Needing guy friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Learn how to make friends with women. Why do you prefer male friends?

Don't listen to this. You are allowed to prefer male friends. I do. I was a little sister in a frat rather than join a sorority.

Reading this site has confirmed my preference for male friends. What a bunch of not nice people. Makes for good reading though!

I think its weird when women say they can't make women friends. The only piece of dating advice I have ever given a man is don't date a woman who can't make good/real women friends and claims to like men as friends better. Its usually those women that bring all the dram and jealousy. There is a reason women don't want to hang with her! Yuck on little sisters. Much better to be part of a woman first organization than a hanger on in the boys club. I highly value and respect my women friends. But I try to show that to them.

[Anonymous]

Astonishes me how many seemingly incompetent people there are in this world...I mean people so dumbfounded and disillusioned they don't even know how to make friends - what the hell?!! My preschooler knows how to make friends its not rocket science for crying out loud.
Geez

[Anonymous]

I'll be your doug

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys don't have female friends.

+1

-1 Sorry.

I'm a married guy, happily married for 12 years, with quite a number of female friends. And my wife has a number of male friends. However, the way to ensure that this doesn't cross the line is to ensure that you don't do anything with your friend that you wouldn't be happy to tell your spouse about and to be completely open. Your spouse should feel comfortable reading your e-mail, text or IM messages with the friend over your shoulder, not that he needs to do this, but that he should be able to do this at any time without it being a problem. Your spouse should feel comfortable coming along anytime you are meeting this person, again, not that he needs to attend, but that he should be comfortable spending time with you and the friend and that he is welcome anytime. It also helps if you and the male friend(s) share some activity/past-time that you both enjoy that is not a solitary activity, e.g. running partners where you are often out together alone places, can make a partner suspicious or uncomfortable and even if nothing is going on, it just makes the relationship more tense.

So, look for activities that you enjoy, especially group activities and then join a group and see if you can make friends with someone who also enjoys that activity. Pre-kids, my wife and I were active in community theater and we met different people while doing or attending shows. We often saw those people outside of rehearsals, productions, etc and had a lot of friends of both sexes, some married, some not. We would sometimes see them together, sometimes separate. Even though we've dropped out of theater for a few years, we're still friends with many of the theater friends and we still sometimes see these friends to catch up. And it's open and above-board, we both know when we're meeting someone and neither of us feels threatened. I sometimes joke about the guy who played her husband on stage a long time ago being her ex- and she still sees him sometimes. He's single and I'm not really worried about her having an affair with him (they would not be good partners in any way), but he's a good friend.

[Anonymous]

Obviously OP is scouting for a new husband for after she dumps her early 20's beau who isn't much of a beau anymore.

Always an ulterior motive when it comes to women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Astonishes me how many seemingly incompetent people there are in this world...I mean people so dumbfounded and disillusioned they don't even know how to make friends - what the hell?!! My preschooler knows how to make friends its not rocket science for crying out loud.
Geez

OP here. You sound so nice and understanding I imaging you must have many close and loving friends. Good for you!!

[Anonymous]

OP here. I do love my husband. No I am not shopping for a new one.

I agree with the PP that said there is less drama and it is nice to have a guys point of view on things. I like the idea of joining a sport to meet new people. I would like more couples as friends, but my husband is more of a social hermit. He and I are working on that.

[Anonymous]

Sorry but if a man could "only be friends with women", his wife would not be cool with that shit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I do love my husband. No I am not shopping for a new one.

I agree with the PP that said there is less drama and it is nice to have a guys point of view on things. I like the idea of joining a sport to meet new people. I would like more couples as friends, but my husband is more of a social hermit. He and I are working on that.

This is what you need to focus on...more couple friends.

Because DH is not going to be cool with you picking up new guy friends at this point. If you came in to the relationship with some guy friends, that is cool. Or if during your marriage you would become friends with more guys, your husband knew them/socialized with them, then fine.

But waking up one day saying "I need more guy friends"....that won't float.

[Anonymous]

Chat with the guys in your neighborhood and make friends.

[Anonymous]

Because DH is not going to be cool with you picking up new guy friends at this point. If you came in to the relationship with some guy friends, that is cool. Or if during your marriage you would become friends with more guys, your husband knew them/socialized with them, then fine.

Says you. Some guys, like me, don't really get insecure about wives having men as friends. I am not naive, yes men are trying to screw my wife, but I am not going to forbid her from having male friends because the possibility she may cheat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Learn how to make friends with women. Why do you prefer male friends?

Don't listen to this. You are allowed to prefer male friends. I do. I was a little sister in a frat rather than join a sorority.

Reading this site has confirmed my preference for male friends. What a bunch of not nice people. Makes for good reading though!

I think its weird when women say they can't make women friends. The only piece of dating advice I have ever given a man is don't date a woman who can't make good/real women friends and claims to like men as friends better. Its usually those women that bring all the dram and jealousy. There is a reason women don't want to hang with her! Yuck on little sisters. Much better to be part of a woman first organization than a hanger on in the boys club. I highly value and respect my women friends. But I try to show that to them.

Wow. You just summed up the attitude I'm talking about. Judgemental much?

I'm PP. My roommate from college..who is female amd still my friend20 odd years later..used to come home in tears after sorority meetings because of the bitch factor. They were mean girls to a T.

I would play beer pong and watch football with the guys. She speaks to almost none of her "sisters." While DH and I just had two of my brothers over with their wives the other day and had a lovely meal. Another one of my brothers is godfather to my DS.

I have female friends...but I'm super selective. No mean girl BS will be tolerated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You just summed up the attitude I'm talking about. Judgemental much?

I'm PP. My roommate from college..who is female amd still my friend20 odd years later..used to come home in tears after sorority meetings because of the bitch factor. They were mean girls to a T.

I would play beer pong and watch football with the guys. She speaks to almost none of her "sisters." While DH and I just had two of my brothers over with their wives the other day and had a lovely meal. Another one of my brothers is godfather to my DS.

I have female friends...but I'm super selective. No mean girl BS will be tolerated.

Perfectly said!

[Anonymous]

I highly doubt any of you DWs would be cool with your DH having a lot of friends that were girls because "guys just can't get a long sometimes".

Bullshit all you want, you know it would eat you up inside and you'd know what that chick was trying to do.

[Anonymous]

Call it intuition but I got a feeling OP is somewhere between average and ugly so seriously doubt there'd be any worries from her husband about somebody stealing her away.