What can I do to feel safer at night?

[Anonymous]

Cognitive behavioral therapy

[Anonymous]

Agree. You have an anxiety problem and you will be healthier and happier once you face that head on.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is an excellent place to start. Good luck

[Anonymous]

Try cognitive behavioral therapy for your anxiety.

[Anonymous]

I was the same for many years when my husband traveled. I would leave the lights on downstairs during the night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m always amazed how many otherwise intelligent people earnestly think any random pet dog (regardless of breed) is going to defend them from an attacker. It’s pathetically hilarious.

A dog IS a great early-warning system, yes. They’re fantastic for that. But that’s all.

But your pet dog is absolutely no deterrent at all to a person intent on doing you harm. Either the dog will bark and be confused, will flee and hide behind you, or it might attempt
to bite an intruder, at which point it will be quickly dispatched with a weapon the intruder has likely brought with them in anticipation of neutralizing the dog.


Your dog’s greatest contribution to your safety is alerting you to the presence of a stranger. It’s up to you to deal with them. Because an actual criminal isn’t the least little bit scared of your labradoodle or pit bull or german shepherd.

The dog is for the OP, not necessarily to attack an intruder. Someone else moving around the house with you and aware of strange sounds is a comfort for many.

You're the OP of the dog-hating thread, no?

[Anonymous]

prozac and grow up.

[Anonymous]

if you are not scared with your dh there, why are you scared without him
Makes no sense at all. Is he Superman or Captain America? how can one man make you safe? If someone wishes you hard, harm they can easily do. this cognitive delusion is irrational and needs help.

[Anonymous]

This is anxiety and you’d be better off treating that than buying useless home security things. I realized that my baseless fear of someone coming into my house to hurt me stems from never feeling safe at home in childhood. My home wasn’t safe, so even now it’s hard for me to feel safe at night when my husband isn’t here and I feel vulnerable. But that’s a me issue- my neighborhood is safe, my doors are locked, home invasions are statistically rare. I have to work on the anxiety mindset over doing silly stuff like buying a gun.

[Anonymous]

Get a dog. Many prowlers won't enter a house with a dog.

If you can't get one then leave the lights on in the rest of the house. I would leave ESPN on the TV downstairs playing as well. I figured if someone saw lights and ESPN they would think a guy was home. I am such a scaredy cat I almost got a mannequin of a big male to sit on the recliner as well.

[Anonymous]

Security system, dog, weapon you are comfortable using, and self defense classes.

Ultimately the issue is you feel vulnerable, so you need to take steps to reduce/eliminate that feeling of vulnerability.

You also need to understand the goal. If you don’t feel vulnerable with your husband there all you need to do is replace his skill set. So most likely not a high bar to achieve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m always amazed how many otherwise intelligent people earnestly think any random pet dog (regardless of breed) is going to defend them from an attacker. It’s pathetically hilarious.

A dog IS a great early-warning system, yes. They’re fantastic for that. But that’s all.

But your pet dog is absolutely no deterrent at all to a person intent on doing you harm. Either the dog will bark and be confused, will flee and hide behind you, or it might attempt
to bite an intruder, at which point it will be quickly dispatched with a weapon the intruder has likely brought with them in anticipation of neutralizing the dog.


Your dog’s greatest contribution to your safety is alerting you to the presence of a stranger. It’s up to you to deal with them. Because an actual criminal isn’t the least little bit scared of your labradoodle or pit bull or german shepherd.

I’m a PP. I’ve had 4 dogs in my adult life. One I felt like would take a bullet for me. She was part shepherd. The others not so much. BUT they all provided a sense of comfort , that’s what OP is looking for.

[Anonymous]

It is absolutely true that a potential intruder will usually avoid a house where a dog is present. The dog doesn’t actually need to be a threat, though it helps if it sounds/looks like one. I have a Doberman (not by choice—I signed up to foster, this is what I got, and I love her so I kept her) and I can see on every walk how it has changed the way random people interact with me. Strangers want to avoid her.

So you will actually BE safer from a break-in. But just as important, you will feel more secure. I don’t suffer from anxiety but I also don’t love sleeping alone in our house. The dog helps a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m always amazed how many otherwise intelligent people earnestly think any random pet dog (regardless of breed) is going to defend them from an attacker. It’s pathetically hilarious.

A dog IS a great early-warning system, yes. They’re fantastic for that. But that’s all.

But your pet dog is absolutely no deterrent at all to a person intent on doing you harm. Either the dog will bark and be confused, will flee and hide behind you, or it might attempt
to bite an intruder, at which point it will be quickly dispatched with a weapon the intruder has likely brought with them in anticipation of neutralizing the dog.


Your dog’s greatest contribution to your safety is alerting you to the presence of a stranger. It’s up to you to deal with them. Because an actual criminal isn’t the least little bit scared of your labradoodle or pit bull or german shepherd.

Most people entering your home aren't intent on doing harm. They just want your valuables. And a barking animal is, in fact, a deterrent, when there are other homes down the street with no dog alarm. Burglars don't want the homeowner alerted to their presence.

[Anonymous]

I actually do think if someone is just looking for an easy target and they see a house with a German shepherd going crazy at the door, they’re going to move to another one. That being said don’t get a dog for this.

[Anonymous]

I also say dog. The biggest advantage of a dog is that it will weed out all the little noises you hear as nothing. Dogs are extremely good at sensing something out of the ordinary and any approach by a stranger vs all the mundane noises of the house. Therefore, you feel safe taking cues from the dog. If the dog is relaxed and lounging, you are all good.

My german sheperd will also run to wherever she hears a stranger coming (usually Amazon delivery) and start growling. She is an extremely mellow and sweet dog but that growl scares even me sometimes. I have no doubt it would deter intruders. Would she actually do anything if someone broke in? No idea but deterrence and alarm is really what you need. Plus, intruders usually will scout out the neighborhood and find a target. They will likely avoid the ones with a dog hanging out in the backyard.