Split shifts with a newborn - need advice?

[Anonymous]

I had my first 4 days ago and breastfeeding and lack of sleep is getting to be a lot. I’m thankful I have a wonderful husband who is super involved and hands on but both of us up is not helping. We have decided talking shifts might be a better option so both of us are well rested but I know that will interfere with my supply as it’s so early on. Is this logical? How badly will this impact my supply?

[Anonymous]

Lack of sleep will interfere with your supply more

[Anonymous]

Breastmilk isn’t magic. You need sleep and if you dint get it, you’ll lose your mind. Give us breastfeeding if it’s too much. Nobody other than you cares. Really.

[Anonymous]

At that age you will probably need to keep breastfeeding, but you can have dh wake up, bring you the baby, and change the diaper and put them back to bed so you can just stay asleep.

When you're ready to start pumping and baby will take a bottle, you can skip one night feed.

Being tired is very normal and temporary.

[Anonymous]

We had a “rule” with both of our kids: there needs to be one adult who is getting sleep. Two adults with interrupted sleep is a disaster.

As the breastfeeding parent, that meant that I was the one getting up with the baby in the middle of the night and dealing with interrupted sleep. It helped me knowing that this was just what it was going to be. BUT during the day, I really didn’t do anything else. I slept as much as possible. When the baby slept, I slept. I wasn’t worried about meal prep or laundry or cleaning. My spouse, the one who was getting sleep, was taking care of that.

Hang in there. That approach worked for us, but it might not be best for you.

Congratulations.

[Anonymous]

Let your DH sleep while you nurse the baby. But he can change diapers at night and also take care of the baby during the day while you nap. It’s normal to be tired with a newborn. It doesn’t last forever.

[Anonymous]

I’m the OP. Is it possible to take a 4-5 hour night stretch and not fully tank my incoming supply? My milk came in day 3. He eats every 1.5-3 hours. I’m okay with some formula but would like to be able to breastfeed. My thought was to pump a little extra and feed from that to use formula during that stretch of sleep.

I was hopping we can do something like I feed and then sleep 11-4am and my husband then sleeps 4-9am and we take naps when we can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let your DH sleep while you nurse the baby. But he can change diapers at night and also take care of the baby during the day while you nap. It’s normal to be tired with a newborn. It doesn’t last forever.

I’m the OP. He is doing all the diaper changes and most of the baby care while I just rest and feed. I’m still feeding every 1.5-3 hours so I won’t get much sleep without sleeping a full 4-5 hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had a “rule” with both of our kids: there needs to be one adult who is getting sleep. Two adults with interrupted sleep is a disaster.

As the breastfeeding parent, that meant that I was the one getting up with the baby in the middle of the night and dealing with interrupted sleep. It helped me knowing that this was just what it was going to be. BUT during the day, I really didn’t do anything else. I slept as much as possible. When the baby slept, I slept. I wasn’t worried about meal prep or laundry or cleaning. My spouse, the one who was getting sleep, was taking care of that.

Hang in there. That approach worked for us, but it might not be best for you.

Congratulations.

This. You’re up at night but spouse does most of the chores. Also, make sure you go to bed as early as possible. I would BF my baby at 7, hand him off to my spouse, and go straight to bed. No tv, no phone, just sleep until the next feeding.

[Anonymous]

unfortunately it's still so early that if you want to keep breastfeeding, you probably shouldnt go 11-4 if you dont want to mess with supply. Not to mention it would be incredibly uncomfortable! I just had to suck it up until around 6-7 weeks, that's when my baby's sleep began to consolidate and he could go 4-5 hours at night without feeding and my supply was stable, the engorgement was under control etc. Until then I had to suck up the interrupted sleep, but let my husband do everything else. I mean everything. All the changing and burping and swaddling at night (and day). All the chores and cooking during the day.

[Anonymous]

We did shifts. Yes, it probably messed up my supply. We did 1/2 breast and 1/2 formula for the first 3-4 months, and then tapered off to full formula by 6 months.

We both got at least 6 hours of sleep a night/my mental health didn’t spiral, so it was a great trade off for us. I didn’t feel strongly about breastfeeding, and I had enough supply to keep that ratio for the time I wanted. I also think it helped keep my DH involved from day 1, as I wasn’t the number one parent ever.

[Anonymous]

We went to bed at some ludicrous hour like 7pm so all the incremental sleep added up to 8 hours.

[Anonymous]

Have him do one overnight feed so you can get a 3-5 hour chunk of sleep. It’ll be fine. Essentially you’d be on duty say from 9pm-2am. You sleep when the baby does, then let’s say your husband does 2am to 6am or 7am. You could pump at 2am for ten minutes. He can bottle feed the baby the expressed milk (at 4 days postpartum, you may not make enough for him to feed in a bottle, so you could use formula until you’re producing enough.) your supply will be fine for four hours of sleep and that consecutive chunk of sleep will make a big difference for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have him do one overnight feed so you can get a 3-5 hour chunk of sleep. It’ll be fine. Essentially you’d be on duty say from 9pm-2am. You sleep when the baby does, then let’s say your husband does 2am to 6am or 7am. You could pump at 2am for ten minutes. He can bottle feed the baby the expressed milk (at 4 days postpartum, you may not make enough for him to feed in a bottle, so you could use formula until you’re producing enough.) your supply will be fine for four hours of sleep and that consecutive chunk of sleep will make a big difference for you.

I’ll also add that I pump a couple of times during the day. I try to pump 2x-3x daily after feeds. I am two weeks postpartum.

[Anonymous]

Not really for breastfeeding but everyone is different. Night milk is highest production and 5 hour is a long time. Again DH can bring you baby, let them nurse and you go back to sleep. Even getting 2-3 he stretches 2-3 times is helpful those first week.
Also learn how to do supervised contact naps in those early weeks. They are restorative for you and good for baby.