Do you ever wish your DH made more money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I make my own money. Do you have a high paying career yourself?

No. But by the looks of it, I probably will have to if I want to give my children the life I envision.

So get out there and do it. I will confess that money is important to me. I got an MBA from a top school to make sure I could support what I wanted.

Oh nice. What do you do now and how much do you make?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I make my own money. Do you have a high paying career yourself?

No. But by the looks of it, I probably will have to if I want to give my children the life I envision.

Why did you assume you wouldn't have to do so? I'm guessing you were born in the 1970s. I was born in the 1960s and always assumed I couldn't rely on a man for money. DH and I make about the same amount.

16:35 here. Also born in the 60s. Maybe it really is a generation thing.

[Anonymous]

What a revolting post.

[Anonymous]

Do I wish we just magically had more money? sure.

Do I resent my husband for not making more? No way.


I know that a spouse who is "sweet, kind, and gentle" and prioritizes fulfilling work over $$$ is worth a ton more than a few extra bucks in the bank or a nicer house.


I'm currently a SAHM but used to work, even when he did not. I don't let myself dwell on materialism and superficial signifiers of happiness. I'm smart enough to know better.

[Anonymous]

I don't feel this way but we were both well off when we got married. I was a little surprised when he wanted to quit Big Law and open his own firm and keep the hours more reasonable so he could spend more time with the kids.

He earns less for sure, and I might feel differently if we weren't wealthy OR I weren't working but since I do work full time and we're getting health insurance through me, it's fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am married to an adorable man who is sweet, kind and gentle. Despite his smarts, he isn't very financially motivated and chooses to pursue work that is "fun" and "interesting". I love him a lot, but resent that marrying him means we won't have the life I envisioned; nice house; private school for the children; being a stay at home mother, etc.

Am I wrong to feel this way?Does anyone else secretly wish this too? Did you consider your husband's financial prospects before saying " I do"?

Try golddiggers-match.com

[Anonymous]

No. He's a great guy, great husband, great dad. If I want more money I'll make it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't feel this way but we were both well off when we got married. I was a little surprised when he wanted to quit Big Law and open his own firm and keep the hours more reasonable so he could spend more time with the kids.

He earns less for sure, and I might feel differently if we weren't wealthy OR I weren't working but since I do work full time and we're getting health insurance through me, it's fine.

I'd think you'd be happy he made that choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am married to an adorable man who is sweet, kind and gentle. Despite his smarts, he isn't very financially motivated and chooses to pursue work that is "fun" and "interesting". I love him a lot, but resent that marrying him means we won't have the life I envisioned; nice house; private school for the children; being a stay at home mother, etc.

Am I wrong to feel this way?Does anyone else secretly wish this too? Did you consider your husband's financial prospects before saying " I do"?

So, the man was the plan and you chose wrong?

Yeah, I guess the man was plan A...now I need a plan B. I'm not averse to earning my own money, it'll just be hard once the kids come around. I really wanted to give them a 100% of my focus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I make my own money. Do you have a high paying career yourself?

No. But by the looks of it, I probably will have to if I want to give my children the life I envision.

Why did you assume you wouldn't have to do so? I'm guessing you were born in the 1970s. I was born in the 1960s and always assumed I couldn't rely on a man for money. DH and I make about the same amount.

16:35 here. Also born in the 60s. Maybe it really is a generation thing.

I'm a 70s hatchling, and I would NEVER rely on my husband to "give me a better life". I want a certain life (or anything), I am capable enough to go and earn it my darned self.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am married to an adorable man who is sweet, kind and gentle. Despite his smarts, he isn't very financially motivated and chooses to pursue work that is "fun" and "interesting". I love him a lot, but resent that marrying him means we won't have the life I envisioned; nice house; private school for the children; being a stay at home mother, etc.

Am I wrong to feel this way?Does anyone else secretly wish this too? Did you consider your husband's financial prospects before saying " I do"?

So, the man was the plan and you chose wrong?

Yeah, I guess the man was plan A...now I need a plan B. I'm not averse to earning my own money, it'll just be hard once the kids come around. I really wanted to give them a 100% of my focus.

Based on your values, I think it may be for the best that you're not getting what you want.

[Anonymous]

I make a decent amount of money and support our family, and DH makes very little. I get resentful because I always thought that either he would make enough so that I could go PT, or we would have enough money to really live well. Instead, I work FT, but his hours are worse than mine, so I also do the majority of the child-related things, and we don't get to go on vacation often because I need to work so much. Its very stressful being basically the sold source of income, not something I ever thought I would do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am married to an adorable man who is sweet, kind and gentle. Despite his smarts, he isn't very financially motivated and chooses to pursue work that is "fun" and "interesting". I love him a lot, but resent that marrying him means we won't have the life I envisioned; nice house; private school for the children; being a stay at home mother, etc.

Am I wrong to feel this way?Does anyone else secretly wish this too? Did you consider your husband's financial prospects before saying " I do"?

So, the man was the plan and you chose wrong?

Yeah, I guess the man was plan A...now I need a plan B. I'm not averse to earning my own money, it'll just be hard once the kids come around. I really wanted to give them a 100% of my focus.

Wait - you don't have kids yet and you aren't earning your own money?? And you are complaining about your life??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I make a decent amount of money and support our family, and DH makes very little. I get resentful because I always thought that either he would make enough so that I could go PT, or we would have enough money to really live well. Instead, I work FT, but his hours are worse than mine, so I also do the majority of the child-related things, and we don't get to go on vacation often because I need to work so much. Its very stressful being basically the sold source of income, not something I ever thought I would do.

OP here. That's my worst fear; being depended on for our whole family's lifestyle. I strongly expect my man to provide for me and take care of me financially, so it's a little strange getting used to the idea that I'll have to be the primary breadwinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I make a decent amount of money and support our family, and DH makes very little. I get resentful because I always thought that either he would make enough so that I could go PT, or we would have enough money to really live well. Instead, I work FT, but his hours are worse than mine, so I also do the majority of the child-related things, and we don't get to go on vacation often because I need to work so much. Its very stressful being basically the sold source of income, not something I ever thought I would do.

You get a glimpse of what most men feel, especially those with the stay-at-home wives who promised to go back to work and then reneged.