So you let your kids read at the dining table

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you let them read during meals?

Generally only breakfast, when kids are eating separately because of different school starts. If there’s anyone else at the table, no.

This is what we tend to do. But only my son and I read while eating, DH does not.

My son and I often eat dinner together without DH Once in awhile I suggest reading dinner and we read our separate books (as a treat, usually when DS has a book he is really into).

[Anonymous]

No, books are not allowed at the table. I have a 9 year old with adhd who gets very lost in books. We have constant battles because he is always trying to read but then doesnt actually eat his food and takes way to long and makes everyone late. Or he drops half his food on the floor because he's not paying attention to his body. So for him, even if he is eating breakfast alone at the table, no books. He can read after he eats.

I will allow a book if we are going out to eat and i know the wait is going to be long, but it has to be put away when the food arrives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People can read during casual meals, but not during a family dinner.

Same for us. But sometimes dinner is casual and sometimes brunch is not. It’s really situation dependent. Like last night most of us were really tired so reading was allowed. Those who were talkative carried on conversations.

[Anonymous]

We allow it. No devices, but books are fine. It's not every meal, but I'll never say no to a kid's nose in a book.

[Anonymous]

My kids can read whenever they want. But, they know how to engage when appropriate, so we don’t need rules about this.

But, really, reading? The real issue is kids glued to phones while eating.

[Anonymous]

I grew up being able to read at breakfast and lunch. Supper (as we called it!) when my dad was there- no.

So I did this with my own kids for years. At bday dinners the kids could decide “books” as a special treat. And if my DH wasn’t home, we all read.

When my kids would have a friend over and they’d be having a snack or early dinner my kids would lead their friend to the comic book shelf and encourage them to peruse one while eating- so they could! Haha.

At some point during later elementary school years we all just started reading even at dinner. We don’t read when grandparents or anyone else is over. I know it’s supposed to be healthier to mindfully focus on your plate but I’ve been reading and eating my whole life and have done okay I think.

No phones or devices- just books, the newspaper, magazines, comic books.

OP- are you wondering whether to allow it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We allow it. No devices, but books are fine. It's not every meal, but I'll never say no to a kid's nose in a book.

While it may be better for the brain, it is every bit just as rude to be engaged in a book as a device. And every bit as distracting with the potential to cause delays even if you are alone. There are indeed many times when it would be better parenting to say "no to a kids nose in a book".

[Anonymous]

I did this growing up. I loved reading. But I was an only child with a SAHM and I spent a ton of time talking to my parents. So there was less focus on family meals as the main time to have those conversations.

[Anonymous]

No, it's no different than screens. It's still incredibly bad manners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, we used to have “reading dinner” every Tuesday night. We enjoyed it.

This is super cute!

[Anonymous]

Yes, I let my elementary age kids read at the table at breakfast when we are all coming and going. If we need to do a family check in to plan for the day, I ask everyone to look up for a few minutes.

If one kid is eating to get ready for sports or we’re not having a full meal as a group, I also let them read because it keeps my kids from fighting and it keeps my super slow eater at the table - otherwise he gets bored and wanders off and then wonders why he is hungry 30 min later.

If we sit down to a family meal, we put away books and phones/iPads and talk to each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We allow it. No devices, but books are fine. It's not every meal, but I'll never say no to a kid's nose in a book.

While it may be better for the brain, it is every bit just as rude to be engaged in a book as a device. And every bit as distracting with the potential to cause delays even if you are alone. There are indeed many times when it would be better parenting to say "no to a kids nose in a book".

Maybe better parenting to YOU. Not better parenting to every kid or every situation. MYOB.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I'd be so happy if my kids read actual books they can read anywhere they darn well please.

[Anonymous]

Manners and rudeness aren't written in stone; if your family decides that, at family meals, reading at the table isn't a rule, it ceases to be rude.

Your kid should probably know that many people don't operate that way, and be able to get through a meal making conversation, but you don't need to practice that every night. My own kid reads during dinner pretty often, but she's also able to sit still during Christmas dinner with her grandparents without one.

Unless it's a problem to get a kid to stop reading when they're told not to, I don't see it as an issue at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We allow it. No devices, but books are fine. It's not every meal, but I'll never say no to a kid's nose in a book.

While it may be better for the brain, it is every bit just as rude to be engaged in a book as a device. And every bit as distracting with the potential to cause delays even if you are alone. There are indeed many times when it would be better parenting to say "no to a kids nose in a book".

I'll also put my kids brain growth above some random persons rule of rudeness as well.