Why do people get so much angrier at women having babies over 45 than men?

[Anonymous]

I’ve always judged both men and women equally for this.

[Anonymous]

This is simply yet another, glaring, daily indicator of the dominance of Western capitalist cisheteropatriarchy.

[Anonymous]

If you look around, people are much angrier about EVERYTHING they disagree with.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think people get angry about this as much as you think they do.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think you have framed this thread correctly, OP.

Nobody gets “angry” at women who have babies north of 40.

Rather, some people wonder about celebrities who use surrogates or pretend like they are naturally pregnant without significant interventions—including donor eggs—when they are pregnant in their mid to late 40s.

Anyone can google the statistics and see that it’s a miracle for most women to magically become pregnant and carry to term when they are in their mid 40s. So, we wonder.

But nobody is angry.

I wish women would be more open and honest about it. But at the end of the day, I don’t really care what people do.

Re: the health issues - the statistics are all there. There are significant increased risks with AMA.

Signed,

Mother of 4 who conceived naturally at 38 and delivered at 39 (and subsequently got pregnant a handful of times but MC each time)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Literally every woman we know who had a child around or after 40 has a child with health complications - from allergies to extreme disabilities.

Health issues with the child are nowhere close to the same with the fathers over 40.

How odd. That's the exact opposite of my experience.

+1
Me too

Me too. All the 40-ish year old moms I know are fine. I will say I know a lot who had babies in the 38-42 year age range. I don’t know anyone who was 45.

[Anonymous]

If a woman has too many kids people get angry.

If a woman has one kid people get angry.

If a woman has kids when she's too young people get angry.

If a woman has kids when she's too old people get angry.

If a woman has no kids people get angry.

If a woman stays home with her kids people get angry.

If a woman goes back to work after having kids people get angry.

Tune it out (which incidentally, also makes people angry).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve always judged both men and women equally for this.

+1

[Anonymous]

45 is too old for ANYONE to have a baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If a woman has too many kids people get angry.

If a woman has one kid people get angry.

If a woman has kids when she's too young people get angry.

If a woman has kids when she's too old people get angry.

If a woman has no kids people get angry.

If a woman stays home with her kids people get angry.

If a woman goes back to work after having kids people get angry.

Tune it out (which incidentally, also makes people angry).

I am angry that you have pointed this out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve always judged both men and women equally for this.

Same here.

[Anonymous]

My senator is in his 70s and I think it's so tacky that he posts about his 2 year old when discussing reproductive care. It's like dude, that's not why people want fertility treatments covered by insurance.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t say I get angry at a woman for having a baby around the age of 45, but I do think they are being sort of reckless with their lives, the life of the baby, and the lives of any other children they have?

Isn’t it common knowledge that the ALL of the risks of childbirth go way up after 40 and continue to rise with the age of the age of the mother? I was an AMA mom myself, and one of the reasons I stopped at one child was I knew the odds of a healthy pregnancy and baby weren’t as good as they were a couple years earlier when I was 39.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve always judged both men and women equally for this.

+1

Agreed!

Every older parent I know acts like they invented parenting. Like, it couldn't possibly have been happening before they decided it was worthy of their attention, well into their fourth or fifth decade.
And to a person, they are all convinced that they are doing it WAY better than anyone else.

Egotists and narcissists to a person. Including the fact that they are all
Convinced that no sickness, cancer, early dementia, or any other common health risk could ever, ever, and will never happen to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get it.

No one bats an eye if a man is 48 but if a woman is then it’s somehow unacceptable

Start by understanding how biology works.

-Woman