Would like to hear from late 50, 60-somethings with teens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

Hope that works out for you.

LOL!! Life has a funny way of not working out the way you expect. That is all.

Why all the backlash over this comment? I thought it was fine. Not everyone has to live the same life you do, on the same schedule.

NP, but it struck me the wrong way too. OP is worried about something and asking for the perspective of other parents. PP doesn't have that perspective, so she probably should have stayed out of it. Instead, she decided to comment about how her (PP's) plan is so much better and she won't have to worry at all about the thing that OP is worrying about. Plus, the smugness.

+1

And it does nothing to address the OP's request.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

Hope that works out for you.

LOL!! Life has a funny way of not working out the way you expect. That is all.

Why all the backlash over this comment? I thought it was fine. Not everyone has to live the same life you do, on the same schedule.

NP, but it struck me the wrong way too. OP is worried about something and asking for the perspective of other parents. PP doesn't have that perspective, so she probably should have stayed out of it. Instead, she decided to comment about how her (PP's) plan is so much better and she won't have to worry at all about the thing that OP is worrying about. Plus, the smugness.

+1

And it does nothing to address the OP's request.

Eh, I think some of you need to lighten up. Sometimes I think the idea of being able to retire early and not deal with middle school drama as a 55-year-old is quite appealing, but that's not what I chose. There's no reason to be butt hurt over it.

[Anonymous]

I'm in the same boat OP (or will be.)

I'm just hoping that we can maintain good health well into our 70's so that our kids can make it to their 30's before losing us (or having to deal w/ too much sandwich generation stuff.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

Hope that works out for you.

LOL!! Life has a funny way of not working out the way you expect. That is all.

Why all the backlash over this comment? I thought it was fine. Not everyone has to live the same life you do, on the same schedule.

m

Saying "I couldn't imagine" about someone else's life circumstances is never going to come across all that well. Surely you can see that.

I personally not have kids at home in my late 50s or early 60s. But it's not so utterly horrific it's unimaginable, is it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

Hope that works out for you.

LOL!! Life has a funny way of not working out the way you expect. That is all.

Why all the backlash over this comment? I thought it was fine. Not everyone has to live the same life you do, on the same schedule.

m

Saying "I couldn't imagine" about someone else's life circumstances is never going to come across all that well. Surely you can see that.

I personally not have kids at home in my late 50s or early 60s. But it's not so utterly horrific it's unimaginable, is it?

Not that mention "it takes a special kind"? What is that supposed to mean? It's actually pretty normal to have teens in your fifties.

[Anonymous]

I'm 51 with two teens, life with them is physically less challenging than it used to be but mentally a bit more challenging. Now I worry about them, want to help them make the right choices, grades are more important, etc.
They are fun and sweet about 90% of the time and can be a bit flip and moody the other 10%. Some days I wish they could be 5 again and they'd want to hang out with me more. My 17 y.o. will head off to college next year and I'll miss him terribly. All in, it's great and I couldn't imagine life any other way.

[Anonymous]

NP. It is tiring but my child was worth the wait. I only wish he knew me when I had at least a smattering of energy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

We did that in our 20s as singles and our 30s together. I see my parents limping along on retirement cruises and I didn't want to do that. But as others have said, people have different time lines.

Go to China and Egpyt, two of my favorites. Enjoy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

I'm 53 and can't imagine a better life than I have right now with my DH and our two teenagers (and our dog ). Thank you for the well wishes!

Agree! I couldn't imagine wasting my 20s being married and pregnant. That was for drinking and drugs!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

I'm 53 and can't imagine a better life than I have right now with my DH and our two teenagers (and our dog ). Thank you for the well wishes!

Agree! I couldn't imagine wasting my 20s being married and pregnant. That was for drinking and drugs!

+1

[Anonymous]

Fifty five with a fourteen year old DD. My advice, stay on top of technology, know the social media sites or whatever they are by the time your children get to this age. Demand to be a friend on everything your kids are on, exhausting but necessary. Remember you will be the one to teach them proper usage of Internet and such, take it seriously especially with teenagers. Also, read everything, book stores are your friend. There's so much valuable information to absorb in our ever changing world, especially with adolescents. Finally, enjoy them. DH and I are having the time of our lives with our teen, she keeps us laughing and keeps things in proper perspective. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. When we're about 53, the plan is that DH and I are retiring and cruising the islands.

Good luck to all of you older parents on here! It takes a special kind. I couldn't imagine.

Hope that works out for you.

LOL!! Life has a funny way of not working out the way you expect. That is all.

Why all the backlash over this comment? I thought it was fine. Not everyone has to live the same life you do, on the same schedule.

Because the comment was sanctimonious and condescending - of the "bless your heart, you old farts" variety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[/b]We will be in our early-mid 50s when our kids are in middle/high school so this thread is of interest to me. I often joke that I will be so deaf and senile by then that I won't be able to head my kids sneaking in/out of the house...but seriously I am nervous, mostly about retirement and college happening so close together.

[b]We want to retire (and are financially planning to do so) in our late 60s, but know that our kids will likely just be finishing college. We want to be able to help them out as needed when they first start out in the world...but we also want to retire!

I'm confused as to why you think kids who will be in middle & high school when you are in your early-mid 50s will likely not finish college until you are in your late 60s. Do you expect them to take multiple gap years or take several extra years to graduate from college or something?

[Anonymous]

I know a couple who adopted a newborn when the wife was 50, and the husband a little older.

I hope their energy doesn't flag...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:60 years old with a 22-year-old. Trying to remember back to high school. I don't think that sleep and energy were the issues so much as facing dd's very serious emotional problems from which she was just starting to emerge when she was sexually assaulted at school and things spiraled down again.

You don't lose sleep because they wake you up in the middle of the night. You lose sleep due to worry. Glad to say that she is doing very well now but her adolescence was very tough. Keep an eye out for emotional problems and be willing to get your kid the help they need.

+100 But not to the sexual assault. I am sorry PP your DD went through that. But keep your eyes open for sign of stress from the ridiculous pressure that is put on HS students now. Be prepared to act quickly with support. You will regret it later if you dont. And be careful of HS sports -- there are so many injuries.