If you are a gay woman....

[Anonymous]

Why don't you have more going on in your life? I welcome you to come take over some of my problems so that you actually have something to do instead of starting ridiculous threads like this!

Yes! This.

[Anonymous]

Good question OP. Describes MIL. Never understood it. Supposedly she's straight. I don't wonder as much about gay women.

[Anonymous]

cross dressing.

[Anonymous]

I don't get it either. I'd rather get with a man than a woman dressed as a man.

[Anonymous]

Some gay women actually self identify as men (are transgendered) and feel more comfortable in men's clothes, etc. Some gay women identify as women but they just happen to be attracted to other women. There is a broad spectrum of sexuality that we fall on, it's not as black and white as many people believe.

signed a straight female.

[Anonymous]

My cousin is a lesbian, and she dresses pretty normal, but her "girlfriend" is the manliest person I ever saw.

[Anonymous]

Guess what--there is a wide spectrum of dress. I'm a lesbian (not a gay woman) and love to wear dresses, skirts, pants, make-up and high heels. I look like most straight 40 something moms who work outside the home.

There are women who dress in low-cut tight dresses, women who wear potatoes sacks, women who wear tailored pant suits, women who wear leggings with short tops, women who wear way too much make-up.

So what.

[Anonymous]

Taking away the judgement I am really curious too... I honestly don't mean it in a snarky way but outside of those gay women who are transgendered why is there a seemingly common attraction toward dressing like a man?

[Anonymous]

I don't understand why most women dress the way they do. I usually think skirts are unflattering or silly looking. I dislike bright colors and pastels. I don't get high heels or heavy make-up. I'm a straight woman who "dresses like a woman" but finds this question ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Just an observation tangentially appropriate for this thread: We were at DH's annual picnic last month. We gave a ride home to a woman who works in his office. She's doing a major renovation to a historic home and invited us in for a tour. DS was enamored with her extensive woodworking tools and she was very kind in helping him try some! She dressed in a big boxy sweatshirt, cargo shorts and low-top hikers (it was a picnic). She had very short-cropped very curly hair. A few days later, i was talking with DS about "that woman's historic home and extensive tool collection" and he said "what woman????... THAT was a woman!?!?!?!?"

[Anonymous]

I don't cross dress, but I imagine people might think I'm gay by what I often wear.
Comfortable flat shoes, straight-legged jeans, longer-length shorts, very little make-up and jewelry. I have gone through phases where I tried to dress more girly, but all I felt was that I was trying to impress everyone else around me. I remember in 9th grade when all the other girls in my dance class were spending hours on hair and make-up and getting giggly about boys, while I wasn't. I started to think I was gay, just because I wasn't like them. But I'm straight. I'm happily married to a man. We have mostly traditional gender roles in our marriage, and I am in most other ways traditionally feminine. It's just how I dress.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Me, too. Woman I work with who is professional, competent, bright, but she wears men's clothes and has hanky, gray hair. She is doing herself a disservice in her career.

This reflects worse on her profession and her supervisors than on her. Why must someone strive to be conventionally attractive to do well in their career?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have always wondered about this too. I work with a gay women that buys only clothes in the mens dept and I think some people who don't know her assume she is a man when they first see her. I don't really understand the dynamic other than sexuality, gender identity are very fluid and there is a still a lot we don't undnerstand about the origins of either.

Right? There is women's clothing that is considered androgynous or "man-tailored"--but they are actually women's clothing so they fit a woman's body better. If you are so proud of being a woman, why wear clothes made for men? I think that just feeds into the stereotype of "dykes who secretly want to be men".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why don't you have more going on in your life? I welcome you to come take over some of my problems so that you actually have something to do instead of starting ridiculous threads like this!

Listen, gays want to be out now. Being put under a microscope is a part of being out. Get used to it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Taking away the judgement I am really curious too... I honestly don't mean it in a snarky way but outside of those gay women who are transgendered why is there a seemingly common attraction toward dressing like a man?

Because it's MUCH MORE COMFORTABLE!!!! From a straight woman here who dresses this way, hates heels, hates makeup, and who would have short hair but then I'd have to go get it cut more often and who wants to sit around a salon more than they have to? If I could get away with it, I would dress like a guy most of the time.

But I understand that's not for everyone, pp. Fine. I just don't get why OP is having a hard time with this.