Split shifts with a newborn - need advice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have him do one overnight feed so you can get a 3-5 hour chunk of sleep. It’ll be fine. Essentially you’d be on duty say from 9pm-2am. You sleep when the baby does, then let’s say your husband does 2am to 6am or 7am. You could pump at 2am for ten minutes. He can bottle feed the baby the expressed milk (at 4 days postpartum, you may not make enough for him to feed in a bottle, so you could use formula until you’re producing enough.) your supply will be fine for four hours of sleep and that consecutive chunk of sleep will make a big difference for you.

I’ll also add that I pump a couple of times during the day. I try to pump 2x-3x daily after feeds. I am two weeks postpartum.

I’m the OP. Congratulations!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not really for breastfeeding but everyone is different. Night milk is highest production and 5 hour is a long time. Again DH can bring you baby, let them nurse and you go back to sleep. Even getting 2-3 he stretches 2-3 times is helpful those first week.
Also learn how to do supervised contact naps in those early weeks. They are restorative for you and good for baby.

I’m the OP. I’m open to advice. What do you recommend? I’m currently feeding every 1.5-3 hours and I pump twice a day.

[Anonymous]

I was able to stretch my kids’ feeds to about four hours within 1-2 weeks and it had no impact on my supply. I did all the night shifts but I never changed a diaper unless the baby pooped. That keeps everyone half asleep and you will hopefully be able to go back to sleep quickly

[Anonymous]

The first few weeks are brutal. It’s insane how little sleep you get when feeding a new newborn. Like torture. Yes, taking shifts will impact your supply. Even a 4-5 hour sleep will impact it some. The question is how much. If you have abundant supply, it won’t matter. If you have too little/just enough, it will be noticeable. I recommend you take it a day at a time. If you can make it 2, 3, 4 weeks, the sleep intervals get longer bit by bit. But only if you can do so without being a total disaster. It’s really a judgment call on what’s best for your circumstances.

I had postpartum hemorrhage with my first and was extremely weak, so I did have to take longer sleep shifts from the beginning with that kid. So I know it is sometimes necessary and it can be different each time. The benefit was my husband was really capable with the baby from day 1 and still is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was able to stretch my kids’ feeds to about four hours within 1-2 weeks and it had no impact on my supply. I did all the night shifts but I never changed a diaper unless the baby pooped. That keeps everyone half asleep and you will hopefully be able to go back to sleep quickly

I’m the OP. Is that safe? I know they need to eat frequently for the first couple of weeks or months.

I don’t like the idea of not changing at night. Seems unsanitary and just uncomfortable for the baby.

[Anonymous]

You have a newborn so no, you can’t get 5 hours sleep straight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have a newborn so no, you can’t get 5 hours sleep straight.

I’m the OP. How long can I go? Realistically?

I don’t mind if my supply dips some but I do want to be able to breastfeed.

I eat a lot of calories ( really nourishing) and drink lots of water. I’m nursing 10-12 times a day and pump twice. I’m hoping that can help me maintain my supply as it’s just starting.

[Anonymous]

My partner did the midnight and 5am feeds, so he got 5ish hours of uninterrupted sleep (plus some time on either end). And I also got 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep. He used either pumped milk or formula depending on what was available. It was a relief to me that my kid could easily switch between bottle and breast and between formula and breastmilk. And getting a stretch of uninterrupted sleep helped SO much. I think we instituted that plan when our kid was about 2 weeks old. The first two weeks were total chaos, but we eventually got in a rhythm of alternating overnight and it was great.

My supply was OK—I never built up a huge freezer stash, but I was fine using formula whenever needed. I liked breastfeeding for the convenience and connection, but loved that formula was always an option so I never had to stress about pumping around the clock. I pumped once a day (after a feeding) if I had time, and I usually only got 3-4 ounces.

Oh, and we only changed poop diapers over night (and those were rare). She didn’t have sensitive skin and was fine overnight in a wet diaper. No diaper rash at all. Some kids can’t tolerate that, but our baby was fine with no overnight diaper changes. Non-cloth diapers really do keep the moisture away from skin.

Once I went back to work, I breastfed in the morning, when I got home from work, and before her bedtime…and that was it. She was on formula (and then regular milk) the rest of the day. As I said, I loved breastfeeding…but also felt fine about formula and the mix worked for us. My kid is still really flexible about eating now.

[Anonymous]

Just want to remind you that you are really in the trenches - days 3-5 were always the hardest for me! Have you talked to a lactation consultant? Generally they can do a telemedicine consult to talk through something like this - I did it with both of mine. My personal experience was that I couldn't sleep longer than 3 or maybe 3.5 hours for the first couple of weeks as baby was figuring out life on the outside and my supply was regulating, but after that, we were able to figure out a shift system that didn't affect my supply. In our case, I did still get less sleep than DH, but I could get a good 4 hour stretch for myself most nights by the time he was 4 weeks old.
Also, just in case no one else is telling you this (because I wish someone had to me with my first) - breastfeeding is amazing, but so is formula. I've done both. You're an amazing mom either way. Taking care of yourself IS taking care of your baby, and formula can sometimes be part of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have a newborn so no, you can’t get 5 hours sleep straight.

I’m the OP. How long can I go? Realistically?

I don’t mind if my supply dips some but I do want to be able to breastfeed.

I eat a lot of calories ( really nourishing) and drink lots of water. I’m nursing 10-12 times a day and pump twice. I’m hoping that can help me maintain my supply as it’s just starting.

Gently, no one can tell you specifically how long. Everyone's body is different. I would recommend speaking to a lactation consultant, sharing as much as you can about how your supply is so far, and asking for their advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lack of sleep will interfere with your supply more

Not true. I had/have the worst sleeping child in human history and had an oversupply despite waking 20+ times a night for years.

[Anonymous]

OP sleep is the single most important thing in the postpartum period. All else, including breastfeeding, needs to be a distant second. If your supply drops, combo feed. I’ve been through sleep deprivation hell, exclusive breastfeeding, and combo feeding. Shifts and sleep sounds great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My partner did the midnight and 5am feeds, so he got 5ish hours of uninterrupted sleep (plus some time on either end). And I also got 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep. He used either pumped milk or formula depending on what was available. It was a relief to me that my kid could easily switch between bottle and breast and between formula and breastmilk. And getting a stretch of uninterrupted sleep helped SO much. I think we instituted that plan when our kid was about 2 weeks old. The first two weeks were total chaos, but we eventually got in a rhythm of alternating overnight and it was great.

My supply was OK—I never built up a huge freezer stash, but I was fine using formula whenever needed. I liked breastfeeding for the convenience and connection, but loved that formula was always an option so I never had to stress about pumping around the clock. I pumped once a day (after a feeding) if I had time, and I usually only got 3-4 ounces.

Oh, and we only changed poop diapers over night (and those were rare). She didn’t have sensitive skin and was fine overnight in a wet diaper. No diaper rash at all. Some kids can’t tolerate that, but our baby was fine with no overnight diaper changes. Non-cloth diapers really do keep the moisture away from skin.

Once I went back to work, I breastfed in the morning, when I got home from work, and before her bedtime…and that was it. She was on formula (and then regular milk) the rest of the day. As I said, I loved breastfeeding…but also felt fine about formula and the mix worked for us. My kid is still really flexible about eating now.

I’m the OP. Same with the freezer stash comment. I don’t need a huge stash or really one at all. I would really love to be able to breastfeed during my 16 weeks maternity leave. The ease, health benefits, and the connection is something I’m really interested in. I’m also open to formula for supplement as needed.

I’m more comfortable changing diaper at each feeding. We use pampers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We went to bed at some ludicrous hour like 7pm so all the incremental sleep added up to 8 hours.

Yes, this. You don’t need the sleep to be contiguous. Also, I know it’s controversial, but we coslept. That way I never needed to fully wake up. Just roll over, nurse, and go back to sleep when baby finishes eating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just want to remind you that you are really in the trenches - days 3-5 were always the hardest for me! Have you talked to a lactation consultant? Generally they can do a telemedicine consult to talk through something like this - I did it with both of mine. My personal experience was that I couldn't sleep longer than 3 or maybe 3.5 hours for the first couple of weeks as baby was figuring out life on the outside and my supply was regulating, but after that, we were able to figure out a shift system that didn't affect my supply. In our case, I did still get less sleep than DH, but I could get a good 4 hour stretch for myself most nights by the time he was 4 weeks old.
Also, just in case no one else is telling you this (because I wish someone had to me with my first) - breastfeeding is amazing, but so is formula. I've done both. You're an amazing mom either way. Taking care of yourself IS taking care of your baby, and formula can sometimes be part of that.

I’m the OP. I saw one in the hospital and have an in-person consultation with on Friday. Breastfeeding has been going well though. It’s harder because it takes a lot more time than I thought, the pain/soreness is unexpected, and we are still figuring things out.