In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I married when we were in our late 50s. Both of us were divorced with no kids in the home when we met. We have an active sex life (at least 3X/week) and that is with each of us having experienced some big health events already. We both use meds (HRT and Viagra). If cancer, weight gain, menopause, and cardiac problems haven't stopped us by now, no reason to expect that anything else will anytime soon. We each experienced dead bedroom marriages and neither one of us has any intention of returning to that sort of cold and distant marriage ever again. You should read the NYT article that came out this week about the older couple that embrace their sexuality together, even if that means expanding their understanding about what counts as sex. Hint: there's more to sex than PIV!

A new relationship is very different than a 30 year old one.

But since you found this great love and chemistry so late in life it will likely carry you all the way to the end!

Yeah why do people not get this. Like the woman in the other thread who is older and bragging that she and her bf of a year have sex all the time. Uh, yeah, that’s how endorphins work…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you comprehend that you will feel differently at 65, 75, 85 than you did at 20, 30 or 40?

Marriages can last 60 years or more. Do you understand that health issues can crop up along the way?

I wish I had realized better that my drive would bounce back quite a bit post menopause, but hormones are a true driver of sex and once those hormones drop, so does desire. And atrophy is a real issue for many women.

But also many men start to have a lot of issues in their 50s. Weight and medications cause ED difficulty, and knees and hips start to break down.

It's not as easy to "just do it" to appease a partner.

Sex is the icing on the cake in a relationship. It's not the main thing.

--- Signed married woman for 45 years

That's nice for you. Sex is the most important part of a marriage. I despise my wife for taking that away.

You sound really trashy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you comprehend that you will feel differently at 65, 75, 85 than you did at 20, 30 or 40?

Marriages can last 60 years or more. Do you understand that health issues can crop up along the way?

I wish I had realized better that my drive would bounce back quite a bit post menopause, but hormones are a true driver of sex and once those hormones drop, so does desire. And atrophy is a real issue for many women.

But also many men start to have a lot of issues in their 50s. Weight and medications cause ED difficulty, and knees and hips start to break down.

It's not as easy to "just do it" to appease a partner.

Sex is the icing on the cake in a relationship. It's not the main thing.

--- Signed married woman for 45 years

That's nice for you. Sex is the most important part of a marriage. I despise my wife for taking that away.

That’s messed up thinking. You are a pig. No wonder your wife refuses you.

[Anonymous]

65 and 68, everything is still working here.

[Anonymous]

We’re married 30 years, we’re in our early 60s. If we didn’t have sex at our age 3/4 times a month I’d miss it. We have maybe 10 more years? IDK

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s an Italian saying that if you put a marble in a jar every time you have sex in the first year, and then remove a marble every time you have sex after the first year…

You can finish the sentence

Can you explain it to me? I truly don’t understand

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I married when we were in our late 50s. Both of us were divorced with no kids in the home when we met. We have an active sex life (at least 3X/week) and that is with each of us having experienced some big health events already. We both use meds (HRT and Viagra). If cancer, weight gain, menopause, and cardiac problems haven't stopped us by now, no reason to expect that anything else will anytime soon. We each experienced dead bedroom marriages and neither one of us has any intention of returning to that sort of cold and distant marriage ever again. You should read the NYT article that came out this week about the older couple that embrace their sexuality together, even if that means expanding their understanding about what counts as sex. Hint: there's more to sex than PIV!

Link to article?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Men can’t keep it up or sometimes can’t even get it up after 45, so unless you are marrying another woman… it’s limited. But a good man can be creative!

You do realize there are plenty of men in their 60s and 70s that don't need any help getting it up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s an Italian saying that if you put a marble in a jar every time you have sex in the first year, and then remove a marble every time you have sex after the first year…

You can finish the sentence

Can you explain it to me? I truly don’t understand

you still have marbles when you die. point is that you have more sex in your first year of marriage than the rest of the years of your marriage combined

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men can’t keep it up or sometimes can’t even get it up after 45, so unless you are marrying another woman… it’s limited. But a good man can be creative!

You do realize there are plenty of men in their 60s and 70s that don't need any help getting it up.

Hmmmm... not so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s an Italian saying that if you put a marble in a jar every time you have sex in the first year, and then remove a marble every time you have sex after the first year…

You can finish the sentence

Can you explain it to me? I truly don’t understand

you still have marbles when you die. point is that you have more sex in your first year of marriage than the rest of the years of your marriage combined

Yes, this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s an Italian saying that if you put a marble in a jar every time you have sex in the first year, and then remove a marble every time you have sex after the first year…

You can finish the sentence

Can you explain it to me? I truly don’t understand

you still have marbles when you die. point is that you have more sex in your first year of marriage than the rest of the years of your marriage combined

And that's ridiculous. We are having maybe a third as much now (year 20) as we were in our first year. So the last three years would have emptied the jar even without the 16 years in between.

[Anonymous]

At 52 I feel don't touch me, don't even talk to me, or we can get divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you comprehend that you will feel differently at 65, 75, 85 than you did at 20, 30 or 40?

Marriages can last 60 years or more. Do you understand that health issues can crop up along the way?

I wish I had realized better that my drive would bounce back quite a bit post menopause, but hormones are a true driver of sex and once those hormones drop, so does desire. And atrophy is a real issue for many women.

But also many men start to have a lot of issues in their 50s. Weight and medications cause ED difficulty, and knees and hips start to break down.

It's not as easy to "just do it" to appease a partner.

Sex is the icing on the cake in a relationship. It's not the main thing.

--- Signed married woman for 45 years

That's nice for you. Sex is the most important part of a marriage. I despise my wife for taking that away.

You sound really trashy

I'm in a happy marriage, where this is is not an issue, but I feel for this poster. If my DW refused to have sex, that would present a serious problem.

[Anonymous]

Married many decades, slowed down when the kids were little, picked up as empty nesters. Now, with ED and menopause, it's literally not as fun, and I am significantly less interested. Always thought I'd be having sex until my grave, but don't feel that way anymore