Reassure me - 4 year old has ZERO interest in learning to read / write

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Set up an appointment with a pediatric opthalmologist. She may be having vision issues.

I thought the same thing. My older DD still doesn't like reason for this reason.

[Anonymous]

OP, because you refer to your child as a 4 year old and not an "almost 5 year old" I am going to assume she has another whole year before K. Not having any interest in reading or writing is COMPLETELY developmentally appropriate. And because you say she is in "pre-K," I am assuming this is a daycare where you move rooms based on age and it may even be that some of her "classmates" are going to K this year. Either way, a kid who is a full year away from entering Kindergarten who can read 50 sight words is not the norm--nor is it uncommon, but definitely not the expectation. Does she recognize her letters. Does she know what sound any of them make? Can she spell her name? Does she recognize her name?

[Anonymous]

My DD just finished kindergarten in a class full of high-SES kids. (Just so you know that her classmates are not disadvantaged.) ONE kid started the year as a real reader. (It wasn't my kid!) By the end of the year, I'd say almost all of the kids were about where you describe the PK norm at your school. My DD just turned six and only read her first chapter book yesterday.

All this is to say that a non-reading 4-year-old is not only OK, it's to be expected.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your preK is not developmentally appropriate if they are expecting four year olds to read and write.

You need to lay off the tiger momness

+1.

If your child is growing up in a highly literate household-- if you model and share a love of reading and talking about books-- there is no need to try to force handwriting and decoding skills earlier. There is no advantage to being able to decode what you cannot understand, in any case, so at this age and earlier my biggest focus is on expanding a child's vocabulary and comprehension through lots of great stories and conversation and questions. This would be my biggest concern at preschool, too: that there are a variety of opportunities throughout the day for your child to be exposed to different experiences that will facilitate her understanding of the things she will learn and read in the future.

[Anonymous]

Posts like this make me realize that I am maybe better off as a SN mom. I feel like since we are dealing with real issues- we don't make up other ones.

[Anonymous]

I would place her in an academic preschool - our child gained so much from being with other kids and their teaching style. We supplement at home. Start with the Leap Frog and Preschool Prep videos. Far better than cartoons. You can place them on the iPad so she can watch them easily.

[Anonymous]

Everyone is different. I wouldn't worry until 2nd grade. Until then focus on making the child see reading as a pleasurable thing. My friend freaked out about her 4yo and had a reading tutor for him. My kid was like yours and now his nose in a book ... A LOT. My friend's kid not so much. My kid could read logo's non-word reading, and loved reading pictures in books until 1st grade, then suddenly reading took off, and he is doing very well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would place her in an academic preschool - our child gained so much from being with other kids and their teaching style. We supplement at home. Start with the Leap Frog and Preschool Prep videos. Far better than cartoons. You can place them on the iPad so she can watch them easily.

LOL, is this a joke?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is unreal. Now you need reassurance because your 4 year old can't read 50 sight words???

Um, no. I would like reassurance that her total lack of interest isn't something to be concerned about. Reading comprehension is a beautiful thing.

Thanks for playing. You can check off your "posted useless and nasty response" box now.

You will get lots and lots of responses saying you are being over the top and silly for worrying and every kid catches up etc.

but I will go against the grain and say my kid was like this and the end result has been a struggle over the years. If I could go back, I would really have worked harder on phonics and letter recognition. I mean really worked every day on these.

But her kid isn't behind!!!!!! That's the point people are making. Her child is perfectly normal and doesn't need to "catch up". Working every day on phonics and letter recognition with a 4 year old who is not showing interest in these things on her own will be counter productive. Any educator or early literacy expert will tell you this. Children pick up these skills at different rates which is perfectly normal.

Crap like this makes me want to move back to the small town I grew up in. People here are flat out nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't see a "total lack of interest" in a child who enjoys being read to and creates narratives from pictures. Developing language is more important than reading or writing at this age.

100% agree

Another totally agreeing with this.

Don't worry OP - your daughter is fine. Worry in 12 months if you're not seeing some basic reading, but not now.

[Anonymous]

OP, there are kids who show up to K and have never been in a formal school setting. Who have never been read to at all. There are kids who literally don't know which way is up on a picture book until K. They will hold the book upside down if it's handed to them. Here is what some of the rich and highly literate parents don't seem to understand...all of your children will be fine given the early literacy rich environments they are being raised in (aren't they lucky) and barring any learning disabilities, they will ALL learn to read and write. So take a deep breath and relax and ease up.

[Anonymous]

OP please learn from my mistakes. Back off of your child now. You are going to instill a hatred of reading and learning that will never go away. I know you are anxious--btdt--years of looping therapy, tutors in kindergarden crazy flash cards--don't do it. Let it come naturally. Just read to them. By the time they get to school, they will be assessed properly--trust the process. (assuming you are in a decent public school district)

Signed mom of teen who almost wrecked her relationship with her son by pushing him too hard too early and regrets it dearly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never been overly concerned with my DD's ability to read sight words or write out letters, thinking that she'll show interest once her classmates and school time focus on these things more intently. But learned from DD's pre K teachers that many of her classmates - most of her classmates - are writing letters fairly well and many are actually reading sight words, upwards of 50 or so according to DD's teachers.

She is still in pre-K so I'm trying not to stress, but DD shows absolutely no interest in these things. She does love books and enjoys being read to and "reading" (she can spend hours looking at books and creating a narrative for what's on the page). But we try and encourage writing and sight words at home and it's of no interest and DH and I don't want to force it.

Reassure me that this isn't an issue. I'm no tiger mom, just concerned that DD is ready for kindergarten. Also sort of sad that she doesn't seem to have the curiosity to learn to write and actually read at this point (I remember being thrilled to learn my letters, etc).

It isn't clear from your post - does she have another year in preK or is she going to K in the fall?

[Anonymous]

OP, my sister has served as the school-wide gifted and talented coordinator at elementary, middle and high school levels in a major Virginia school district. In a recent conversation, she said that reading anytime up until age 7 or 8 is completely, totally normal. Her advice to me is to read to you kids, talk to them about what we read, and leave the rest alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would place her in an academic preschool - our child gained so much from being with other kids and their teaching style. We supplement at home. Start with the Leap Frog and Preschool Prep videos. Far better than cartoons. You can place them on the iPad so she can watch them easily.

She clearly is in an academic preschool if they're pushing sight words, and she's a good example of why such programs are bad for children. OP needs to move her to a quality program.