way too much. My dh did this when we first got married, maybe twice a week. Finally I had it, we ended up moving over a hour away and improved our marriage. Yes OP why don't you guys have kids if you like them so much??

Also, that's your family not his. Not his niece.

[Anonymous]

My BIL was like this, barely spoke to my kids. He basically ignored them. Not going to lie it pissed me off and made me not like him. I was upset that he seemed to favor his sisters children which is fine but at least pretend to have some interest (like when they call your name and you don't respond?) But after a few years my sister (he's my twin sisters husband) got pregnant he was super excited and when his son was born he started to be more attentive and just better at faking interest. He is a really good dad, a so so uncle. My husband is both great dad and uncle to my sisters DS. I wish he was better but it's much better now! Some people just have very little interest in kids that aren't their own blood.

[Anonymous]

I love my own kids, but am not necessarily crazy about other people's.

Also, you spend a LOT of time with your family. Good grief.