Would this bother you re: husband and holiday shopping

[Anonymous]

DH here.

Seriously, we don't give a shit. We hate Christmas. We hate the whole exercise of shopping for gifts. We hate that it's a litmus test for our affection for you. We hate spending the money. We think the whole thing is silly.

We really don't want anything, either. Honestly, half the time we invent stuff to put on our "list" so you'll shut up and leave us alone.

[Anonymous]

Op you are being ridiculous. Just completely crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear OP,

Men don't give a shit.

Sincerely,

DH

Neither do some women. Actually, my husband is a really considerate gift giver. I suck at it. Gift certificates all the way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here.

Seriously, we don't give a shit. We hate Christmas. We hate the whole exercise of shopping for gifts. We hate that it's a litmus test for our affection for you. We hate spending the money. We think the whole thing is silly.

We really don't want anything, either. Honestly, half the time we invent stuff to put on our "list" so you'll shut up and leave us alone.

Angry poster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one is perfect, this is just his flaw and it is minor. Better to have a great husband and dad to your kids than someone who is only good at picking out presents.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear OP,

Men don't give a shit.

Sincerely,

DH

+100 Another DW here. Guys do not think like women. They do not care about the holidays. There is no male equivalent to Martha Stewart. None. He buys you a gift what do you care when he does it.

[Anonymous]

So the takeaway is that DH get no presents ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So the takeaway is that DH get no presents ever.

Another shitty tit for tat poster.

[Anonymous]

Early in our relationship, my DH wasn't good about gifts. But, I didn't really mind because he was so great in other ways and (as a DH noted above), this wasn't a litmus test for his love for me. I know he loves me. Over the years, he's really surprised me with some thoughtful ones but after 15 years of marriage and 3 kids, we usually don't buy each other gifts any more. Most of our resources are focused on the kids and helping the kids do the birthday/Christmas/Mothers Day/Fathers Day thing. We're exhausted. But, I supposed this would only work where the couple have reach a level of mutual respect and understanding.

BTW- the first year we lived together, I bought presents for DH's family. The second year, I did not. I told then BF that if he wanted to give gifts, he needed to pick/buy them. Otherwise, we could make a donation to charity in the name of his family members. He told them this was what we were doing ahead of time and they should do the same for us. It's been great! This will be the first year we've send Christmas cards in 5 years. Didn't have the energy the previous years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My father only shopped for my mother on Christmas Eve. He always bought something nice.

Haha, same. He still does it after nearly 30 years of marriage and we still get on his case for it.

OP, do you ultimately like and appreciate what he gets you? If so, I'd let it go. If not, an online wish list with exact sizes/colors/styles is a good way to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here.

Seriously, we don't give a shit. We hate Christmas. We hate the whole exercise of shopping for gifts. We hate that it's a litmus test for our affection for you. We hate spending the money. We think the whole thing is silly.

We really don't want anything, either. Honestly, half the time we invent stuff to put on our "list" so you'll shut up and leave us alone.

My DH loves Christmas. He buys thoughtful gifts and is a part of the family purchases. Not all men think like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here.

Seriously, we don't give a shit. We hate Christmas. We hate the whole exercise of shopping for gifts. We hate that it's a litmus test for our affection for you. We hate spending the money. We think the whole thing is silly.

We really don't want anything, either. Honestly, half the time we invent stuff to put on our "list" so you'll shut up and leave us alone.

My DH loves Christmas. He buys thoughtful gifts and is a part of the family purchases. Not all men think like this.

sorry you married a gay.

[Anonymous]

Woman here. My husband and I don't exchange gifts on Christmas (or for any other holiday).

My husband does so many things all year long. He gets up early, makes me coffee, scrapes ice off of my windshield, takes the trash/recycling out, walks the dogs -- even when it's rainy and cold. He remembers things I like from the grocery store.

He does all kinds of things that make my day-to-day life so much easier.

He doesn't have to prove anything by buying me something for a so-called religious holiday that we don't really even celebrate.

As I've gotten older, I've realized how silly all of it is. If we ever have children, I intend to downplay all of this xmas consumer-centric nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This could be my DH as well. My solution? Send him an email with a selection of easily ordered-from-online options and have him pick.

And get over it.

OMG just buy it yourself What is the big deal? You telling him what to buy will make a difference? Grow up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dear OP,

Men don't give a shit.

Sincerely,

DH

+100 Another DW here. Guys do not think like women. They do not care about the holidays. There is no male equivalent to Martha Stewart. None. He buys you a gift what do you care when he does it.

just want to point out that there are women out there, like me, that could care less too. Unless it is for our kids, we stay out of the whole gift giving crap