Is it true that women go after the same men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it true that women go after the same men? Or is it an incel driven conspiracy theory?

In my experience, women are drawn to men who are in relationships with other women. Especially when the partner is beautiful, it signals to other women that this guy is desireable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All women only go after guys who check three boxes: at least 6 feet tall, make six figures, and have six-pack abs. But when you break that down, not many guys actually meet all those standards.

Only about 14% of men in the U.S. are over 6 feet tall. Around 25% make $100k or more. If you combine just those two, you’re already down to roughly 3.5% of men. Add in the six-pack requirement, and you’re probably looking at 1% or less.

So, every woman is chasing that 1%.

On the flip side, guys tend to have simpler preferences. They mostly want someone who’s attractive. There are a lot of beautiful women out there at any height and income range.

Agree. Our standards differ. 6’ tall never mattered - anyone over 5’6 was fine. Nor did 6-pack abs, though I did care a lot about fitness, and some muscle and it would definitely be a plus. And $100k is too low an income bar. I never dated under $200k (and I've made that much since my first post school job, too).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All women only go after guys who check three boxes: at least 6 feet tall, make six figures, and have six-pack abs. But when you break that down, not many guys actually meet all those standards.

Only about 14% of men in the U.S. are over 6 feet tall. Around 25% make $100k or more. If you combine just those two, you’re already down to roughly 3.5% of men. Add in the six-pack requirement, and you’re probably looking at 1% or less.

So, every woman is chasing that 1%.

On the flip side, guys tend to have simpler preferences. They mostly want someone who’s attractive. There are a lot of beautiful women out there at any height and income range.

Agree. Our standards differ. 6’ tall never mattered - anyone over 5’6 was fine. Nor did 6-pack abs, though I did care a lot about fitness, and some muscle and it would definitely be a plus. And $100k is too low an income bar. I never dated under $200k (and I've made that much since my first post school job, too).

Of course you are entitled to your own standards. But do you think it's realistic to exclude men who make less than $200k from your dating pool? And what makes a man who makes $100k less desirable than a man who makes $200k?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All women only go after guys who check three boxes: at least 6 feet tall, make six figures, and have six-pack abs. But when you break that down, not many guys actually meet all those standards

I… just don’t get this take, especially the words “all” and “only.” When I look around, I see many, many men who don’t fit this description who are happily married. Before I was married, my friends and I were looking for kind and compatible, some sort of physical spark, and someone who had or was on their way to a career of some type (and I don’t mean doctor/lawyer/finance, I mean any type of self-sustaining career).

My husband now fits the 6 figures criterion, but we certainly didn’t expect that when we were younger. (He went back to school and switched careers from social work to software development.) 6 feet and a 6 pack were never in the cards. (To me, 6 pack often indicates “vain gym rat” as being strong and healthy does not require this.)

When people say this, they actually talking about stereotypically hot women? The type of women that these men consider to be high-value, and who attach a lot of importance to appearance?

Because if what you’re actually saying is “hot people who highly primarily value looks and money want other hot people who primarily value looks and money,” well, duh. But that’s very, very different than “all” women, and would go both ways with women and men.

I don’t know. I think you’re wrong. I have literally never seen a man under six feet tall or without six pack abs with a child or a wife.

[Anonymous]

I divorced late in life. I scroll through the apps and just swipe left on all of them. These men look like my friends’ husbands. I know they love them, but holy moly, not a physically attractive one in the bunch.

[Anonymous]

Men do this too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is it true that women go after the same men? Or is it an incel driven conspiracy theory?

In my experience, women are drawn to men who are in relationships with other women. Especially when the partner is beautiful, it signals to other women that this guy is desireable.

So true. Not all women are like this but many are. I always got more attention from women after they saw me with another woman.

[Anonymous]

Of course it is incel garbage.

The hottest women have the largest choice of men, as the hottest men have largest choice of women.

That doesn’t therefore mean that all women only want the hottest men. Go to any Walmart and look around you and you will see all sorts of objectively unattractive people paired up.

Incels just don’t want to acknowledge that something about them (appearance, personality, behavior) makes them unattractive to the women they want to date, so therefore they blame the women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I divorced late in life. I scroll through the apps and just swipe left on all of them. These men look like my friends’ husbands. I know they love them, but holy moly, not a physically attractive one in the bunch.

Your friends are still married while you are divorced. Perhaps you are the physically unattractive one.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know. I think you’re wrong. I have literally never seen a man under six feet tall or without six pack abs with a child or a wife.

Head to the nearest beach or amusement park. You will see plenty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All women only go after guys who check three boxes: at least 6 feet tall, make six figures, and have six-pack abs. But when you break that down, not many guys actually meet all those standards

I… just don’t get this take, especially the words “all” and “only.” When I look around, I see many, many men who don’t fit this description who are happily married. Before I was married, my friends and I were looking for kind and compatible, some sort of physical spark, and someone who had or was on their way to a career of some type (and I don’t mean doctor/lawyer/finance, I mean any type of self-sustaining career).

My husband now fits the 6 figures criterion, but we certainly didn’t expect that when we were younger. (He went back to school and switched careers from social work to software development.) 6 feet and a 6 pack were never in the cards. (To me, 6 pack often indicates “vain gym rat” as being strong and healthy does not require this.)

When people say this, they actually talking about stereotypically hot women? The type of women that these men consider to be high-value, and who attach a lot of importance to appearance?

Because if what you’re actually saying is “hot people who highly primarily value looks and money want other hot people who primarily value looks and money,” well, duh. But that’s very, very different than “all” women, and would go both ways with women and men.

I don’t know. I think you’re wrong. I have literally never seen a man under six feet tall or without six pack abs with a child or a wife.

You need to get out more. Seriously. How can this be?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course it is incel garbage.

The hottest women have the largest choice of men, as the hottest men have largest choice of women.

That doesn’t therefore mean that all women only want the hottest men. Go to any Walmart and look around you and you will see all sorts of objectively unattractive people paired up.

Incels just don’t want to acknowledge that something about them (appearance, personality, behavior) makes them unattractive to the women they want to date, so therefore they blame the women.

You cannot always get what you want. They paired up with unattractive people because that’s the best they could get. Ask them what their first choice was and you’ll learn that it’s not what they ended up with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Of course it is incel garbage.

The hottest women have the largest choice of men, as the hottest men have largest choice of women.

That doesn’t therefore mean that all women only want the hottest men. Go to any Walmart and look around you and you will see all sorts of objectively unattractive people paired up.

Incels just don’t want to acknowledge that something about them (appearance, personality, behavior) makes them unattractive to the women they want to date, so therefore they blame the women.

You cannot always get what you want. They paired up with unattractive people because that’s the best they could get. Ask them what their first choice was and you’ll learn that it’s not what they ended up with.

You might be surprised to learn that people can be very happy with their marriages even if they are and their partners don’t walk the runway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The men I hear stay that are the ones who complain that women don't like "nice" guys. The problem with being a "nice" guy is that you are too agreeable and that's a turn off for a lot women.

Uh no. Women like nice guys. Men who call themselves "nice guys" are men who think you put one "nice" in and one "sex" pops out. And if it doesnt, they get very very non-nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All women only go after guys who check three boxes: at least 6 feet tall, make six figures, and have six-pack abs. But when you break that down, not many guys actually meet all those standards

I… just don’t get this take, especially the words “all” and “only.” When I look around, I see many, many men who don’t fit this description who are happily married. Before I was married, my friends and I were looking for kind and compatible, some sort of physical spark, and someone who had or was on their way to a career of some type (and I don’t mean doctor/lawyer/finance, I mean any type of self-sustaining career).

My husband now fits the 6 figures criterion, but we certainly didn’t expect that when we were younger. (He went back to school and switched careers from social work to software development.) 6 feet and a 6 pack were never in the cards. (To me, 6 pack often indicates “vain gym rat” as being strong and healthy does not require this.)

When people say this, they actually talking about stereotypically hot women? The type of women that these men consider to be high-value, and who attach a lot of importance to appearance?

Because if what you’re actually saying is “hot people who highly primarily value looks and money want other hot people who primarily value looks and money,” well, duh. But that’s very, very different than “all” women, and would go both ways with women and men.

I don’t know. I think you’re wrong. I have literally never seen a man under six feet tall or without six pack abs with a child or a wife.

You need to get out more. Seriously. How can this be?

Yeah what? I dont think I know even one dad with 6 pack abs.