I think autistic DS is about to be fired
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Anonymous
| Well what was the conversation about? |
Anonymous
| I almost got fired from my first summer job (luckily the clock just ran out). But in retrospect, the manager was a d*ck. Not that I couldn’t have done some things better, but I didn’t have a fully developed brain and no experience in the world. I got another job later in a bookstore, and was well-liked, trusted and appreciated. Manager was more laid back, quirkier etc. Fit does matter and it’s a stinkin’ summer job. Just good for thought |
Anonymous
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What was the separate conversation about?
My husband and son are on the spectrum, and my husband, a research scientist who holds a PhD, has been let go numerous times. He's incredibly good at what he does, but he doesn't pick up non-verbal cues and his perfectionism makes him slow. My son has just been hired again for the same job he had last summer, as a STEM camp counselor. They did need to talk to him last year about not eating in the classroom, because it makes the students hungry, and they're not allowed to eat - that's was a lack of social awareness on his part. He's a rule-follower, but realistically, people can't create a ton of rules just for him, when everyone else knows not to do certain things. I can't tell you how relieved I was that they found him unobjectionable enough to be rehired! He must have done OK on the rest. So... maybe it's not as dire as you think? Fingers crossed, OP. |
Anonymous
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My teen doesn't have autism but was fired from his first job last year after several months of working there. He was devastated and DH and I took it as a learning opportunity to talk to him about it. Do the same. It took a long time. He vented for a while, he was mad but eventually could rationally talk about it. We calmly talked about it and what happened. The conversations were short and numerous, at random times when he was ready and could reflect on the entire experience.
Overall the job and getting fired from it was a great learning experience on working with and working for other people. |
Anonymous
| I am sorry- I would say that most professionals are going to "get it" more than the average life guard manager |
Anonymous
What was the separate conversation about? |
Anonymous
What did they say during the separate conversation? |
Anonymous
| Why are you so vague op?! |
Anonymous
I don't think OP has many details. Her son doesn't seem to have any insight, and other than having less hours and this meeting , she doesn't have any more info on why he may be getting fired. |
Anonymous
| He’s in college, so he may be a good candidate for a temporary position in an office! Has he applied to any temporary agencies - that might be better than a job in retail/at a pool! |
Anonymous
| If DS can't explain the separate conversation then it's not looking good. Is there any possibility of having it again with OP there, or at least a summary? It sounds like missing rules,unspoken norms, maybe communication problems, |
Anonymous
| Why is everyone assuming the separate conversation already happened? She said he was called in for one — o assumed that meant he hasn’t gone in yet so she doesn’t know of it will be a “this isn’t working out” conversation. |
Anonymous
| I’m sorry for your situation. If you’re looking for another summer job that might be a better fit, he could do valet especially at the hospital/clinics. Straightforward, not a ton of interpersonal politics. |
Anonymous
If OP’s child doesn’t have strong motor skills, he may not be coordinated enough to drive unfamiliar cars. |
Anonymous
If it is in the future OP can coach DS to take notes if capable of that. Ask questions. Note answers. Ask for followup feedback on progress if improvements needed. Specify improvements and metrics. |