Needy friend who is paranoid about everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She has severe anxiety. You don’t have to stay friends with her, but it amazes me that people on DCUM don’t seem to understand mental illness at all.

This. Not that I would know what's wrong with her, but I decided that anything that is that extreme, has something to do mental illness and/or SN.

[Anonymous]

I'm guessing she is severely overwhelmed by what is happening in the world and you are maga.

[Anonymous]

Slow fade this person. They sound exhausting & annoying

[Anonymous]

She needs meds. No one has time for these people’s compulsive drama process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone have a friend like this? Everything upsets her so much in the world… her family, politics, this country, men, work, her contractors, and on and on. She’s worried she’ll be deported by ICE (even though she is American born, white Christian), she’s worried about texting anything political because someone might be reading her texts, she’s worried that she received a group email from a listserv discussing politics

How do you have patience for friends like these? She is a kind and good person overall

You being this het up about your friend's anxieties strongly suggests either compassion fatigue or a lack of emotional intelligence and boundaries on your part. Other people can worry without it being your problem, and if it taxes your patience, you need to set better boundaries about how much of their troubles you're willing to entertain and when.

But if you don't have patience for "friends like these", that's actually a you problem. Control what you can: yourself.

[Anonymous]

She is why god invented thumbs up and hearts for text messages. If she calls / texts don't respond right away. If she brings it up in person, change the subject.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She was probably born with a highly sensitive personality. As she grew up she developed significant anxiety, as is common with a personality type like that, and as a result she developed a lot of maladaptive coping mechanisms.

She would be helped by DBT therapy.

I agree with this poster. I have a close friend like this. It is extreme anxiety. As a friend, you can't fix the anxiety but perhaps you cam gently suggest therapy.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like anxiety.

[Anonymous]

She needs medication for her anxiety, and therapy to build awareness so she can go off meds one day if need be. Also, she has to understand that it's not OK to have Main Character syndrome. But she probably can't see that until she accepts that she has anxiety.

[Anonymous]

The problem is she thinks OP is her friend and OP clearly doesn't have any love for her, care about her or even like her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem is she thinks OP is her friend and OP clearly doesn't have any love for her, care about her or even like her.

When you dump your irrational anxieties on a friend or relative too often, it's hard for them to like you, PP. BTDT, with my anxious mother and one anxious friend (who is no longer a friend, I can't dump my mother).

[Anonymous]

It's also loneliness and no ine to talk to so she does a core dump,

[Anonymous]

I have a family member like this. I'm sympathetic to her level of anxiety because it must be a very difficult way to live. However, I do get irritated by how she turns everything into being about her. It wasn't her feeling awful for people who lost family members in Texas, it was her being irrationally anxious and stressed about her own kid at a camp where the chance of a flash flood was slim to none.
It's not feeling horrible for those being deported and the lives being disrupted, it's "omg should I cancel our trip?! What if we can't get back into the country?! What if they detain us?!" Even though they are the most basic white American people and there is no chance anything would happen.
It's not being upset over the fact that someone plowed their car into a crowd, it's obsessive texts over whether or not she should let her kids go to a town fair. Because who knows if someone drive into the crowd.

The turning everything into being about her is what pushes my patience with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is she thinks OP is her friend and OP clearly doesn't have any love for her, care about her or even like her.

When you dump your irrational anxieties on a friend or relative too often, it's hard for them to like you, PP. BTDT, with my anxious mother and one anxious friend (who is no longer a friend, I can't dump my mother).

Your failure to set boundaries is your fault. The victimese gives it away. Try saying no and letting go of your martyr complex.

[Anonymous]

They still publish the magazine Prevention.

Maybe she would benefit from a subscription to Prevention ?