Neighbor called police when child had loud meltdown

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whoever called is an ahole. Sorry you had to experience that. Have they apologized to you?

So, you’re saying that you would WANT your neighbors to hear your child screaming — and ignore it?

I’m making some assumptions here that might not be true. The first is that it sounds like the OP wrote the note to the neighbor after this incident. Imagine if she had already known the neighbors well enough— so that they already would have thought to call, and even offer help before calling the police for assistance. I’m assuming that the neighbor meant well here.
I think the OP has the right take here. As difficult as the situation has been for her, at least she has a neighbor who cared enough to verify that her child was not in danger.

Have to agree with this. I have a friend who very well could live next to OP. One of the first times I was over her house, I overheard the neighbor's child have a meltdown and it was alarming. It absolutely sounded like the child could have been in danger. Thankfully my friend knew the situation and that she wasn't in danger. But had I heard that without knowing? I probably would have seriously considered calling the cops. Would I feel guilty that I'd have upset OP like she is? Yes of course and I'd be so embarrassed as well. But I would feel a hell of a lot worse if I found out I'd witnessed that kid being abused and did nothing about it.

[Anonymous]

Sometimes you get busybody neighbors like that who stick their nose into everyone's business.

Be firm and let them know they crossed a line and had better never ever do it again. Usually that will do the trick.

If it doesn't, get a restraining order.

[Anonymous]

Another lesson here is the we need to get to know our neighbors again.

[Anonymous]

Well next time I hear someone screaming I will just ignore.

[Anonymous]

I’ve only ever had to call the cops once, but all I heard was screaming, banging, what sounded like furniture being thrown, etc. I didn’t know who was doing what, but obviously something was going on. It isn’t personal, they heard scary sounds and wanted to make sure everyone was safe.

It’s nice to have a neighbour that watches out for you.

[Anonymous]

I had this happen - my kid was crying at the bus stop for having to go to school. She’s a little bit of a drama queen and admits it. I’m also a minority mom, so I do wonder what “the neighbors” think.

So a passing mom (who happens to be a teacher at her school) called the police. I found out who called (days later) because my kid told me and so did the passing mom. I did thank her for calling and my kid for confirming what happened. The police did come visit and performed a welfare check. I was surprised but I was glad that someone cared about my kid. The police also verified my kid was at school and was doing ok. It’s not a big deal unless you’re hiding something and the bar for that is pretty high (not just being gay or using pot, but like having a sex offender boyfriend.) The kid does need to be where you think they are. If they’re not, the cops will look at mom and dad. A minority might have a harder time because cops might not understand different cultures or people with disabilities (who are all different.)

Putting cameras in seems a little extreme. Know your rights, behave like a lady. If the cop mouths off you can report them. I’ve done that before. You seem overly anxious for what sounds like a shitty morning, but one where the process worked as it should.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teach your kid not to scream.

Moron.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had this happen - my kid was crying at the bus stop for having to go to school. She’s a little bit of a drama queen and admits it. I’m also a minority mom, so I do wonder what “the neighbors” think.

So a passing mom (who happens to be a teacher at her school) called the police. I found out who called (days later) because my kid told me and so did the passing mom. I did thank her for calling and my kid for confirming what happened. The police did come visit and performed a welfare check. I was surprised but I was glad that someone cared about my kid. The police also verified my kid was at school and was doing ok. It’s not a big deal unless you’re hiding something and the bar for that is pretty high (not just being gay or using pot, but like having a sex offender boyfriend.) The kid does need to be where you think they are. If they’re not, the cops will look at mom and dad. A minority might have a harder time because cops might not understand different cultures or people with disabilities (who are all different.)

Putting cameras in seems a little extreme. Know your rights, behave like a lady. If the cop mouths off you can report them. I’ve done that before. You seem overly anxious for what sounds like a shitty morning, but one where the process worked as it should.

LOL at the busybody teacher trying to paint herself as some angel.

[Anonymous]

These types of calls are very common. I listen to police scanner traffic for work.

[Anonymous]

OP, I would not expect a response from the neighbor, who maybe just wanted quiet.

I’ve been in your shoes and it is very hard.

A camera may not be a bad idea.

[Anonymous]

I think it is a bit concerning that you are so upset and overreacting to the fact that a neighbour called when they heard sounds that made them think a child could be being harmed and you are so terrified of police checking it out to be sure all is well.

Neighbours and teachers and others should report potential harm to a child and cps or police should do a check to be sure the child is okay. That shouldn't be something you are so adamently against and horrified by.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whoever called is an ahole. Sorry you had to experience that. Have they apologized to you?

You're crazy. What if the child was screaming because someone was abusing him, or someone was hurting his parent, or an intruder was entering the home?

I didn't call the police, but one time, I called my neighbor because I heard her older teenage daughter screaming at the top of her lungs. Very loudly. I feared she was there alone with her boyfriend, and a DV situation was occurring. So I called my neighbor, and it turns out my neighbor was home, and they were arguing. Her daughter was screaming at her. I was embarrassed, but I wouldn't have forgiven myself if something terrible was happening, and I just listened and did nothing.

What if the police harmed the family because of your call? Would you forgive yourself then?

I think your choice was reasonable, but there’s no “get out of regret free” card for life. Every decision can go wrong.

[Anonymous]

Yikes
May want to get cameras.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whoever called is an ahole. Sorry you had to experience that. Have they apologized to you?

You're crazy. What if the child was screaming because someone was abusing him, or someone was hurting his parent, or an intruder was entering the home?

I didn't call the police, but one time, I called my neighbor because I heard her older teenage daughter screaming at the top of her lungs. Very loudly. I feared she was there alone with her boyfriend, and a DV situation was occurring. So I called my neighbor, and it turns out my neighbor was home, and they were arguing. Her daughter was screaming at her. I was embarrassed, but I wouldn't have forgiven myself if something terrible was happening, and I just listened and did nothing.

What if the police harmed the family because of your call? Would you forgive yourself then?

I think your choice was reasonable, but there’s no “get out of regret free” card for life. Every decision can go wrong.

THIS. So much of this. Most police now are quite dangerous and trigger happy. It's from hiring ex military and bottom of the barrel.

Too many police with a respect-my-authority complex that like to place socialist stazi gestapo with their immunity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it is a bit concerning that you are so upset and overreacting to the fact that a neighbour called when they heard sounds that made them think a child could be being harmed and you are so terrified of police checking it out to be sure all is well.

Neighbours and teachers and others should report potential harm to a child and cps or police should do a check to be sure the child is okay. That shouldn't be something you are so adamently against and horrified by.

In the UK that might be normal. Not so much here in the US though.