Revealing pregnancy when you receive an offer

[Anonymous]

I definitely do plan on disclosing this once I get a formal offer (of course, this is an "if").
I do worry about the job market, but I think if I stay at THIS job, where there are anticipated RIFs and continued furloughs, I'll still be worried about stability.

I was under the impression that if the employer has more than 15 people, without a legitimate reason, it would be difficult for them to fire you during your leave. The PDA (pregnancy discrimination act) - they have to provide you the same accomodations and leave as they would someone with a disability, like a heart attack or whatnot.

(God, I can't believe I have to think of my pregnancy as a disability).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I would not agree to a lower salary in exchange for being allowed to take maternity leave. That seems like a very short-sighted decision. Maybe you could bake into your contract that your salary will be X for the first year, including however many months of parental leave, and that your second year, your salary would be X+whatever you would have been making before.

Do not screw yourself in the long term for unpaid leave.

I was considering doing this - a temporarly lower salary (still more than I make now, I'd hope) then a return to a higher one when I come back after leave.

And to be clear, I'm not mainly interested in the job for the money, I'm taking the job because it's a generally better job for what I'm best at, it's a much better commute, and it's not in the government.

but I'll look at it the way you lay it out - it's pretty clear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I definitely do plan on disclosing this once I get a formal offer (of course, this is an "if").
I do worry about the job market, but I think if I stay at THIS job, where there are anticipated RIFs and continued furloughs, I'll still be worried about stability.

I was under the impression that if the employer has more than 15 people, without a legitimate reason, it would be difficult for them to fire you during your leave. The PDA (pregnancy discrimination act) - they have to provide you the same accomodations and leave as they would someone with a disability, like a heart attack or whatnot.

(God, I can't believe I have to think of my pregnancy as a disability).

I am not HR or employment lawyer, but I think you are wrong. If you are not protected under FMLA (which you wouldn't be), they can let you go. Maybe the HR people on this board can weigh in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I would not agree to a lower salary in exchange for being allowed to take maternity leave. That seems like a very short-sighted decision. Maybe you could bake into your contract that your salary will be X for the first year, including however many months of parental leave, and that your second year, your salary would be X+whatever you would have been making before.

Do not screw yourself in the long term for unpaid leave.

I was considering doing this - a temporarly lower salary (still more than I make now, I'd hope) then a return to a higher one when I come back after leave.

And to be clear, I'm not mainly interested in the job for the money, I'm taking the job because it's a generally better job for what I'm best at, it's a much better commute, and it's not in the government.

but I'll look at it the way you lay it out - it's pretty clear.

Several times in salary negotiations, I have put down a raise after 6 or 12 months that amounts to the difference between what a potential employer wanted to pay me and what I wanted them to pay me, contingent on good performance reviews.

I've also had to build in time off for a variety of things at the contract negotiation stage, but never as much as you'd be talking about.

Either way, I would name the salary that you believe you are worth, and not volunteer to take less money. You don't want to send a message that you are less valuable simply because you need to take a few months off.

[Anonymous]

OP here - I completely agree, but I think negotiating job security at THIS point is more valuable than a significantly higher salary....no?

And I think it would be different if I were early or middle pregnancy - but I'm almost 26 weeks. So it's a very odd situation. I'm mostly worried about keeping the job.

This is why I'm torn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I completely agree, but I think negotiating job security at THIS point is more valuable than a significantly higher salary....no?

And I think it would be different if I were early or middle pregnancy - but I'm almost 26 weeks. So it's a very odd situation. I'm mostly worried about keeping the job.

This is why I'm torn.

I would be more concerned with disclosing if you were much earlier on. When I was 26 weeks, there was no mistaking the fact that I was pregnant and not just chubby and tired looking. Anyone who had offered me a job at that point would have done so knowing that I would be taking at least a couple months off. If they make you an offer, assume that you are worth the same as you would be worth not pregnant (because you ARE), and negotiate your time off honestly.

Out of curiosity, how much time are you planning to take off? Is this your first child? What kinds of childcare plans will you have in place upon returning to work?

[Anonymous]

thanks, PP (OP here). At my CURRENT job, I plan on taking off 14 weeks because as a fed, I have all those lovely holidays in the winter (so that makes up a week) and I have a ton of sick/annual leave that I have saved up for this purpose - so it would be one week of fed holidays (lets call that a "free" week) and 13 weeks of combined sick and annual.

With a new job, I would (I think) be OK with 12 weeks, 10 if I had to but that wouldn't be easy. Yes this is my first (and probably only!) child.

I 110% plan on returning to work. We are on a huge number of day care lists, and have been since I was 6 weeks pregnant. If I do not have a slot, I will find or start a nanny share.

I will also be working (at this new job) a short walk from home.

I think I am passing as "chubby", but I'm not actively hiding anything. I'm not wearing pregnancy flattering clothes to these interviews (empire waistes, etc) And as I said, I'm not actively discussing it nor hiding it.

Assuming they can fire me if I start the job after disclosing during negotiations that I'm pregnant, I'd be screwed. But wouldn't it make more sense just to take back their offer?

[Anonymous]

OP, is it possible to just negotiate a start date that occurs after you take your Federal leave? Then you would be employed and paid through your maternity leave (effectively terminal leave using up your Federal leave) and start your new job afterward. You could disclose your pregnancy in negotiating this, or not -- taking leave between jobs is understandable even if you're not pregnant, IMO, but also they may care less if they're not paying your benefits during leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:thanks, PP (OP here). At my CURRENT job, I plan on taking off 14 weeks because as a fed, I have all those lovely holidays in the winter (so that makes up a week) and I have a ton of sick/annual leave that I have saved up for this purpose - so it would be one week of fed holidays (lets call that a "free" week) and 13 weeks of combined sick and annual.

With a new job, I would (I think) be OK with 12 weeks, 10 if I had to but that wouldn't be easy. Yes this is my first (and probably only!) child.

I 110% plan on returning to work. We are on a huge number of day care lists, and have been since I was 6 weeks pregnant. If I do not have a slot, I will find or start a nanny share.

I will also be working (at this new job) a short walk from home.

I think I am passing as "chubby", but I'm not actively hiding anything. I'm not wearing pregnancy flattering clothes to these interviews (empire waistes, etc) And as I said, I'm not actively discussing it nor hiding it.

Assuming they can fire me if I start the job after disclosing during negotiations that I'm pregnant, I'd be screwed. But wouldn't it make more sense just to take back their offer?

Chatty PP here. Honestly, OP, it really depends on what kind of organization it is that you're applying to. Given that what you are asking for sounds pretty standard, I would not worry about it too much. Your qualifications speak for themselves, and approaching salary negotiations with that in mind, stating that you'd like to work out some mutually beneficial arrangement for a delayed start date or maternity leave - these are things that make you a professional grown up.

[Anonymous]

PP - I was thinking of doing this, but I don't think they want to wait until February to have someone start. But it is a good point that they would save money but not bringing me on until my maternity leave is over.

I'll definitely keep that as an option to throw out in the negotiation. That would be the best of both worlds since I have so much leave here, I could leave here earlier, protect my leave, etc. And have a fresh start at a new place. I'm pretty sure they want to bring someone in more quickly, but you do never know!

Also...isn't "terminal leave" in the government up to the supervisor? I thought that I'd get shot down on requesting that here (just based on the environment). I could I suppose not say anything and just request FMLA using leave, etc. But that's a detail to figure out later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would wait until you receive the offer.

Get the offer and then come up with a solution for start date and/or leave. Since you will not have been there for 12 or more months they don't even owe you fmla. Overall, 2-3 months leave is a blip in hiring the right person for a longterm position.

[Anonymous]

don't offer to take a lower salary. no no noooo, don't do that. i would not see this as an Either/Or situation where salary has to offset leave time. just find out their leave policy and negotiate for yourself on those terms. whatever you do, get the arrangement in writing.

i started a new job pregnant and disclosed as soon as i got the offer, which was also as soon as i found out. HR told me their policies over the phone and it all sounded good until it came time for me to take leave and i found out they had misinformed me and the employee manual was unclear. get it all in writing.

[Anonymous]

thanks, PP - I do plan on getting it all in writing!
My follow up interview is today...hopefully this is it!

[Anonymous]

So, there will be more interviews. I feel like with that that the hiring process is sort of drawn out (yet th said they wanted someone to start 'right away'), it might be worth at the next meeting to bring up the pregnancy. Because by the time I'd start, I'd be 7 months pregnant and I'm not sure it's right. If this were it, it would be less difficult for me.

Anyone have a view on this? I can't hide baby for that much longer, it was hard enough today as it is. 2+ more weeks of interviews, I'll be in to the third trimester. If I bring it up and don't get the job, at least I know it wasn't the right place for me, right?

I'm soooo confused!!

[Anonymous]

I interviewed when I was 8 months pregnant and told the guy on the phone when he called to set up an interview. There was no hiding it at that point, but the hiring officer said, nicely, that they wanted the right candidate regardless of the timing. Ended up getting the offer the very day I delivered - had about 10 increasingly urgent emails when I finally checked my inbox a week later.