So depressing - mid-life and death

[Anonymous]

OP you’re right which is why I’m taking the trips, buying the shoes, indulging myself when I want. Life is short and with the world being quite unpleasant these days, I’m doing what I can to keep happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the same age, OP, and I’m basically ready to die right now. Trump has ruined everything, and I just don’t want to be here anymore. I feel sad that I might not see any grandchildren, but at this point I’m so sad about our situation and do angry at Trump that I just would prefer to die.

You are mentally ill. Please seek help.

[Anonymous]

I am fifty-seven ➕ I could have written your post OP.

It wasn’t until last year or so that I realized that I was truly at the stage in my life that I needed to accept that I won’t be around forever.

** To clarify: I KNOW inherently that I won’t live forever but when you are younger, it is a given that you feel invincible.
But as time passes & life progresses organically I see things more pragmatically than I did even ten years ago.

It isn’t all negative however.
Because at my advanced age, I also have a better perspective on life overall and can easily recognize the blessings that I possess.
I.e., great health, ability to live independently, etc. 👍🏽

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the same age, OP, and I’m basically ready to die right now. Trump has ruined everything, and I just don’t want to be here anymore. I feel sad that I might not see any grandchildren, but at this point I’m so sad about our situation and do angry at Trump that I just would prefer to die.

You are mentally ill. Please seek help.

Aww…..
I am so sorry that you feel this way PP.

Yes Trump has and is hurting a lot of innocent + vulnerable people.

But do not let him destroy you.
Please talk to someone - even a professional.

Hugs 🤗

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Geez, you all need to crack open a bottle of wine and relax. Nothing you can do about your age - just try to enjoy your life and loved ones while you are here. That's all any of us can do.

Look at all the celebrities who did not get the opportunity to reach 55.
I.e., Lisa Marie Presley, Shannen Doherty, Eric Dane, James Van Der Beek, etc.

Think of the alternative.
At least you (and me too!) get to be around for our kids and loved ones.
Because not everyone does……

[Anonymous]

OP. Learn from the wisdom of author Mark Twain - “ Do not complain about growing old. It is a privilege denied to many.”

Make the best use of your remaining days.

[Anonymous]

My parents passed when I was in my early 50s and while it was sad I came to terms with it. But then my best friend who I had know since I was 13 died from an illness we didn’t know about. It really hit me and made me feel like I was heading into that more fragile phase of life where things really do happen. And since then 2 more friends have died. Now at 60 I do wonder sometimes what will take me out…

[Anonymous]

You have far less tomorrows than yesterdays OP.

[Anonymous]

Life is fleeting.

I work in healthcare and it was striking when I turned 50 and I realized that many of my sick patients are my age.

It was easy taking care of them when I was 30. Now it's like, "oh sh$%T, this hits too close to home."

[Anonymous]

I feel you, OP--I'm right there with you.

We try to do all the right things--do well in school, go to college, get a decent job, get married, get a house, have kids, and raise them to be good human beings.

But while we're busy making a life for ourselves and helping our kids, our moms' and dads' lives were quietly slipping away.

Well, those moms and dads we left at the house back then is where we find ourselves today. The kids are moving on. Our careers are winding down. The state of our parents--if they're even still around--is depressing. And, for us? We get to hear about yet another health concern from our doctor at every annual check up.

I'll offer this, OP. I'm a 57yo Black man. It's no secret that Black males in the U.S. have the lowest life expectancy of any major demographic group. I can't ignore that. But in the last few years, I kind of feel like I've figured out how to "slow life down" for me.

I pause-out of the blue--a lot. I just stop and really take in the moment. Doesn't even have to be anything special going on. I look at faces. I listen to voices.

When I eat, I try to really think about the taste of the food. Where it came from. I think about the plant or the animal. And I'm thankful for it.

I take more pictures of ordinary moments. It might be of me and the family eating sandwiches. The dogs sleeping together. DW reading. Or, the sky.

I say I love you. Often. And I try to get in more hugs.

I know. None of this is particularly genius. But these things have helped me be more present and to try to live with deeper intention. To take it all in--with an appreciation that I am here to witness it all. Helen Keller wrote a profound essay in 1933, "Three Days to See". I read it every couple of years to remind myself that while my time is indeed limited, I'm gonna try to "suck the marrow out of life" while I'm here.

Good luck, OP. You are not alone.

[Anonymous]

I hear ya, OP.

I’m early 50s, my mom got cancer in her late 60s and suffered and died within a handful of years, so I’m under no illusion that I’m guaranteed anything. I’m caring for my elderly father and in-laws along with an older sibling with a history of medical issues.

It stinks to think that I’m struggling to sock away money for my kids and could get sick anytime.

I’m with you: I wish I could retire now and just live a very simple life on a beach.

[Anonymous]

YOLO

Try to prioritize and spend your time doing things that make you happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel you, OP--I'm right there with you.

We try to do all the right things--do well in school, go to college, get a decent job, get married, get a house, have kids, and raise them to be good human beings.

But while we're busy making a life for ourselves and helping our kids, our moms' and dads' lives were quietly slipping away.

Well, those moms and dads we left at the house back then is where we find ourselves today. The kids are moving on. Our careers are winding down. The state of our parents--if they're even still around--is depressing. And, for us? We get to hear about yet another health concern from our doctor at every annual check up.

I'll offer this, OP. I'm a 57yo Black man. It's no secret that Black males in the U.S. have the lowest life expectancy of any major demographic group. I can't ignore that. But in the last few years, I kind of feel like I've figured out how to "slow life down" for me.

I pause-out of the blue--a lot. I just stop and really take in the moment. Doesn't even have to be anything special going on. I look at faces. I listen to voices.

When I eat, I try to really think about the taste of the food. Where it came from. I think about the plant or the animal. And I'm thankful for it.

I take more pictures of ordinary moments. It might be of me and the family eating sandwiches. The dogs sleeping together. DW reading. Or, the sky.

I say I love you. Often. And I try to get in more hugs.

I know. None of this is particularly genius. But these things have helped me be more present and to try to live with deeper intention. To take it all in--with an appreciation that I am here to witness it all. Helen Keller wrote a profound essay in 1933, "Three Days to See". I read it every couple of years to remind myself that while my time is indeed limited, I'm gonna try to "suck the marrow out of life" while I'm here.

Good luck, OP. You are not alone.

This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel you, OP--I'm right there with you.

We try to do all the right things--do well in school, go to college, get a decent job, get married, get a house, have kids, and raise them to be good human beings.

But while we're busy making a life for ourselves and helping our kids, our moms' and dads' lives were quietly slipping away.

Well, those moms and dads we left at the house back then is where we find ourselves today. The kids are moving on. Our careers are winding down. The state of our parents--if they're even still around--is depressing. And, for us? We get to hear about yet another health concern from our doctor at every annual check up.

I'll offer this, OP. I'm a 57yo Black man. It's no secret that Black males in the U.S. have the lowest life expectancy of any major demographic group. I can't ignore that. But in the last few years, I kind of feel like I've figured out how to "slow life down" for me.

I pause-out of the blue--a lot. I just stop and really take in the moment. Doesn't even have to be anything special going on. I look at faces. I listen to voices.

When I eat, I try to really think about the taste of the food. Where it came from. I think about the plant or the animal. And I'm thankful for it.

I take more pictures of ordinary moments. It might be of me and the family eating sandwiches. The dogs sleeping together. DW reading. Or, the sky.

I say I love you. Often. And I try to get in more hugs.

I know. None of this is particularly genius. But these things have helped me be more present and to try to live with deeper intention. To take it all in--with an appreciation that I am here to witness it all. Helen Keller wrote a profound essay in 1933, "Three Days to See". I read it every couple of years to remind myself that while my time is indeed limited, I'm gonna try to "suck the marrow out of life" while I'm here.

Good luck, OP. You are not alone.

Absolutely love this approach. It’s mindfulness. I try to do this daily as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel you, OP--I'm right there with you.

We try to do all the right things--do well in school, go to college, get a decent job, get married, get a house, have kids, and raise them to be good human beings.

But while we're busy making a life for ourselves and helping our kids, our moms' and dads' lives were quietly slipping away.

Well, those moms and dads we left at the house back then is where we find ourselves today. The kids are moving on. Our careers are winding down. The state of our parents--if they're even still around--is depressing. And, for us? We get to hear about yet another health concern from our doctor at every annual check up.

I'll offer this, OP. I'm a 57yo Black man. It's no secret that Black males in the U.S. have the lowest life expectancy of any major demographic group. I can't ignore that. But in the last few years, I kind of feel like I've figured out how to "slow life down" for me.

I pause-out of the blue--a lot. I just stop and really take in the moment. Doesn't even have to be anything special going on. I look at faces. I listen to voices.

When I eat, I try to really think about the taste of the food. Where it came from. I think about the plant or the animal. And I'm thankful for it.

I take more pictures of ordinary moments. It might be of me and the family eating sandwiches. The dogs sleeping together. DW reading. Or, the sky.

I say I love you. Often. And I try to get in more hugs.

I know. None of this is particularly genius. But these things have helped me be more present and to try to live with deeper intention. To take it all in--with an appreciation that I am here to witness it all. Helen Keller wrote a profound essay in 1933, "Three Days to See". I read it every couple of years to remind myself that while my time is indeed limited, I'm gonna try to "suck the marrow out of life" while I'm here.

Good luck, OP. You are not alone.

Age 59, this is just lovely. Thank you for posting.