Dating app lands teen on sex offenders list after girl lied about her age

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're talking about a 14 year old here. I don't care how old she looked, a 14 year old is very, very different from a 19 year old. A 14 year old is still a child in many ways and has the thought processes of a child. I would hope that our society would place the protection of children high on its list of priorities.

Sorry, we're more concerned with making sure men can put their penises where they want consequence-free.

How does the sentence given to this boy protect children?

[Anonymous]

This story was on the news yesterday and it was stated that he can't live at home because his 15 year old brother lives at home and he can not live with a minor. The news piece also said that he can not go to the mall because kids go there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're talking about a 14 year old here. I don't care how old she looked, a 14 year old is very, very different from a 19 year old. A 14 year old is still a child in many ways and has the thought processes of a child. I would hope that our society would place the protection of children high on its list of priorities.

Physically, there may be very little if any difference between a 14 yo and a 19 yo. Emotionally, sure. But...I could see me as a 18/19 yo missing the clues that she was only 14...it happened. I did not sleep with her, and was 18, but we would have.

It doesn't matter what a 14 year old looks like. Our society believes that children deserve the protection of the law. A 14 year old could proclaim loudly that he or she is 25 and that would not matter because we have laws in place to protect children.

When I was in my mid to late teens, every young man I knew became very careful about who he went out with the minute he turned 18. We were all very aware of age of consent laws and very aware of the line between 18 and younger than 18. It would surprise me that young people today would be unaware of these laws.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're talking about a 14 year old here. I don't care how old she looked, a 14 year old is very, very different from a 19 year old. A 14 year old is still a child in many ways and has the thought processes of a child. I would hope that our society would place the protection of children high on its list of priorities.

Sorry, we're more concerned with making sure men can put their penises where they want consequence-free.

How does the sentence given to this boy protect children?

Cases like this have a deterrence value. It encourages other people to be more careful about making sure the people they're having sex with aren't children.

[Anonymous]

I have a DD and DS. The girl bears some responsibility here. Yes, she is only 14. But at that age she knows right from wrong. She's 14, not 7. She lied about her age, and went on an app that is not meant for underage kids. I think girls who do this type of thing should also be punished some how, like doing community service. Poor guy's life is now ruined.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

PP here. I want to add that this is a tricky area. Some form of call out may be appropriate, but sex offender list and jail for a first offense is ridiculous. There is no evidence that he is a predator. The burden of proof should be, was it reasonable to assume she was of age -- base it on physical appearance and what they said.

Wait, what? It's ok to have sex with a 12-year-old, if you think that the 12-year-old looks like the 12-year-old is 17, and the 12-year-old said that the 12-year-old is 17?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a DD and DS. The girl bears some responsibility here. Yes, she is only 14. But at that age she knows right from wrong. She's 14, not 7. She lied about her age, and went on an app that is not meant for underage kids. I think girls who do this type of thing should also be punished some how, like doing community service. Poor guy's life is now ruined.

No, that us not how it works. In the eyes of the law, a 14 year old is a child and is incapable of giving consent. Our laws are set up to protect children.

A 19 year old is an adult. Young men (and women) need to be aware of these laws and be very careful in these circumstances. It does not matter if the younger person lies about his or her age. We consider children to be to young to give legal consent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a DD and DS. The girl bears some responsibility here. Yes, she is only 14. But at that age she knows right from wrong. She's 14, not 7. She lied about her age, and went on an app that is not meant for underage kids. I think girls who do this type of thing should also be punished some how, like doing community service. Poor guy's life is now ruined.

The courts are not there to determine right from wrong. They are there to determine legal from illegal. It is not illegal for a 14-year-old to misrepresent her age on a dating app or (as far as I know) to use a dating app. It is illegal for a 19-year-old to have sexual contact with a 14-year-old.

Now, if you want to change the laws to make it illegal for a 14-year-old to misrepresent her age on a dating app...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're talking about a 14 year old here. I don't care how old she looked, a 14 year old is very, very different from a 19 year old. A 14 year old is still a child in many ways and has the thought processes of a child. I would hope that our society would place the protection of children high on its list of priorities.

Sorry, we're more concerned with making sure men can put their penises where they want consequence-free.

How does the sentence given to this boy protect children?

Cases like this have a deterrence value. It encourages other people to be more careful about making sure the people they're having sex with aren't children.

+1.

Also, the 19 year old is not a boy. He is a young man and a legal adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

PP here. I want to add that this is a tricky area. Some form of call out may be appropriate, but sex offender list and jail for a first offense is ridiculous. There is no evidence that he is a predator. The burden of proof should be, was it reasonable to assume she was of age -- base it on physical appearance and what they said.

Wait, what? It's ok to have sex with a 12-year-old, if you think that the 12-year-old looks like the 12-year-old is 17, and the 12-year-old said that the 12-year-old is 17?

I did not say it is ok...only that there is an intention. It should be illegal intend to have sex with a 12 yo. If someone tells me they are 18, they look 18, is it reasonable to assume they are 18? Or do I need to card them? What if they have a fake id? The burden should be on what a reasonable person would think.

I do not think anyone would confuse an 11 yo for a 16 yo, for example. But I can see (physically) mistaking a 14 yo for a 17 yo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

PP here. I want to add that this is a tricky area. Some form of call out may be appropriate, but sex offender list and jail for a first offense is ridiculous. There is no evidence that he is a predator. The burden of proof should be, was it reasonable to assume she was of age -- base it on physical appearance and what they said.

Wait, what? It's ok to have sex with a 12-year-old, if you think that the 12-year-old looks like the 12-year-old is 17, and the 12-year-old said that the 12-year-old is 17?

I did not say it is ok...only that there is an intention. It should be illegal intend to have sex with a 12 yo. If someone tells me they are 18, they look 18, is it reasonable to assume they are 18? Or do I need to card them? What if they have a fake id? The burden should be on what a reasonable person would think.

I do not think anyone would confuse an 11 yo for a 16 yo, for example. But I can see (physically) mistaking a 14 yo for a 17 yo.

In other words, it should be legal to have sex with a 12-year-old if a reasonable person would think that the 12-year-old was 18?

Yikes.

Here's an idea: if you're not 100% certain that the person you're planning to have sex with is over the age of consent, don't have sex with them -- or do, and risk the consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

PP here. I want to add that this is a tricky area. Some form of call out may be appropriate, but sex offender list and jail for a first offense is ridiculous. There is no evidence that he is a predator. The burden of proof should be, was it reasonable to assume she was of age -- base it on physical appearance and what they said.

Wait, what? It's ok to have sex with a 12-year-old, if you think that the 12-year-old looks like the 12-year-old is 17, and the 12-year-old said that the 12-year-old is 17?

I did not say it is ok...only that there is an intention. It should be illegal intend to have sex with a 12 yo. If someone tells me they are 18, they look 18, is it reasonable to assume they are 18? Or do I need to card them? What if they have a fake id? The burden should be on what a reasonable person would think.

I do not think anyone would confuse an 11 yo for a 16 yo, for example. But I can see (physically) mistaking a 14 yo for a 17 yo.

It does not matter if someone could mistake a 14 year old for a 17 year old. The legal burden is on the adult in these cases, not the child. The child is legally incapable of giving consent, even if she is wearing a boatload of makeup and lying about her age. She does not have to legal ability to give consent.

That is the law and every young man I knew when I was that age was well aware of it. Thus the term "jailbait."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

PP here. I want to add that this is a tricky area. Some form of call out may be appropriate, but sex offender list and jail for a first offense is ridiculous. There is no evidence that he is a predator. The burden of proof should be, was it reasonable to assume she was of age -- base it on physical appearance and what they said.

Wait, what? It's ok to have sex with a 12-year-old, if you think that the 12-year-old looks like the 12-year-old is 17, and the 12-year-old said that the 12-year-old is 17?

I did not say it is ok...only that there is an intention. It should be illegal intend to have sex with a 12 yo. If someone tells me they are 18, they look 18, is it reasonable to assume they are 18? Or do I need to card them? What if they have a fake id? The burden should be on what a reasonable person would think.

I do not think anyone would confuse an 11 yo for a 16 yo, for example. But I can see (physically) mistaking a 14 yo for a 17 yo.

In other words, it should be legal to have sex with a 12-year-old if a reasonable person would think that the 12-year-old was 18?

Yikes.

Here's an idea: if you're not 100% certain that the person you're planning to have sex with is over the age of consent, don't have sex with them -- or do, and risk the consequences.

Not PP. But I think if the 12-year old went to some length to present themselves as 18. If they presented a fake ID, if they had social media that stated they were 18, etc.

Yes. I think if the older child (it could be a boy or a girl, btw) went through a reasonable amount of steps to confirm the age of the younger person then yes, I don't think the older person should NOT be prosecuted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The girl and her mother testified that he shouldn't be placed on a sex offender list.

Doesn't matter. Legally, a 14 year old is incapable of giving consent. A 14 year old is a child.

No kidding, but he did not know this. And if she is trolling for guys on the internet, I'm sure her actions did not seem like that of a 14 yr old to another teenager.
It would be different if it was a 40 year old who was out looking for a 16 yr old.
Geez, I am in my 40's, I have a 9 yr old who is taller than me and folks have thought she was older than she is since she was 2!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The girl and her mother testified that he shouldn't be placed on a sex offender list.

Doesn't matter. Legally, a 14 year old is incapable of giving consent. A 14 year old is a child.

No kidding, but he did not know this. And if she is trolling for guys on the internet, I'm sure her actions did not seem like that of a 14 yr old to another teenager.
It would be different if it was a 40 year old who was out looking for a 16 yr old.
Geez, I am in my 40's, I have a 9 yr old who is taller than me and folks have thought she was older than she is since she was 2!

It doesn't matter. A 14 year old is legally a child and cannot give legal consent. We have these laws specifically because it is sometimes hard to tell how old someone is, so it is legally rape to have rape with a child, no matter what he or she says, does, or looks like.