Am I being a "martyr"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hope this is a fake post. You're no martyr, and I hope you are paying your dd a pretty hefty allowance for being a nanny to 5 kids.

I agree, at her age I had a great summer job nannying for a family with a pool that paid 20$ a day (two kids)

Absolutely -- except I was making $10/hr for 2 kids and that was 1990. Wow, OP. I hope this is a fake post.

[Anonymous]

Um, yeah, sorry but you get a smack down for this one. Why did they all have to come? 2 hours in the waiting room?

[Anonymous]

OP here, I just took them all because she had already dressed them and had them fed. Also, during the doctors appointment she took them to the park downstairs and about a mile away. The kids are 2 mos, 19 mos (one at the appt), 3 yr old twins, and a 6 yr old. And she had a few toys that she packed to bring, I thought they would be okay in the waiting room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your DD isn't being a brat, why the hell did you force your other kids to wait in the Drs office, DD could have easily handled them at home. She's right you made more work for yourself & her and then bitched about it.

+1 to all of this.

[Anonymous]

Nope, not a fake post. DD, has a very active social life so don't feel sorry for her. She is acting like a brat. Seriously parents have no spines anymore?

She babysits outside of the family and makes money. I give her an allowance of $70/wk to help out around the house with the kids, the laundry, cooking, cleaning up etc.

[Anonymous]

Is she a step by chance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I just took them all because she had already dressed them and had them fed. Also, during the doctors appointment she took them to the park downstairs and about a mile away. The kids are 2 mos, 19 mos (one at the appt), 3 yr old twins, and a 6 yr old. And she had a few toys that she packed to bring, I thought they would be okay in the waiting room.

Whoa..... That is MORE than a handful for an adult, let alone a 17 year old in a PUBLIC outdoor setting. Although you pay her $70/week, this sort of aggravation should run you ten times that amount.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope, not a fake post. DD, has a very active social life so don't feel sorry for her. She is acting like a brat. Seriously parents have no spines anymore?

She babysits outside of the family and makes money. I give her an allowance of $70/wk to help out around the house with the kids, the laundry, cooking, cleaning up etc.

No, you are acting like a brat. The fact that you came here to ask the question and have dismissed the 100% consensus opinion that you were in the wrong speaks volumes about you and the way you treat your oldest daughter. You're going to ruin your relationship with her and it will be your own fault.

BTW, this has nothing to do with parents and their spines, but nice attempt at a straw man, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope, not a fake post. DD, has a very active social life so don't feel sorry for her. She is acting like a brat. Seriously parents have no spines anymore?

She babysits outside of the family and makes money. I give her an allowance of $70/wk to help out around the house with the kids, the laundry, cooking, cleaning up etc.

If your assessment is that she is a brat, why are you asking DCUM? Trying to start a "parents have no spines" conversation? You and/or your ilk have done that in plenty of other threads. It's not changing anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is she a step by chance?

My guess too. And I'm betting OP treats her much younger brood as though they can do no wrong even when they behave badly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I just took them all because she had already dressed them and had them fed. Also, during the doctors appointment she took them to the park downstairs and about a mile away. The kids are 2 mos, 19 mos (one at the appt), 3 yr old twins, and a 6 yr old. And she had a few toys that she packed to bring, I thought they would be okay in the waiting room.

There are not reasons why you took them, they are rationalizations for why it was OK to take them.

So answer teh wuestion - why on earth would you unnecessarily take this many extra people (including small children) to an appointment?

And you really called your 17 yo daughter "unsupportive" - the same 17 yo who routinely takes care of multiple young children for you, for the princely sum of $70 per week? Are you effin' kidding me?

I agree with the others - you are the one beign a brat. Although I'd use much stronger language than that.

[Anonymous]

You're mad because DD pointed out the truth: that your stress was entirely self-inflicted.

[Anonymous]

OP, you're awful. Your DD is a saint.

[Anonymous]

No, she's not a step child, why? She loves the kids and they love her! The kids are her half brothers and sisters though as they do not have the same dad and I am a single mom.

I just need support sometimes and I do not appreciate the attitude DD gives me sometimes about her responsibilities in this household.

Case and point, the other day DD wanted to go to the mall with a friend. I told her yes but she had to take the 2 DCs with her (2mos and 19 mos). She pitched a fit yelling at me about how she's "entitled" to free time without the kids. I told her she was being disrespectful and I wouldn't stand for it. She actually said "entitled"! Long story short, she ended up taking the kids with her and having a nice day with them at the mall. Like I have stated before, she is being a self centered brat, but I guess that is to be expected from a teenager.

[Anonymous]

OP, you're wrong in this situation. I don't know that I'd specifically call you a martyr, but you're definitely something that's not good and that has to do with taking advantage of a person and not taking responsibilities for your own actions.

These are not your daughter's children. (Unless they are, in which case that's a whole different thread.) Thus, it is not her job to raise them. It is not her responsibility to dress, feed, herd, or entertain them on any sort of regular basis, despite the $70 a week.