St Alban's and NCS

[Anonymous]

Well-adjusted and healthy are not adjectives I would apply to the upper schools. For some kids? Absolutely. For all kids, and do the schools have a focus on this? Absolutely not.

[Anonymous]

We have a HS student at NCS and it is the right school for her. I've read about "toxic" and "mean girls" and "pressure cooker" on DCUM for years and years, but she felt like it was the right place for her, and I trusted that.

She's really happy and has found a nice group of friends who are not private jet to the second home kind of wealthy. She's playing sports and looks to be tracking into the advanced/honors classes. She is quite bright - was insufficiently challenged in middle school - and she is loving the challenge. Not to be overly rosy - of course she has bad days, and the work load is serious, but so far she's able to manage it without huge problems.

Our experience just does not track with all the horror stories I read here, so I thought I would chime in to say that. If you have a smart, driven, self-motivated kid who loves learning, it might be the perfect place for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have girls at NCS and so far it has been great. Not a lot pressure on my opinion, but we are not in US yet. My kids are doing great and love their school and friends. I have heard that the current 5th grade is quite unhappy, but I have no idea why because I don’t have kids in that grade.
No eating disorders or need for psychological help that I know of.

We’ve found the academics solid in most classes, but experiences vary by grade in terms of teachers’ professionalism and classroom environment. I’d recommend speaking with current parents.

[Anonymous]

These schools (and Sidwell and GDS) are good for the right kid. The right kid is very bright, highly motivated, probably more extroverted than quiet, etc.

The issue is that many kids join them as young children and you never know what you're going to get at that age. You don't know if you're going to end up with a "normal smart" kid or a really smart, outlying kid. I know, everyone on DCUM is reading this thinking: "well, MY kid is the second, they read at age 3" but the reality is that few kids are. Few kids can handle advanced work at a fast past and be truly happy and not impacted by any stress. I would say out of an NCS or STA or Sidwell class about 50% of the kids are a "Great fit" for the school. 50% struggle to keep up with their peers but their parents keep them there for whatever reason(s). And it's hard to be happy when you're struggling or always feel behind your peers in a pretty small setting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When people say competitive, you're actually competing on what dimension? Wealth? Unless you actually own a gold mine or an oil rig or employee number ten at Amazon or got lots of Apple stock I don't see how this can work.

Competition occurs in a lot of dimensions. If you can’t imagine it, then you haven’t experienced the Cathedral Close or were oblivious.

There are academic and attendance awards to be won at Prize Day and Flag Day. The awards reflect one’s entire high school career. Some students arrive to day 1 of 9th grade with eyes on a prize, while others develop a desire for recognition along the way.

Students compete to build their resumes for college and to be admitted to tier I institutions, so there’s competition for leadership positions in clubs and sports.

Students compete to do well in classes and to be recognized as bright and accomplished by both peers and teachers.

Some students are socially competitive. There are in groups and out groups. Everyone has friends, but all students have a sense for who has the social influence. Amongst the boys, social competitiveness can manifest in athletic aggressiveness and even “play” physical fighting.

Last, there’s some level of competition for having material possessions. Many kids know they can’t compete on this level, but others come to school with Tiffany baubles or luxury cars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son arrived at in high school. We are not fancy people, country club members or VIPs. We are liberal politically.

We loved STA. Loved the traditions, teachers, the way the school is very organized and how they hold boys to a high standard but with a good deal of grace. Our son made a good number of life long friends. Other parents were very kind to our son and perfectly friendly to us. Our son is very smart but pretty unmotivated and really thrived under the high academic standards. He is a boy who would have done the least amount of work possible in a school where he could skate by (he's a professional at this). He's now at an Ivy and getting straight As and we really attribute this to the work ethic and focus he developed at STA.

I posted earlier about NCS vs MCPS. Yes, a large part of the pro of these top privates is the work ethic. My kids were not immersed in that work ethic at MCPS - quite the opposite, actually. They are not very hard workers. They are learning to work harder, in college. I think if they had been immersed in an environment like NCS or Sidwell (I don't like STA so would not have sent him there), they likely would be more diligent students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son arrived at in high school. We are not fancy people, country club members or VIPs. We are liberal politically.

We loved STA. Loved the traditions, teachers, the way the school is very organized and how they hold boys to a high standard but with a good deal of grace. Our son made a good number of life long friends. Other parents were very kind to our son and perfectly friendly to us. Our son is very smart but pretty unmotivated and really thrived under the high academic standards. He is a boy who would have done the least amount of work possible in a school where he could skate by (he's a professional at this). He's now at an Ivy and getting straight As and we really attribute this to the work ethic and focus he developed at STA.

Except everybody in the Ivies gets straight As

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son arrived at in high school. We are not fancy people, country club members or VIPs. We are liberal politically.

We loved STA. Loved the traditions, teachers, the way the school is very organized and how they hold boys to a high standard but with a good deal of grace. Our son made a good number of life long friends. Other parents were very kind to our son and perfectly friendly to us. Our son is very smart but pretty unmotivated and really thrived under the high academic standards. He is a boy who would have done the least amount of work possible in a school where he could skate by (he's a professional at this). He's now at an Ivy and getting straight As and we really attribute this to the work ethic and focus he developed at STA.

Except everybody in the Ivies gets straight As

Not true at all but whatever.

[Anonymous]

As the parent of a “lifer” on the close who is now an upperclassman (woman?) at NCS, a few things to add on to the previous posts which are all pretty spot on:
-there are cliques at NCS like any high school. my daughter has not encountered outward meanness/bullying but you’re not going to be besties with everyone either (and that’s normal). Most girls seem to find their people, a lot of friendships come from sports.
-not everyone from BVR leaves, there are more than 20 still in my daughter’s grade. BUT I would not completely rule out leaving at some point. Girls do leave for different reasons and I have a lot respect for parents who move their kids bc it’s not a good fit.
-academics do get much tougher in US. your child needs good time management and focus to do well. teachers are solid in US for the most part. Many are truly outstanding.
-cathedral schools aren’t easy and they aren’t a ticket to t10 colleges. your kid has to put in the work.

[Anonymous]

How would a high level competitive athlete do at NCS? Think ECNL soccer, club volleyball, or AAU basketball type.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have girls at NCS and so far it has been great. Not a lot pressure on my opinion, but we are not in US yet. My kids are doing great and love their school and friends. I have heard that the current 5th grade is quite unhappy, but I have no idea why because I don’t have kids in that grade.
No eating disorders or need for psychological help that I know of.

This is rising 6th you are speaking of? Can anyone shed light on the issues?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How would a high level competitive athlete do at NCS? Think ECNL soccer, club volleyball, or AAU basketball type.

There are 3 or 4 ECNL soccer players at the school now. I don't know how it's going for them but they were there this year.
I will say that many of the top academic girls figure out a way to get out of the team sports requirement entirely (through taking yoga or other things) so it's not an entirely level playing field. If you're trying to balance 3 seasons of team sports until 6pm each day it's a much harder experience overall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son arrived at in high school. We are not fancy people, country club members or VIPs. We are liberal politically.

We loved STA. Loved the traditions, teachers, the way the school is very organized and how they hold boys to a high standard but with a good deal of grace. Our son made a good number of life long friends. Other parents were very kind to our son and perfectly friendly to us. Our son is very smart but pretty unmotivated and really thrived under the high academic standards. He is a boy who would have done the least amount of work possible in a school where he could skate by (he's a professional at this). He's now at an Ivy and getting straight As and we really attribute this to the work ethic and focus he developed at STA.

Except everybody in the Ivies gets straight As

Not true at all but whatever.

Very common freshman year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How would a high level competitive athlete do at NCS? Think ECNL soccer, club volleyball, or AAU basketball type.

I’d choose Sidwell over NCS for any of these sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a HS student at NCS and it is the right school for her. I've read about "toxic" and "mean girls" and "pressure cooker" on DCUM for years and years, but she felt like it was the right place for her, and I trusted that.

She's really happy and has found a nice group of friends who are not private jet to the second home kind of wealthy. She's playing sports and looks to be tracking into the advanced/honors classes. She is quite bright - was insufficiently challenged in middle school - and she is loving the challenge. Not to be overly rosy - of course she has bad days, and the work load is serious, but so far she's able to manage it without huge problems.

Our experience just does not track with all the horror stories I read here, so I thought I would chime in to say that. If you have a smart, driven, self-motivated kid who loves learning, it might be the perfect place for her.

My daughter loves NCS. Some of the things offered there she now appreciates even more. The parent community overall is much much nicer than St. Albans in our experience. You won't find parent friends as easily at St. Albans as at NCS and that is the same experience that at least 7 plus other families we know that have had kids at both schools have had as well. St. Albans parents can be brutal.