I feel like I’m drowning—advice?
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Anonymous
| Read a little Budhist thought on the topic. |
Anonymous
|
I know you do not want to burden your friends, but sometimes venting to friends can make you feel better. I think the key is to limit how much you vent. I do not mind listening to others and providing support, as long as it’s not 100 percent one-sided.
When my son was a teen, I started taking mini-vacations by myself. It is glorious not to have to worry about anyone else for a day or two. It was amazing for my mental health. |
Anonymous
| I starting getting an hour massage once a week. Phone is off and just blissful quiet hands on me making me feel wonderful. Better than talking to anyone. |
Anonymous
| I could have written this, op. I'm fact there's a couple moms I've talked to about this stuff who might see it and think I wrote it. But probably there are more of us in this boat than we realize. |
Anonymous
| Too many words. Maybe you should take a week or two off and go travel to Italy? That always cheers me up. |
Anonymous
| Take a walk, a bath and get a good night of sleep. Tomorrow find three things on your list that you can delegate. Then pick the most important thing remaining g on your list to focus on and work on that matter. You’ll feel better even if all your troubles aren’t resolved. Good luck! |
Anonymous
Disagree - you need to make teenager and yourself a priority. Help husband with his personal issues but reach out to his family to ask for help with his parents. Focus on teen yes they need to be a priority. Write daily lists of what is most important that day like must do things ie: doctor appointment etc... something for your teen, caring for husband but alot time for each thing. You cant do it all so pick top priorities and ask for help. Yes those people that offer and you said no in the past - now is the time to ask for help. People want to help people if they can. Good luck. |
Anonymous
| What's the timeframe for your husband (who's "trying") to rejoin his marriage and role as parent, husband, and son? Nice of you to carry his burdens for a while but this can't be forever. |
Anonymous
NP. I also could have written this + dealing with cancer. |
Anonymous
| Meditation is what saves me. When I feel like you do, meditation helps me see that I’m locked into a particular perspective, and that’s what’s making me feel overwhelmed. I’m able to change my perspective and just be in the moment more. |
Anonymous
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So sorry OP. This sounds exhausting
Similar experiences especially a few years ago. For me there was no one magic bullet but they all helped together - yoga - daily walks however short - therapist (both individual and family) - medicine to help sleep - good friends who had survived rough times with teens/ young adult children showing they care and understand - faith community sending flowers and offering meals (I did not accept meals often but it meant so much that they offered) For me community is as important as individual self care. Sending you well wishes for finding the combo that works for you. |
Anonymous
| Most things are not actual emergencies. Break down the "chores" that you are performing for older adults, DH and teenager and ask them to do the pieces that they can do themselves. Only step in when actually necessary. |
Anonymous
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Let things slide.
Make a list of all the things that are on your shoulders, select those that only you truly can do and prioritize those. Strike out those that can slide (no one dies, no one is fired, no one fails their school year), and involve someone else for others. It’s hard. But you can’t keep trying to do everything. |
Anonymous
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Let things slide.
Go on meds. They are a quick fix, and lighten the load. Therapy can be nice, but can also be unproductive and $ |
Anonymous
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I say this with all kindness op, but what you describe sounds like the typical state of most adults I know. Work, spouse, aging parents and kids. And it sounds like you have one kid, and a teen. Not an easy age, but you’re not changing diapers or up all night.
Please get some perspective. |