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Every time I think I’m catching up I find my frame of reference is badly outdated and I am falling further and further behind. At this point most of the people I started life with have made fortunes and married well and I have done neither. The discrepancies really compound over time. I’m the poor relation now with respect to my friends and family. I feel like everyone else has the playbook but me.
I studied hard did well in school went to grad school got a steady job make a decent income but didn’t do well investing, wasn’t able to buy a house at the right time, didn’t marry the right person and am now middle class. It seems like life keeps adding a zero onto the end of however much things cost. |
| Middle class is the prize, OP. You shouldn't be expecting anything else. |
| Do you have a roof over your head? Food in your stomach? Clothes to wear? A job? A healthy family? These are what really matter. |
+1. Stop trying to keep up with your perception of what the Jones’ have. You’re going to waste your life that way. |
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Comparison is the thief of joy.
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| OP. The thing is that by staying in the same place I’m downwardly mobile. I can’t afford the things I used to be able to. |
| Assuming here - You have 30-40 more years. What are you going to do differently OP? |
Sounds more like OP is in her 50s. |
Yes. |
| If you are a women your husband is a failure not you |
| My college roommate was diagnosed with a surprise tumor at 50 and died a year later. |
Neither is failure or they are both failures |
Sometimes you have to adjust your life plan OP. Don’t go down with the ship. |
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I did so today. Thought that we had more money in our savings than what we actually have.
But, it is ok. You never get more than what you are fated to get, and never before your time. |
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I am not sure if your friends who are married are happier than you so I don't think you are missing much to be honest. Marriage isn't easy. It works for some and doesn't for others. I am at the point where I wish I were single. I was already making $300k at 33 when I met DW, so it's not like I needed to get married to achieve wealth. I was already disciplined financially and invested well.
Here is my advice. Where do you want to be financially? What's the gap? And how are you going to fill the gap? You can do it OP I am rooting for you 😊 |