I have never felt further behind

[Anonymous]

If you have a roof over your head, food to eat, and good health, you win!

[Anonymous]

Most people don't have fortunes. I earn five figures, will probably never be able to afford to buy, can't go back to school for more degrees, have no idea at all how to invest (and don't have much money anyway so ...), don't get family money, have never left North America, can't afford vacations, and just ... exist.

Maybe hang out with more working class people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most people don't have fortunes. I earn five figures, will probably never be able to afford to buy, can't go back to school for more degrees, have no idea at all how to invest (and don't have much money anyway so ...), don't get family money, have never left North America, can't afford vacations, and just ... exist.

Maybe hang out with more working class people?

You are the typical American...the people asking if $400k for DD in 529 for 4 years at top college is enough are on a planet of their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most people don't have fortunes. I earn five figures, will probably never be able to afford to buy, can't go back to school for more degrees, have no idea at all how to invest (and don't have much money anyway so ...), don't get family money, have never left North America, can't afford vacations, and just ... exist.

Maybe hang out with more working class people?

Thank you for this reality check. I’m going to stop feeling sorry for myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP. The thing is that by staying in the same place I’m downwardly mobile. I can’t afford the things I used to be able to.

Same with all of us.

[Anonymous]

What went wrong with investing? $500 a month into an index funds for 20-25 years would have got you where you want to be.
I did it on minimum wage and retired at 46. The money is growing faster than I can spend.
I learned to manage my own money in Roth. My returns are easily double the market returns.
I didn't even start investing until I was 30, because of my visa. I bought a small condo at 30 and then at 40, I started investing. Still caught up with everyone as markets have been great.
Investing is something you do monthly. You learn and you get better at it. Don't leave it to some company to do it for you.
I always wondered how people with permits to invest and decent pay couldn't get it done. They just didn't work on it. It doesn't come on it's own. It definitely doesn't come with 401k.
The only way to know that 401k is no good, is to do it better and compare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most people don't have fortunes. I earn five figures, will probably never be able to afford to buy, can't go back to school for more degrees, have no idea at all how to invest (and don't have much money anyway so ...), don't get family money, have never left North America, can't afford vacations, and just ... exist.

Maybe hang out with more working class people?

Learning to invest is for everyone. There is so much information in books and online. It's a choice not to do it. Just like I never learned to cook.

[Anonymous]

You get into your 50s and people start dropping like flies. Or losing jobs or career when they face age discrimination. Health problems sneak up. If you are healthy and employed you have a good situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are a women your husband is a failure not you

No, they both are. She chose him and she chose her job.

[Anonymous]

I don't know if you live in the DMV, but assuming you do: Can you move? We left DC years ago for a lower cost of living area. Life is cheaper, and easier. Plus our friends tend to be normal middle/working class, not super rich here, so there's no "keeping up with the Joneses" vibe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every time I think I’m catching up I find my frame of reference is badly outdated and I am falling further and further behind. At this point most of the people I started life with have made fortunes and married well and I have done neither. The discrepancies really compound over time. I’m the poor relation now with respect to my friends and family. I feel like everyone else has the playbook but me.

I studied hard did well in school went to grad school got a steady job make a decent income but didn’t do well investing, wasn’t able to buy a house at the right time, didn’t marry the right person and am now middle class. It seems like life keeps adding a zero onto the end of however much things cost.

Ok OP. I get it. Some people got lucky, some people made their luck. That wasn’t you. Now what are you going to do about? At this stage of life you need to stop comparing yourself to others or feeling resentful things didn’t turn out differently because it is a waste of precious time and will stop you from changing what is under your control. What are your financial goals? Write them all down and then focus on the top three that are attainable and get going. If you are in your 50s you still have time to work and save assuming you are in good health. You can still improve your situation. Imagine where you want to be when you are 65. And work as hard as you can and save to get there. If you don’t know how start educating yourself online there are so many resources now. Start with the Bogleheads forum and principles. There is no fast fix for you when it comes to investing and plenty of potential downside so don’t chase any fast or unrealistic returns . Slow and steady is the best you can do right now. But your expenses and focus ok socking away every penny you can. Or, alternatively, you do nothing for the next decade but moan about what you didn’t achieve and you will be no better off in 10 years. Choice is up to you. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Your choices resulted in your outcome. Start making different choices if you want a different outcome, but be mindful of risk at each turn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What went wrong with investing? $500 a month into an index funds for 20-25 years would have got you where you want to be.
I did it on minimum wage and retired at 46. The money is growing faster than I can spend.
I learned to manage my own money in Roth. My returns are easily double the market returns.
I didn't even start investing until I was 30, because of my visa. I bought a small condo at 30 and then at 40, I started investing. Still caught up with everyone as markets have been great.
Investing is something you do monthly. You learn and you get better at it. Don't leave it to some company to do it for you.
I always wondered how people with permits to invest and decent pay couldn't get it done. They just didn't work on it. It doesn't come on it's own. It definitely doesn't come with 401k.
The only way to know that 401k is no good, is to do it better and compare.

Good for you but OP wasn’t asking what she should have done differently 20-25 years ago.

[Anonymous]

It is surprisingly difficult for people whose parents went to college, knew how to navigate college choices, pick majors, the impact of networking, how to invest (where to look for information, whom to trust), how to buy real estate, understand what a maze it is for someone who had none of that direction. Where to even look or understand the terminology of many scenarios. Then, as you get older, you realize just how much money people have accumulated with the help of not just direction, but economic assistance here and there over time and then sometimes a whopping inheritance on top of it all. It all adds up. Just "studying hard" does not come close to it all.

That said, while you might have missed out on that direction early on, there is good advice on this thread - there is no time like the present to place yourself in a place of security - for you. Now is not the time to compare if you are older. Learn enough to ensure your economic security for later years.

[Anonymous]

what was your major and grad school major?
choices have consequences