What is important more than anything is that they are loved. Who cares if it's 2 moms or 2 dads? Who cares if they're divorced and a single mother or father? You'll find same sex couples everywhere - Potomac, Sidwell etc. It's not GDS, it's reality and there's absolutely nothing wrong. |
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At least in DC, but I'm guessing it's true in the burbs too, every independent school has multiple families who are two-dad or two-mom families (as well as one-parent families, blended families, families with adopted children, minority families, multiracial families, multigenerational families, non-English speaking as a first language families, and of course, one-mom one-dad white families with their birth children). Whether teachers acknowledge it or not, the kids notice each others' families---and that is A-OK. And if the teacher lets all kids know that all of their families are good, special, and loving, that affirmation is even better for everyone.
And it is not just DC independents, you'll find the same diversity of families in DC area publics, charters, and day care centers. That's life in 2016 for our children, and it's all good! |
| My kids go to a suburban public school, and a few years ago I overheard a debate among kindergarten kids working at their table about whether or not a boy could marry a boy. It went on for several minutes, and the teacher was not involved and not an instigator. Whether or not these issues are being discussed in school, kids will pick up on them. |
| My kid learned about families with two moms very early, at his Catholic daycare. |
| My K daughter was delighted to learn that women can marry woman because she wants to marry her best friend when she grows up. |
The school talked very formerly about different families. I support same sex marriage, but I am not sure I would like my 6 years old in a school which emphasize this in the curriculum. |
| My 3 year old wants to marry her 2 year old sister. I think, in her mind, getting married is simply about who you want to spend time with. |
You sound unbalanced. Do you mean "very formally" such as in a classroom setting? Why wouldn't they discuss the reality of family structures? With your preferred way, they would avoid discussing the family composition of actual members of the class, which would create an exclusionary culture or relegate these children to being "others." You want to do that to young children. |
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Many young children want to marry their 'best friend' when they're 3 or 4 (or 5)...our son did in Pre-K, when his sister (one year older) asked who he wanted to marry...our son said 'so and so' (his best friend) and my daughter said 'you can't marry him, he's a boy' ...
Which was a wonderful segue into my son's response: "X has two dads, so of course I can marry a boy!' I kept out of it...children say so many things when they are little...and it's pure and honest and beautiful, those words... Don't worry so much! |
| Well if it's any consolation my non-GDS PreK DD asked me yesterday if girls can marry each other. There are no same sex families in our school. I said yes and left it at that. I honestly think this question stems from role play at school where two friends want to "marry" each other and another child says they can't. Do I think PreK and K are to young for an "education" in same sex marriage, yes. Do I think a simple answer of yes is sufficient, yes. No need to get into a moral debate. FWIW my DS asked the same question at the same time at the same school and I gave him the same answer. He now attends school with ss families and it's a non-issue. Some kids have two dads, some two moms, some two of each and others one of each. No big deal. |
| And you chose GDS, knowing that they are manic about stuff like this, because....? |
Actually, some of us think there is. |
And you are on the wrong side of history. But seriously, if your young (ages 4-6) child had a friend with 2 moms or 2 dads and had a question about it, how would you respond? |
I've always loved this line. As if this is how we should base moral decisions. I'm sure in 1938 Germany, people were telling non-Nazis that they were "on the wrong side of history" as well. But since you brought up a more serious question.... My first response is to do or say nothing. When DD was 4, she really didn't even notice this difference about one of her friends/ classmates. She played at the child's house and "Miss X" or "Miss Y" were always around but frankly, I don't think she caught the difference between most other houses where, say, a mom and nanny were also home all the time. She's a little older now and the friendship with that particular child has faded somewhat because of a move, so we're really not in as much contact. With my older kids, it has only come up briefly. I have said – briefly, without a lot of fanfare -- that yes, there are families that are constructed in this way (two moms/ two dads) and that I personally do not approve of it, but that the people are lovely and should be treated as such. So far, that's been the extent of it. |
| I'm seriously grateful that each of my kids had classmates with same-sex parents in PK3. Made it a total non-issue. |