Am I being a "martyr"?

[Anonymous]

I don't think you are a martyr; I think you are a slavemaster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So Trolly Polly, you said that 17 year old dd is on summer break and helping with the kids because your vacation doesn't start until June 14. Who the hell took care of a 2nos old, a 19mos old, and 3yr old twins when 17 yr old was in school? And why wasn't the 6 year old in school?

Try again Troll.

And how about the fact that she had a baby 2 month ago and yet has vacation time at work? That's pretty unusual.

This was actually pretty hilarious to read, thanks for the laugh troll, I mean OP.

[Anonymous]

Why did you have 6 kids???

[Anonymous]

1. my mom is here since the baby was born to watch the kids. She left once DD's school ended on May 24th because she has been here since the birth.

2. Not on welfare or any governmental assistance. I don't understand why a mom must be on welfare if she has more than a set number of kids

3. The older kids have been staying at home with DD once they got out of school/daycare. The twins daycare program ended last week as well and there was no need to sign them up for summer if I only would use 2.5 actual weeks of the summer program. The one in elementary school also ended at the end of last week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So Trolly Polly, you said that 17 year old dd is on summer break and helping with the kids because your vacation doesn't start until June 14. Who the hell took care of a 2nos old, a 19mos old, and 3yr old twins when 17 yr old was in school? And why wasn't the 6 year old in school?

Try again Troll.

And how about the fact that she had a baby 2 month ago and yet has vacation time at work? That's pretty unusual.

This was actually pretty hilarious to read, thanks for the laugh troll, I mean OP.

I have "vacation time" because my workplace closes for the summer (summer means june- the last week of july, except for a few depts stay open, not mine)

[Anonymous]

how on earth are you back at work at 8 weeks post-partum and have been back long enough to be on vacation?

funny! and totally unbelieveable! but glad you entertained us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, she's not a step child, why? She loves the kids and they love her! The kids are her half brothers and sisters though as they do not have the same dad and I am a single mom.

I just need support sometimes and I do not appreciate the attitude DD gives me sometimes about her responsibilities in this household.

Case and point, the other day DD wanted to go to the mall with a friend. I told her yes but she had to take the 2 DCs with her (2mos and 19 mos). She pitched a fit yelling at me about how she's "entitled" to free time without the kids. I told her she was being disrespectful and I wouldn't stand for it. She actually said "entitled"! Long story short, she ended up taking the kids with her and having a nice day with them at the mall. Like I have stated before, she is being a self centered brat, but I guess that is to be expected from a teenager.

She is entitled to free time without two young children, because they are not her children- they are yours. It sounds like you are expecting quite a bit out of her- she is still a kid herself, didn't choose to be the only other "adult" in your household but it seems like that is kind of her role.

By the way, the kind of "nice day" that you have with an infant and a toddler is very different than the kind you have just hanging out with friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, she's not a step child, why? She loves the kids and they love her! The kids are her half brothers and sisters though as they do not have the same dad and I am a single mom.

I just need support sometimes and I do not appreciate the attitude DD gives me sometimes about her responsibilities in this household.

Case and point, the other day DD wanted to go to the mall with a friend. I told her yes but she had to take the 2 DCs with her (2mos and 19 mos). She pitched a fit yelling at me about how she's "entitled" to free time without the kids. I told her she was being disrespectful and I wouldn't stand for it. She actually said "entitled"! Long story short, she ended up taking the kids with her and having a nice day with them at the mall. Like I have stated before, she is being a self centered brat, but I guess that is to be expected from a teenager.

Your daughter may not be "entitled" to free time without the kids, but she sure as heck deserves, and has more than earned, free time without the kids. They are your children, not hers. While I agree that every member of a family needs to pitch in to keep things running smoothly I think you've taken things a bit far. She is 17 and should not be relied upon to be the 2nd parent in the house. I have no doubt she loves her siblings, but I seriously wonder what this is doing to her relationship with you. I hope you're really careful b/c the situation as it's been presented seems like there is a great potential for her to develop some deep resentment towards you for turning her into a co-parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, she's not a step child, why? She loves the kids and they love her! The kids are her half brothers and sisters though as they do not have the same dad and I am a single mom.

I just need support sometimes and I do not appreciate the attitude DD gives me sometimes about her responsibilities in this household.

Case and point, the other day DD wanted to go to the mall with a friend. I told her yes but she had to take the 2 DCs with her (2mos and 19 mos). She pitched a fit yelling at me about how she's "entitled" to free time without the kids. I told her she was being disrespectful and I wouldn't stand for it. She actually said "entitled"! Long story short, she ended up taking the kids with her and having a nice day with them at the mall. Like I have stated before, she is being a self centered brat, but I guess that is to be expected from a teenager.

Your daughter may not be "entitled" to free time without the kids, but she sure as heck deserves, and has more than earned, free time without the kids. They are your children, not hers. While I agree that every member of a family needs to pitch in to keep things running smoothly I think you've taken things a bit far. She is 17 and should not be relied upon to be the 2nd parent in the house. I have no doubt she loves her siblings, but I seriously wonder what this is doing to her relationship with you. I hope you're really careful b/c the situation as it's been presented seems like there is a great potential for her to develop some deep resentment towards you for turning her into a co-parent.

+1- So true.

[Anonymous]

Jeff, is this a troll?

[Anonymous]

OP here. Jeff has already addressed that I'm not trolling. But thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Jeff has already addressed that I'm not trolling. But thanks.

Then you're hopeless - why in earth would anyone send a 2 month old to the mall? Especially with a teen aged babysitter who also has to care for a 19 mon old AND is meeting her own friend? That's dumb. Most actual parents on this board avoid taking young infants out to the mall as much as possible (to milit exposure to germs, to help solidify naps) and most would also agree that it's very hard taking two small children anywhere.

I think you're a troll because you can't possibly have these children and these expectations and be on dcum.

[Anonymous]

I think the general populace of DCUM labels troll on anything that is foreign to them.

[Anonymous]

What are you going to do when she goes to college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What are you going to do when she goes to college?

OP here, we have already made plans on this. When DD leaves next year, my mom will move in with us and take DD's room. The reason she had to leave just recently is because she was sleeping on the fold out couch in living room. Also, it will be easier for my mom because she will be able to sell her house in VA and not have to worry about bills as much.