Can anyone think of a society that doesn't value community?

[Anonymous]

We live in Arlington and don't know the names of any neighbors. The ones we knew moved. Nobody presses community on us, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the US we are pushed with the idea we need community, a friend group, to know our neighbors, etc. And I don't have any of that and feel lonely. But after giving it deep thought I realized I don't WANT that and maybe I only feel lonely because I'm being told what the ideal is. So what if the ideal what more independent? Is there some society or place I could move where I could just have a dog, and see people like once a week when I go buy food and a couple times a year to take the dog to the vet?

Sure

You can “value” community for all the wrong reasons. Like chastising women, or brainwashing cult members, or motivating radicalized killing of XYZ whom you hate.

Or you can value community for positive strengths and universal values, like cohesive families, active parenting, having morals, staying away from human vices, and controlling for human nature (power & greed).

[Anonymous]

Other issue today is people *think* they have a real community via online social meeting groups and posts. They don’t. Those are fickle and often posters are not whom they say they are. Doomscrolling is rampant

[Anonymous]

Real communities have traditions they maintain and are helpful:

Sport team players
Church or temple or mosque active members
Active alumni groups
Sororities and fraternities
Neighborhoods that are friendly and caring/ look out for another
In person hobby groups
Extended families with traditions and gatherings

[Anonymous]

DCUM is MY community!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the US we are pushed with the idea we need community, a friend group, to know our neighbors, etc.

And I don't have any of that and feel lonely. But after giving it deep thought I realized I don't WANT that and maybe I only feel lonely because I'm being told what the ideal is.

So what if the ideal what more independent?

Is there some society or place I could move where I could just have a dog, and see people like once a week when I go buy food and a couple times a year to take the dog to the vet?

You can be a social outcast, or estrange yourself, or isolate yourself anywhere in the world Op. it’s not an America only thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the US we are pushed with the idea we need community, a friend group, to know our neighbors, etc.

And I don't have any of that and feel lonely. But after giving it deep thought I realized I don't WANT that and maybe I only feel lonely because I'm being told what the ideal is.

So what if the ideal what more independent? Is there some society or place I could move where I could just have a dog, and see people like once a week when I go buy food and a couple times a year to take the dog to the vet?

I dont think that is pushed in America at all. It should be, but isn’t.

It is in many other countries and communities. Sometimes out of economic necessity, sometimes out of strong traditions or religious ties.

I don’t think anyone anywhere cares if you want to lone wolf it. Your parents and siblings might be sad. But you likely don’t care about that or them.

[Anonymous]

The US is by far the most individualistic, least communal country in the world. You’re not going to find anything more than that somewhere else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Real communities have traditions they maintain and are helpful:

Sport team players
Church or temple or mosque active members
Active alumni groups
Sororities and fraternities
Neighborhoods that are friendly and caring/ look out for another
In person hobby groups
Extended families with traditions and gatherings

Sportball is dumb.
Religion is a threat to government.
Only HYP please.
Filled with racists and homophobes.
My neighbors are spying on me.
What is a hobby?
I won't talk to my MAGA family.
--DCUM

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think one can easily live this way in the US, especially in a more urban environment. I think the US is more focused on the individual than it is on community and we are also okay with moving far from family and cutting ties if we need to. You can pick up and start over without needing to keep ancestral ties to a place or to others. But yes, people talk about neighbors and so forth and you won't get privacy in a small town except maybe in the Pacific Northeest where they have the so-called chill. I think you just live your life how you want.

I agree. We are very self-centered and individualistic vs. many other cultures.

[Anonymous]

Seattle and Washington state! I hated it so we moved but it’s gorgeous. If I was like this I would move there!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DCUM is MY community!

We're here for you babe. We'll tell you if you're tacky. But don't charge us for potluck or we'll unceremoniously dump you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I live in the Pacific Northwest and the broader culture here does not value community in the way I have experienced in the American Midwest, the east coast, NYC, Texas, London, and much of Asia.

It’s a very interesting phenomenon that has been well-studied locally. Some believe it has to do with the area’s early Nordic immigrants, and others think that tech wealth and libertarian politics have sustained it. It affects socializing here and definitely affects civic engagement and government effectiveness.

This is interesting, I’d love to hear more about it. How does it manifest? What is it like in your neighborhood?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think one can easily live this way in the US, especially in a more urban environment. I think the US is more focused on the individual than it is on community and we are also okay with moving far from family and cutting ties if we need to. You can pick up and start over without needing to keep ancestral ties to a place or to others. But yes, people talk about neighbors and so forth and you won't get privacy in a small town except maybe in the Pacific Northeest where they have the so-called chill. I think you just live your life how you want.

+1. When I saw the title of OP’s thread, I immediately thought “the US is that place”.

[Anonymous]

There is no shared culture nor history here. Increasingly a nation of strangers probably because of high immigration.
Add to that the lack of American culture. Look, this place doesn't have a long history and politics fills the void where culture would be in another, older, society.

This is a country of doublespeak. Liberalism and freedom constantly waved throughout its history despite the shameful stain of slavery and half the country's unwillingness to end it. So when you hear terms like "community" used, remember the doubles peak. Community doesn't really exist and is nit a priority in policy making.