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If you knew then what you know now, would you have married your husband? had kids?
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Anonymous
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Anonymous
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I wish I had never dated my husband, much less ever married him. My first clue was my golden retriever didn't like him (?!). My second was my son (5) didn't like him. I figured they just didn't know him yet. Guess I was the one who took more time to figure him out. They had him pegged at hello.
But... I don't regret my kids. So, I compare it to walking into and through Hell to get my kids, who I would give anything for. For that reason only, it was worth the time I spent with my husband, but I can't get divorced from him fast enough now. |
Anonymous
| I have to say yes, I'd do it over again, but that doesn't mean we're growing together or happier than we were pre-kids. We definitely were happier pre-kids, but that's not DH's fault. I am so grateful for my children, and I have DH to thank for them. I've also been happiest with DH, so that counts for something. But there have been hard times, and when things get really bad, I wonder whether I might have made another choice. But deep down, I don't regret marrying DH. I thought you'd stop growing when you hit, uh, maybe 35, but I keep learning, and life keeps changing. It's much harder than I expected it to be, and I have regrets, just not about marrying DH. |
Anonymous
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OP, my husband is as you describe yours.
The kids, I love. Wish I had more. Too old now. But wish I had a husband who could have supported the child bearing. |
Anonymous
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Absolutely not. My husband has turned out to be a selfish jerk who is cranky, irritable, negative and sucks the fun out of everything. He watches TV constantly and now my 3 year is addicted. He curses when he loses his cool, including the f word in front of our kid. He goes out playing sports 4 times a week and drinks after with buddies and then drives home. Whenhe drinks he can't stop. I am horrified and hope he gets arrested for DWI so that he learns a lesson.
Did I know this when I married him? Probably ignored some signs. |
Anonymous
| We have been together 23 years married 17 with 3 kids. i would marry him again and again. I fell in love the day we started going out and never stopped. |
Anonymous
me too! My respect/love for him grows daily especially as I watch him interact with our 3 boys. I am sitting here watching them out the window, my husband came home with this monstrosity of a waterslide one of those blow-up things-it is HUGE and the 4 of them are out there playing. So perfect. |
Anonymous
| Yes. I am unbelievably fortunate to be married to this man, and to have the child we have. Twenty years later, I know that this marriage was the best decision I could have made. |
Anonymous
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Wow some of you guys are so lucky!!!
as for me, I curse the day that I took him back after I broke up with him for cheating on me. the only good thing is my beautiful son and the one due in Dec. I think he is cheating on me again.... |
Anonymous
| We've been married 9 years, together for almost 13. He is the center of my world, I love him so much. The arrival of our son 10 months ago has only made us happier. I thank my lucky stars every day. |
Anonymous
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Yes I would do it again. My husband is my best friend and we don't have sex as much as we did at first but I'm still attracted to him.
I thought it would take me longer to get pregnant so I built in extra time, but we got pregnant right away. It freaked me out at first but I'm so glad now. I was 32. If there were guarantees I might have waited until later, but who knows - there are no guarantees. |
Anonymous
| I'm not sure. I love my husband, we've been together 14 years, married 8. I can't imagine life without him or my two sons. But neither of us is that happy... I think if I could do it over again I'd take more time to do therapy and get my own life in order before getting married. I kind of ran away from some problems by marrying him, and it's affected the marriage. And he has some unresolved issues from before the marriage that he has no interest in working on right now. It's taken me a long time to grow up and get over the expectation that marriage == happily ever after. |
Anonymous
| Good Lord. You people have absolutely no idea about sacrifices. Married hubby (many) years ago. Waited (many) years to have kids. If you measure "success" by money, you would have never married my husband, but now we have done better than anyone we know (I'll leave it at that, to your chagrin). He drove a run down, leaking "least glamorous" car barely held together, but I liked the kind of person he was and what he had to offer. NOT what I thought he would make in XXX years. Holy moly! Can you say "shallow"!!?? As for the age debate, I have a friend who blames all her bad choices and laziness to her being an "older parent" - WTF? Aren't we mostly older in this area - having worked for what we have, at least I would hope! Maybe we're lucky, we both believe in sacrificing for what we have and sacrificing for long term happiness. A word you don't hear too much about here. Therapy is in fact, for everyone. |
Anonymous
| I have a wonderful husband and family. BUT, now that I know myself so much better than when we started dating many years ago, I've realized what I've often suspected. We aren't really right for each other and I don't think I make him any happier than he makes me. We try to make it work, but I don't know if it will last forever and I'm not sure what to do about it. |
Anonymous
good luck in finding someone that doesn't burp, fart, or clear their throat! |